Hyacinth
by trynathink
Summary: "Tess," Rosalie said seriously, her brows drawn together. Her golden eyes burned into mine. "Stay away from him."
1. A Strange Encounter

Part I : Cullen

* * *

Chapter One

 _April, 1955_

My life changed completely—for better and for worse—the very day I met the Cullens.

It was during the height of spring, which, in Forks, was just a muted version of winter. The wind still blew, but the bite was less fierce. The forests that encroached Forks were buzzing with life, glowing with a fervent green. Grandmama had decided to come visit us for the first time since my birth, which led Mama to stress over the tiniest of details: the throw pillows had to be fluffed _just_ right, the carpet vacuumed until it was spotless, and new curtains bought since the old ones were ragged.

Papa and Grandmama never really saw things eye-to-eye. Even my seven-year-old self could dissect the meaning behind his grumbling and her glares. Mama tried her best to ease the tensions, but nothing really worked. Her green eyes were fraught with stress, the turmoil in the household taking its toll on her. Papa noticed, of course, and so did Grandmama. And since they both loved my mother in their own strange ways, they promised to get along.

For now, at least.

"Can I go outside and play?" I asked eagerly, jumping with excitement at the thought of exploring the close-ranged forest. It was _so boring_ inside. Papa had gone out to take extra shifts at the police station, and all Mama and Grandmama seemed to do was sit by the windows with cups of tea and talk about all the years that had passed. I didn't understand half of it.

" _May_ I," Grandmama corrected from the corner of the living room, her grimace softening as she took in my small form. Her grey eyes warmed, and she brushed back a lock of her snow white hair.

Grandmama loved her daughter—my mother—but hated her choice to marry my father. She disapproved of my father's occupation in the Forks police force, and only tolerated him because my mother loved him with all her heart. When I was born out of wedlock, Mama told me she was worried that Grandmama would cut ties and ignore her for the rest of her life, but that wasn't the case. Grandmama simply adored me, and I loved receiving the warmth.

" _May_ I go outside and play?" I repeated, a little put off at the grammar lesson. My brows furrowed in annoyance.

"I don't see why not," Mama murmured, picking up a light jacket from the sofa and handing it to me to wear. "Just don't wander off too far, mon chéri."

"Okay, Mama!" I said eagerly, grabbing the light coat and running outside. My galoshes created sucking noises as I stepped into the moist mud that lingered just beyond our doorstep. It had just rained the night before. Grandmama had complained all day about it, and Papa had grown so frustrated with the whining that he left for yet another late shift at the police station.

I wondered briefly if Grandmama had wanted him gone, but shook the thought off. I didn't understand any of the motives behind Grandmama's grumpy actions when she visited us, but I did know that when she left, Mama and Papa made the house glow with their love.

In my seven-year-old mind, I likened their marriage to a Disney fairy tale. _Beauty and the Beast_ was my favorite, and since Mama was French, I thought it fit perfectly.

Along my trek through the woods, I was picking up small pebbles and examining them with half-hearted interest before throwing them aside. At First Beach, Mama and Papa would often look for shells and glistening rocks with me, but collecting little treasures in the forest was somehow different without them.

From behind me, I heard twigs cracking loudly. I turned around quickly, backing up against one of the nearby trees as two, five—no— _seven_ people emerged into the small clearing. My first thought was that they were all beautiful. Something about the way the dim, clouded light struck them made their alabaster skin shimmer.

"Look," one of them whispered, the shortest of the group. She wore a hairstyle that reminded me of the sun's rays, all spiky and shooting out in every direction. Her golden eyes shone as they stared me down. "There she is."

Another one of them slowly walked closer to me, crouching down until she was just at eye-level. "Hello, little one," she greeted me, her topaz eyes burning with warmth. Her voice rang like chimes in the wind, and her caramel hair was spun like cotton candy.

"Hello," I murmured back shyly, and the woman before me gave me a small, cautious smile. "Who are you?"

"I'm Esme," she said, reaching out a pale hand for me to take. A small worm of hesitation wriggled its way into my head, but I quickly pushed it aside. Something about the compassion that Esme exuded drew me into her. I put my small hand in hers and shivered slightly as her cold hand gripped mine. I was flooded by the comfort of her presence, although I couldn't quite wrap my mind around _why_ I felt that way.

Esme got up slowly, pulling my hand up with her. My head reached just past her waist. Esme gestured to the others who had accompanied her. "This is my family—the Cullens."

I cocked my head to the side, taking in their gleaming, golden eyes and concluding that they _must_ be related because they all shared the exact same eye color. "You have a very big family," I whispered conspiratorially to Esme, who only chuckled.

"I'm Alice," the woman with the jagged hair said happily, bounding forward with endless energy. She reminded me of a pixie. "We're going to be great friends, Therese!"

I didn't ask how she knew my name; the thought didn't even cross my mind. My mouth only shifted into a small scowl. "Only my Grandmama calls me that," I said with distaste. "I like Tess better. That's what Papa calls me."

Alice nodded enthusiastically. "I like Tess more, too."

Another woman stepped forward curiously. She was the most beautiful of all; her hair glimmered, reminding me unconditionally of finely spun gold. She was tall, contours and shadows perfectly engraved into her skin. She looked unreal, like a marble statue.

"You're very pretty," I said shyly, mouth slightly agape and not knowing what else to say.

She smiled, and her white teeth flashed. "Thank you. I'm Rosalie."

"Mama's name is Rosette!" I exclaimed happily, finding the coincidence funny. They both had blonde hair too, although the eye color was different.

As I finished my short quip, Rosalie's face fell a little, but perked up instantly as I continued to smile brightly.

"This," Rosalie began, pointing at a large, hulking man behind her, "is my husband, Emmett."

Emmett grinned at me. His black hair was short and very curly; I thought they resembled bristles on a brush. "Hello, squirt."

I wrinkled my nose, unfamiliar with the word. I thought it sounded kind of strange, too. Like something stuck in the mud. "What's a squirt?"

The others laughed, and Rosalie lightly smacked Emmett on the shoulder. "That's Edward," Rosalie continued, pointing at a bronze-haired man with an amused expression on his face. He cocked his head thoughtfully in my direction, and I grinned back.

"This is Jasper!" Alice interrupted suddenly, drawing forward a tall man with faint scars lining his face. Rosalie huffed at Alice from behind her. "He's very excited to see you, even if he doesn't really show it." Jasper gave me a small smile, his eyes teeming with curiosity. His hair was tousled and wavy, a little longer than Alice's, and the thought amused me.

"I like your hair," I giggled, finding my childish inside joke hilarious. He gave me hesitant smile.

Rosalie smiled warmly at me before pointing to the last unnamed member of the odd family. "This is Carlisle."

"My husband," Esme explained softly, her hand still clutching mine lightly.

"A pleasure," Carlisle said with a smile, his pale blond hair reminding me of my own.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, too," I said politely, suddenly remembering my manners. Grandmama would have been appalled had she been here.

A soft "Aww" escaped Alice's mouth. She looked between me and her family. "Isn't she just the cutest?"

Carlisle gave her a thin smile but nodded all the same. Alice squealed with giddiness, and I bit my lip nervously, a little put-off by Alice's energy.

"Wait," I said, a thought surfacing in my head. "What are you all doing here?"

"We were hiking," Esme explained softly, her head angled down toward me. "We were just headed home until we found you."

"Are you my neighbors?" I asked with excitement. Our house was enclosed, slightly cut off from the other residents of Forks. Mama had wanted it that way; when she emigrated from France, she valued her privacy above all else and felt as though the house was perfect. But, while she was fine with seclusion, I ached for company.

"Kind of," Alice said. "We're near you, but a little ways off. Would you like to come over for a bit? We'll bring you right back home!"

My brows furrowed for a moment. Nothing about these people screamed danger; in fact, they seemed the opposite of danger: sweet and kind and caring. "Okay," I acquiesced.

Alice let out a little cheer. The others appeared slightly wary.

"But I have to be home in time for supper," I said seriously. "Otherwise Grandmama will be annoyed, and that's never fun."

Alice nodded enthusiastically. "Of course, of course."

"How do we get to your house?" I asked.

Rosalie stepped forward and flashed me a blinding smile. "How does a piggyback ride sound?"

She stooped down to my level and scooped me into her arms. I clambered onto her back as carefully as possible, trying not to muss her golden curls.

And we were off.

* * *

 _A/N: hey! so this is an idea i've been thinking about/working on for a really long time. the story's pretty canon. it's essentially a Demetri/OC story, but it's got a long way to go before we even reach Demetri, so bear with me._

 _thanks for reading! and please review so i know if i should continue! :)_


	2. Secret Friends

Chapter Two

My mouth fell open when I took in the Cullens' house, or should I say _mansion_. It was much larger than any house I had ever seen. There were at least three floors, but the house itself didn't appear bulky. It looked rather spacious and gracefully put together; one of the sides of the house was made entirely of glass, and I was enraptured by it. To the eyes of a child, it looked like a palace.

"Pretty, isn't it?" Rosalie said, interpreting my silence for awe. She let me down from her back and took my hand, leading me into the house. "Esme designed it."

"Wow," I breathed. "Esme's very talented."

"She is," Rosalie agreed. Alice bounded to the front door and flung it open, welcoming us all inside with wide arms and an even wider grin. She just never seemed to stop smiling.

"This," Alice said, twirling in the living room with outstretched arms, "is our homely abode." The walls were painted a light beige, with some abstract paintings stuck on as decoration. A huge black couch was placed in the center, with a cozy rug laid out in front of it. A grand piano stood a few paces off from the couch, with a radio perched atop it.

I reached the floor mat, and then stopped, realizing that my galoshes were heavy with mud. I looked down at them, frowning at the muck that I had tracked in. Rosalie looked down at me with confusion.

"What's the matter?" she asked, a tinge of worry creeping into her voice.

"Her boots are muddy," Edward explained for me, somehow knowing of my situation. He was pretty observant, I supposed. "She doesn't want to mess the house."

"You are quite the proper young lady," Carlisle acknowledged teasingly.

I nodded, wanting to please these new neighbors of mine. "Grandmama always says that good etiquette is of the highest importance."

Emmett rolled his eyes. "You better not be like this all the time, kiddo."

I wrinkled my nose again. "Kiddo?"

"That's no good either, huh? It's gonna take a while to come up with a good nickname for you."

"But I already have a nickname. It's Tess, remember?"

Emmett scratched his head, a little confused. "Well, yeah, technically it's a nickname. But, like, a _real_ nickname, y'know."

"But that is a real nickname," I said matter-of-factly.

Emmett let out a loud sigh and fell onto the large couch. He threw his hands into the air. "I give up."

I giggled softly and turned to Rosalie who was looking at her husband with adoration. "Can you help me out of my boots, please?"

"Of course," Rosalie replied, bending down and removing the galoshes carefully. She set them right by the door, and I slid onto the wood paneling with my neon green socks. Emmett snickered at them.

"Don't laugh," I said, crossing my arms and sticking my nose in the air. "These are my most fashionable socks."

Alice beamed at me while Emmett doubled over in laughter. I grinned at him, happy to be the source of his amusement. I clambered onto the large couch and seated myself beside the hulking man.

"I like her," Emmett said after his laughter had died down. He patted my head heavily, and I huffed as strands of my pale blonde hair flew into my face. Rosalie sauntered toward the couch as well and sat beside me, leaving me squeezed between the two of them. She fixed the flyaway strands of hair with expert precision, her cool fingertips brushing against the side of my scalp.

"Would you like something to eat, Tess?" Esme called, her warm voice piercing the quiet air. Her hands were clasped together, her eyes awaiting a response. "Cookies maybe?"

My face lit up with excitement. Mama rarely let me have sweets; she thought I got too hyper off of sugar. Papa would always try to sneak me a few, though. "I'd love some! Do you have chocolate chip?"

Esme nodded happily. "I'll be right back." She walked speedily toward the open kitchen, which was somewhat visible from the living room since there was no door.

"We'll be back, too," Carlisle said as Esme left. He was looking at Alice with an expectant expression.

" _We_?" Alice said indignantly, her dark brows creasing. She ran a hand through her short hair. "But I wanted to—"

"Alice," Carlisle said lowly, sounding like a parent who was scolding their young child.

Alice fidgeted with the hem of her shirt for a moment before giving in. "Right. Let's go talk." She looked back at me and gave me a bright smile and quick wave before bounding into the kitchen as well. Carlisle, Jasper, and Edward followed her.

"Why're they leaving?" I asked Rosalie, looking up to her. The ends of her gleaming curls brushed against the top of my head.

She merely shrugged, not quite making eye contact with me.

"So...whadya do for fun, champ?" Emmett asked.

I pouted. I guess he wasn't going to let go of the nickname thing anytime soon. "Well, last summer, Papa bought me a whole new dollhouse. It's purple on the outside and has seven rooms inside of it!"

Emmett made a face. "Dollhouse?"

"What's wrong with dollhouses?" I said, narrowing my eyes.

"Wouldn't you rather go out and play ball or something?" He moved his head back a little and squinted at me. "You look like you could bat well."

Rosalie rolled her eyes. "Leave her be, Em."

"We used to go outside a lot," I said uneasily, my voice soft and shy, "but since Papa has so many shifts and I have school, we don't as much now."

Rosalie seemed to sense that I didn't want to talk about my family, so she tried to veer the conversation away. "Oh, you're in school? What grade are you in?"

"The first grade," I said proudly. "It's really, really fun! Last week, we started fractions!"

"Fractions," Emmett said with mock distaste. "My mortal enemy."

I rolled my eyes at his antics, sliding off of the couch. I looked up at Rosalie, and beckoned her to follow me. She took my hand as she got off of the couch, and I led her into the kitchen. I was curious to see what everyone else was up to and eager to see if the cookies were done.

Rosalie pulled me back a little. Her forehead creased in worry. "Maybe we should just wait out here, Tess."

I took my hand away from her grasp and crossed my arms. "Why?"

Just beyond the entranceway to the kitchen, I could hear the others talking quietly.

"They're probably busy," Rosalie said, laughing nervously. She turned around and waved Emmett over with a quick gesture of her hand. "Maybe we could just go outside and play?"

"...can't just take her," I heard Esme say indignantly.

My brows furrowed. My gaze fluttered from Rosalie to the kitchen and back.

"Yeah," Emmett agreed, nodding his head. "We could play catch in the backyard? How about it, champ?"

"How long?" someone said. It could've been Carlisle; the voice was deep but airy.

There was a pause, then I heard Alice's high voice. "Two days."

Emmett and Rosalie exchanged apprehensive glances.

"I wanna know what's happening," I said defiantly, making up my mind to figure out what exactly the Cullens were hiding. I had scarcely taken my first step into the kitchen, when Esme zipped up to me, a tray of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies in her mitted hands.

"Cookies are ready!" she said, a wide smile plastered onto her face. It didn't quite reach her eyes like before. From the corner of my eye, I saw Carlisle, Jasper, and Alice were seated at the dining table, artificial grins fixed onto their faces as well. Edward had the refrigerator half open, his head peering inside. The inside was bare.

I hesitatingly took a cookie from the tray. "What's in two days?"

I hoped it wasn't something bad.

Edward slammed the door of the refrigerator shut, and I jumped at the unexpected noise. The others turned to him, and Edward shot a very conspicuous glare at Alice before stalking away from the kitchen.

"I tried to stop her," Rosalie said sheepishly as Edward left.

Alice cleared her throat. "In two days...we'll be...leaving."

The cookie dropped from my hand, splitting in half as it hit the linoleum. "Leaving? But I _just_ met you!"

Esme stooped down to pick up the fallen cookie pieces. She gazed down at me; her eyes seemed like they were glazed over with tears, but she wasn't crying. "It's complicated."

My mouth shifted into a small frown. That was usually grown-up code for trouble.

"Will I still see you guys around somewhere?" I asked after a moment, my tone hopeful. I'd only been with the Cullens for a couple of hours at the most, but I felt close to them. I couldn't help but think that we were meant to be friends. Even if they did seem a little strange.

"Yes," Alice said definitively. She stood from the chair. "Very soon."

Carlisle was looking at Alice with a torn expression. "Alice..."

"In any case..." Jasper said, standing up as well. He glanced at the clock above the oven. "It's about time we get you home."

I nodded. Grandmama was probably getting worried by my prolonged absence. I moved toward Rosalie, my hands outstretched, ready for a piggyback ride back home. She scooped me into her arms. I could feel the cold radiating from her, even through my rain jacket.

"Wait, Tess," Carlisle said, moving forward. "There's one thing we must ask of you."

Rosalie shifted me so I was now on her back. I peered over her shoulder, my hair tangling into hers. "What?"

"You can't tell your family that you saw us."

My mouth fell open. _Secret_ friends? "But why?"

"Because...because..." Carlisle struggled.

"Because we're planning a surprise introduction for them!" Alice said with only a smidgen of her usual pep. I was confused by her sudden soft tone. "We need to properly introduce ourselves to our new neighbors, right?"

I nodded along. I guess that made sense. I felt Rosalie sigh heavily. Carlisle shot Alice another look, and Jasper put an arm around Alice's petite shoulders. Rosalie turned away from the scene and began trekking back to the living room. She grabbed my galoshes as we made our way to the door.

"See ya, champ!" I heard Emmett boom. The others soon followed with their own goodbyes, their voices melding together.

"Bye, everyone!"

Rosalie began running at a leisurely pace into the woods. I clung a little tighter onto her neck.

"Tess…" Rosalie whispered up to me.

"Yes?"

There was a long pause between the two of us. The trees flickered by as Rosalie's pace increased. I gripped her neck a little tighter.

"In two days, you're going to have to be very brave," she said at last.

She stopped, and I lurched forward a little by the suddenness of it. We were back at the small clearing where I had first met her family. I could see my cream colored house in the near distance. Rosalie let me down from her back, and helped me slip my boots back on.

"Why do I have to be brave? Because you're all leaving?" I questioned.

She squatted down to my level and pulled me in for a hug. Her long fingers began to stroke my hair. "If you want us to come get you, then just think about us, okay? Think about leaving with us. Think about coming back outside into the woods and seeing us again like today. Make the decision to see us, and we'll be there, okay?"

"Okay," I whispered. I was beyond confused, but I wasn't sure what to ask of her. There were already quite a few questions burgeoning in my head. _Where are they all going? Why was Edward so angry? Why are you so sad?_

She let go of me and turned me around so I was facing the direction of my house. When I looked back, she was gone.


	3. Loss

Chapter Three

They were arguing again.

I was hidden against the banister, watching from my perch on the stairs as Grandmama and Papa fought for what seemed like the hundredth time today. Mama had one hand laid on Papa's wrist, trying to get him to give up. There was no use yelling at a storm.

Grandmama was laid back against her rocking chair, arms crossed, nose stuck in the air, lips molded into a scornful grimace. Papa's glare was unforgiving. His square stance, his curled fists—everything about him screamed that this was a fight he would not let go of, but he turned away from her anyway.

"Why...why don't we go out for dinner tonight?" Mama suggested, her voice high-strung and anxious. She released Papa from her light grip. She twirled the end of a lock of her light blonde hair around her index finger—a nervous tick. "I'm sure we could all use a night out."

Grandmama let out a breath of air. "Fine. But it needs to be a _good_ restaurant."

Papa let out a huff and walked out of the living room. He and I both knew that Forks didn't have a restaurant that served cuisine that could meet Grandmama's standards.

He reached the stairs and caught my eye. His glossy brown eyes softened immediately. He lumbered up the stairs and sat next to me on one of the steps. He scratched his head, his calloused, tanned fingers ruffling through the thinning strands of pale blond hair.

"We're okay," he whispered after a moment of silence. "Your gram and I—we don't hate each other. It's just...hard for us to see eye to eye."

I took in his wide, tired face. The corners of his eyes were crinkled with laugh lines. He was fidgeting with his hands, his fingers tapping against each other apprehensively.

"I know."

"It'll get better," he promised. "It's hard for her, too. She doesn't have anybody left back in France."

I nodded.

He patted my back heavily. "Where d'ya wanna head for dinner, Tessie? How about we go to The Lodge? It's your favorite."

"I don't think Grandmama would like going there." It was always crowded, and there were stuffed animals stuck to the walls. Certainly not the kind of high-class restaurant Grandmama would like to go to.

Papa let out a sigh. His eyes were trained on the ceiling. I could tell he was frustrated.

"Why don't we go to that Italian place?" I suggested after a few moments of silence lapsed. "The one Mama likes?"

His mouth quirked into a lopsided smile. "Good idea, kiddo."

* * *

"I don't know _why_ she married you," Grandmama muttered.

We were only ten minutes into our drive to La Belle Italia when it became evident that while Papa had let go of the fight, Grandmama certainly hadn't. She was determined to have the last word.

Papa's eyes flashed in the rearview mirror. They were dark, the brows drawn together in anger.

" _Excuse me?_ Actually—no, I know why you don't know. Why you never knew. You never knew when your own daughter left France, when she came here, when she married me, when she had a _child_. There's a reason for all that, Gise—"

"—I am not daft!" Grandmama's voice was like a whip through the air, shrill and needling. I shifted away from her in the backseat, turning my head toward the outside, watching with growing discomfort as our car sped past the trees that lined Forks. "Whatever our differences were, Rosette and I have worked them out! _You_ , on the other hand—"

"—What about me?" Papa yelled. His voice thundered.

"You don't _deserve_ her." Grandmama's voice was hard, bitter. "Rosette, I told you this a long time ago, and I still stand by it: Divorce him. Come back to Bordeaux with Tess."

My head whipped back to the front of the car. I stared in shock at Grandmama's stiff, stoic profile. She wasn't going to relent anytime soon.

"Maman…" I heard my mother whisper from the passenger seat. "Pas maintenant."

Tears sprung up in my eyes. Was divorce really a possibility? It couldn't be! They couldn't just leave each other like that! I trembled in my seat. Papa caught my darting, jade eyes again.

"Look!" he grunted. "You've made Tess upset!"

Grandmama looked down at me, her grey eyes wide. "Mon chéri, don't worry. You'd like it in France. The countryside is so beautiful this time of year, and—"

"—Maman!" my mother said sharply. She had twisted in her seat and was looking at me, taking in the tears that were now dripping slowly onto the plush car seat. "Nothing's happening, Tess. No one's going anywhere."

"For the moment," Grandmama mumbled.

"I am so sick and tired of your bull!" Papa slammed a hand against the steering wheel. Mama turned back into her seat, glaring at him reproachfully. He made a forceful right turn, and the momentum of the move made me slide down my seat. "For once, can you just keep your comments to your—"

"—Hank!" Mama screamed. "Hank, watch out!"

I scrambled in my seat, moving myself upward and craning my neck to get a look at the dump truck careening toward us. I heard Grandmama gasp next to me, her breaths sharp and sudden. I felt one of her bony hands grip my shoulder tightly.

This wasn't real. It wasn't going to hit us.

Papa turned our car to the left, thrusting his whole body in the direction the steering wheel moved. Through the windshield, I could make out a row coniferous trees. The front of the car collided with a sickening smack against the bark, and I felt something in me snap against the restraint of my seat belt.

My head fell back dizzily. Grandmama was yelling, and then she wasn't. Someone was shouting my name, but I couldn't place the voice. Nothing made sense. I tried to shift, but found that I couldn't feel my limbs. I felt disconnected from my body. My neck was angled so that I could only see the top of the car. The back was smooth, undented, but the front was wrinkled and busted like it was just a sheet of aluminum foil.

 _We crashed_ , I realized dimly. _We actually crashed._

The last thing I could recall before I succumbed to the encroaching darkness was Mama screaming my name.

* * *

The sharp smell of antiseptic was what woke me up. I inhaled it deeply, coughing softly as I came to. I blinked blearily against the all-encompassing lights. Everything was too bright.

"She's awake!" a clear, feminine voice called out. I turned my head to the side and winced as the side of my scalp throbbed with the movement.

"Careful," a soft, stern voice commanded.

My eyelids felt like lead, heavy and aching to stay shut, but I kept them open all the same. The doctor was short and plump. His face seemed too small for his features; thick, scruffy eyebrows adorned his large crystal blue eyes. An equally bushy mustache was plastered above his lips. He was looking intently at a clipboard.

"Que ce passe-t-il?" I groaned. I could scarcely recognize my hoarse voice. The words croaked and died in my throat.

"I'm Dr. Stewart. We recovered you from the crash. Thankfully, your injuries are not life-threatening, although they are quite painful." His lips were pulled into a consolatory smile. His forehead was creased in concern. I could tell he was used to this sort of thing.

"Where is Mama?" I whispered. "Je veux ma maman."

A strange look passed over his face. He seemed unsure of what to say; his smile faltered then fell. His eyes flickered to the curtains that enclosed my hospital bed.

"Where are my parents?" I repeated. I felt something wet slide down the side of my face, mixing into my matted hair. I was beginning to fear the worst. "Where are they? Where are Mama and Papa? Tell me!"

He seemed alarm. "Please don't stress yourself; you're in critical condi—"

"No!" I wriggled against the bed. I could feel the bandages wrapped around my torso grow loose. I tried to move my left leg, but the weight of the cast rendered it unusable. "Where are they?!"

Dr. Stewart swallowed thickly. "We couldn't save them. I'm sorry."

The world stopped. The doctor was talking, but I couldn't hear him. The lights swelled above me, flooding me in their luminance. My lids fluttered to a close, but the light seared through anyway.

I felt like I had been in another collision. My body froze up; my heart was rattling in my ribcage, beating furiously with the pass of every millisecond. My lungs shut down. My breaths became short and raspy before ceasing altogether.

That wasn't true. This couldn't be true.

* * *

In my head, it kept playing in slow motion: Papa's white-knuckled grip on the steering wheel, Mama's shouting, the truck veering toward us, the rain as it beat against our windows, the sharp turn of our black Cadillac...

I couldn't put the pieces together as a child. I was too young to understand how the collision had resulted in their deaths. I was too young to understand how Papa's swerve into the tree wasn't the result of a fidget; it was the only way he knew to save me. A collision with a two-ton truck would've killed us all; a crash into a tree line would've left someone alive.

But I didn't know that at the time. I only knew that everyone was gone. I only knew the burning hate I felt for the feud between Grandmama and Papa, for the petty arguments that had ripped everyone I loved away from me. My memory of them soured as the day of the funeral came closer.

Only my mother's visage remained intact—her tinny voice, her bright green eyes, her wavy golden hair, her warm pale hands.

I couldn't stop crying. The tears always managed to sneak up on me.

I felt a pat on my shoulder and looked up. A man with sandy brown hair dressed in a shabby black suit was gazing at Papa's grave morosely. It was Phil, one of Papa's friends at the police station. He threw a lily onto the growing pile of white and pink flowers. I followed his line of sight.

RIP

HENRY JAMES SWAN

 _son, brother, husband_

His features scrunched together. "I didn't know Hank had a brother."

Janet, my newly assigned social worker, nodded from my side. She pushed back her black hair with a thin, coffee-colored hand.

"Why can't he take Tess in?"

I shivered against the cold. I knew of Uncle Geoffrey, but I had never met him. Janet raised the possibility of living with him two weeks ago, but quickly renounced her suggestion after realizing that Uncle Geoffrey didn't have a stable job and was a frequent visitor of one of Forks' nighttime bars.

"He's not..." Janet hesitated, "suited to care for a child at the moment. At some point, maybe. But as of right now, the only place for Therese is a foster home."

Phil didn't say anything, merely giving me another light pat before ambling away.

After a few more minutes of silence, I felt Janet place a warm arm around my black-clad figure.

"C'mon," she murmured. "It's time to go."

"Okay."

My face fell as I realized that _I_ could leave. I was still here, still present and existing and _alive_. I could go and find a new home and slowly forget, but Mama and Papa would always remain here, six feet under the cold, muddy soil of Forks Cemetery.

* * *

Janet let me go to my room alone, finally allowing me a moment of privacy and quiet recollection. She had told me to gather any last few items I might want to take with me, but I wasn't sure if I wanted anything from here.

I crossed the expanse of my carpeted room, looking around at my stuffed animals, my coloring books—my purple dollhouse. I turned away. I felt my heart constrict painfully.

The rain beat painfully against my window pane. I stared at my beige walls, thinking over the plan for today: gather any last items, say goodbye to everyone, and ride with Janet to the foster home in the next city over. I let out a defeated sigh. I didn't want to go to a foster home.

The thought of running away had briefly crossed my mind before, but I didn't know where to go. I was eight years old and had no money or real experience in the outside world. I had grown secluded in Forks, one of the most desolate towns in the nation. I wouldn't last a day on my own.

 _If you want us to come get you, then just think about us, okay?_

I walked toward the window and looked outside. The sky was thundering with its storm; the treetops whipped from side to side, soggy and downtrodden with the weight of the rain. I opened the window, pushing the lower pane upward and squeezing my eyes shut as I was hit by a gust of chilly wind. It was impossible for the Cullens to come here in this weather. It was impossible for them to come at all.

 _Think about leaving with us. Think about coming back outside into the woods and seeing us again like today._

How could they come? We didn't live in a world where people could magically appear at one's whim. I didn't understand how Rosalie could have told me to think of the Cullens for them to materialize.

This wasn't a fairy tale.

My face crumpled. I backed away from the window and sat on the edge of my bed. No happy endings.

 _Make the decision to see us, and we'll be there, okay?_

I thought about the Cullens all the same. My mind told me it was stupid to put my hope in a group of people I had only met for a couple of hours, but my heart swelled at the thought of seeing them, of being with them.

Lightning flashed, swallowing me in the brilliance of its glow. I blinked against it, and when I reopened my eyes, Rosalie and Alice were standing in front of me.

I rose from my bed and stretched my arms out to Rosalie, who picked me up in one swift movement. I buried my face in the crook of her neck. The tears began to slip from my eyes, so I closed them shut, trying to hold back the waterworks. They always found a way through despite my best attempts.

Rosalie's chilled hands stroked my back.

"We're going home now," she said softly, so soft I almost didn't catch it. "Keep your eyes closed."

I never wanted to open them again anyway.

* * *

 _A/N : thanks so much for the reviews, the commentary really means a lot!_

 _i feel like the turn of events here came way too quickly & without much prefacing, but this was the main catalyst for the story to actually begin, y'know, so i was eager to get to it. in a couple more chapters, the story will actually begin to delve into the Twilight world. right now, it's kinda just floating haha :)_


	4. The Cullens

Chapter Four

"Tess," a soft voice whispered. It felt like a summer breeze, tickling my outer ear. "Time to wake up."

I shifted over, turning away from the voice and aching to be swallowed by sleep again. It felt nice to sleep, to be warm and protected and encased in that darkness. To not have to remember Mama or Papa or Grandmama. To not have to relive the crash.

A hand pressed itself against my cheek lightly, and I flinched at the sudden coolness of it, my eyelids flickering open.

"Huh?" I said, straightening myself up. I found myself nestled in the corner of a deep blue, plush couch. Rosalie was kneeling in front of me, her topaz eyes wide and shining. Her plump pink lips were curved into a small smile.

"Finally awake, sleepyhead," she joked weakly, getting up from the wood paneled floor. "You're at our house in Oregon."

"Oregon?" I repeated, cocking my head. I wasn't sure where that was.

She nodded, and moved out of the way, opening my line of sight to the rest of the Cullens. They surrounded me in an arc, watching me expectantly—some warmly, others warily. I could understand that my presence here was sudden and a bit unannounced, so I felt bashful under their gazes, choosing not to meet their eyes. I trailed my sight onto the sides of the couch, touching the edges where the stitching peeked out with nimble, fretful fingers.

"Hello, Tess," Alice said at last, running a hand through her short hair. She shot me a hundred-watt smile, which faltered quickly when Carlisle raised a pale blond eyebrow at her. Alice rubbed a hand along the length of her right arm, standing a little apart from the rest of her family.

"Hello," I whispered back, unsure of what exactly I was doing here. Was I going to stay with the Cullens? _Could_ I even stay with them? What was Janet going to do when she realized I was gone? When _everybody_ realized I was gone?

Edward cleared his throat, stepping forward a little. The light hit his hair in a way that made it seem almost like bronze. "I'm sure you have a lot of questions."

"Uh...yes…."

"We felt like it wouldn't be...prudent...to allow you to stay in a foster home," Edward started.

My brows furrowed at his explanation. Prudent? Like kind? I wasn't sure what he was getting at.

"We thought," he amended quickly, "that it would be _better_ if you stayed with us instead of in a foster home. In fact, Rosalie and Emmett have agreed to adopt you."

Adopt?

My gaze shifted to the couple. One of Emmett's pale muscular arms was wrapped tightly around Rosalie's waist. Rosalie's shoulders were tense, her hands clasped around each other. She gave me a hesitant smile.

 _Adopt_.

Part of me was pleased by this. I wouldn't have to return to Forks. I wouldn't have to be cooped up in a foster home with a dozen other rowdy kids. I wouldn't have to go my whole life wishing for a family that could replace the one I lost.

And part of me was not. Part of me was confused. Why hadn't they come to ask Janet for me? Why did they even want me? They barely knew me. Why did they wait so long? The crash happened weeks ago.

I felt my body seize up a little. My breaths became quick, short bursts for air. My heart was going about a hundred miles a minute.

Edward's gaze shifted from me to Jasper, who remained stony faced, his amber eyes glancing between me and the floor. The others seemed about as nervous as Jasper. Carlisle eyes were glistening, his lips pressed into a thin, sad frown, one of his arms wrapped around Esme's waist. Esme herself was trying not to look at me, her hands busying themselves with the apron that clung loosely to her body. Rosalie and Alice seemed to be undergoing some sort of silent form of communication, and Emmett...

Well, Emmett came over first.

"Hey, champ," he whispered, his voice rumbling like a boulder, his dark eyes shining. "Don't get caught up in the details, okay? Rose and I will take care of it."

He sunk into the couch, pushing me toward him. One of his large hands rested on my head.

"Try to relax. You've had a hard couple of days."

Rosalie walked over as well, completing our new, small family. Emmett moved over to allow her room on the couch.

"It'll be better tomorrow. Esme patched up a little house near a school for the three of us. Your room is a little bare right now because Alice and I weren't sure what you'd like, but we can go shopping soon and you can choose whatever you want…" Rosalie rambled before biting her lip and pausing. "I know...I know you miss your family, but believe me when I say Emmett and I will try our hardest to be as fantastic as your parents were."

That was the tipping point. Tears began to spill from my eyes. Emmett and Rosalie engulfed me in a hug.

"Please don't be like my parents," I mumbled, my voice warbled through their arms.

I couldn't handle another crash.

* * *

 _September, 1955_

"You've got to eat up for your first day of school, hon," Rosalie chirped happily, pushing my plate of buttermilk pancakes drenched in maple syrup toward Emmett. "Do you mind cutting up her pancakes, Emmett? I've got to find Tess the _perfect_ first day outfit."

Emmett wordlessly took a knife and fork in his large hands and began to carefully cut up my pancakes into child-sized bites as Rosalie flitted away to my room.

"What're you and Rosie going to do while I'm at school?" I asked as Emmett handed me back my plate. I shoveled up some bits into my mouth immediately, savoring the warm taste. Rosalie made absolutely the best pancakes.

Emmett looked at me thoughtfully, one hand rubbing his jaw. "Honestly, champ, I'm not sure. I guess Rose and I could get some stuff around the house done."

I nodded silently, choosing to focus on my food for the next couple of minutes. I'd been wondering for a while now what Emmett and Rosalie would do when I wasn't at home. We had spent every day of the last few months together, never leaving each other's sides. In fact, Rosalie decided to homeschool me through the rest of the third grade because she didn't want to leave me alone at school yet.

Of course, once autumn came back round, Emmett and I managed to convince her to let me go to school on my own. She still wasn't too sure about it, though.

I swallowed down the rest of my pancakes quickly before bounding toward the bedroom, where, true to Rosalie's word, the _perfect_ first day outfit less: a pink cotton lace dress with a magnificent bow wrapped around the waist lay on the bed. A pair of Mary Janes with white socks had been set aside on the floor.

I smiled to myself as I changed into the clothes. Honestly, I wasn't sure how Emmett or Rosalie got half the things they had purchased for me. I hadn't seen them go out for work at all since we had moved into the new house near my school. Maybe Carlisle just provided for everyone; being a doctor was a very well-paid job, and he _did_ work at the best hospital in Portland.

"Tess!" Emmett's voice boomed through the house. "Rose just started the car. Apparently, if we don't leave in the next thirty seconds, you won't be _five minutes early_ like she wants."

I giggled at the heavy sarcasm in his voice and grabbed my bag full of newly purchased school items before heading toward the living room where Emmett awaited with an exasperated Rosalie at the threshold of the open doorway.

"I didn't say we _have_ to be early," Rosalie grumbled. "Just that we _should_ be. Don't you want to meet the teachers?"

"No."

"Well, we _are_ ," Rosalie said sternly, and I knew that Emmett would end up complying anyway.

"C'mon," I said excitedly, skipping out of the door and toward the jet black Rolls Royce that was purring in the driveway. I scrambled into the backseat as Rosalie swiftly sat at the driver's seat and Emmett settled in the passenger's side.

I craned my neck toward the side window, watching with fascination as the cookie cutter houses and sparsely spread trees flew by as Rosalie revved on. I wondered endlessly about the new school. How different would it be from Forks? Would the classrooms be larger? Did they have recess in Oregon? Long lunch breaks?

I was giddy with prospect as Rosalie pulled into the allotted area outside the small school building. Emmett stepped out of the car and helped me out as well, grabbing onto my small hand as we walked toward the school entrance, Rosalie trailing beside me while nervously wringing her hands.

"What if she gets sick?" she whispered to Emmett. "We won't be there and—"

"I'll be fine, Rosie," I said happily, one hundred percent oblivious to her worries.

Rosalie stopped abruptly and grabbed onto my other hand, causing Emmett and I to come to a halt as well. She twisted toward me and bent down so we were eye level. Her eyes were shining with barely restrained tears. I stared into her golden eyes, taken aback. Was Rosalie really this upset about me going to school?

"I just want you to be safe, hon," Rosalie said softly, her voice strained.

"It'll be okay," I said in the same quiet tone. "I'll make a ton of friends, and I'll bring them over, and—and—"

"I know, I know." She took a deep breath. "I guess—I guess I'm just a little emotional, you know?"

I tore my hand from Emmett's loose grip and enveloped Rosalie in a tight hug. Her arms immediately wrapped around my torso. My face was smothered by her honey colored hair. Her naturally cold flesh clashed against the childish warmth that exuded from my body, and I shivered against her slightly as she drew me deeper into the hug. One of her hands rose to stroke the back of my head, her fingers running through my growing pale blonde hair.

"I'll be safe," I promised. My voice was a little muffled. "You're always there to protect me."

The grip around my body became a little tighter.

* * *

 _February, 1956_

Emmett and Rosalie preferred to live nearer to the school I was going to, which meant that we all lived quite a distance from the rest of the Cullens. They all lived in the next city over because that was where Carlisle primarily worked. And since I often complained about the fact that they were too far away to see on a regular basis, Em and Rose had decided to delegate weekends to visiting the rest of the Cullen family.

This particular day was a bit different than the rest. Usually, Em and Rose talked and caught up with Alice, Jasper, and Edward while Carlisle would be putting in extra hours at the hospital, leaving me in the calm, blissful company of my adoptive grandmother—Esme.

"Oh, I'm sorry, dear," Esme said in her soft, soothing voice, tucking a lock of hair behind my ear. "I've got an emergency appointment with a client of mine."

I pouted, my lower lip trembling. "But we were supposed to do painting today!"

She had _promised_ last weekend that we could paint one of the spare rooms in a house she was renovating with whatever color I wanted.

"We can do that next weekend, okay?" Esme paused. "And I'll bake you some chocolate chip cookies, too. How does that sound?"

I bit my lip and slowly nodded. No matter how much I loved Rosalie's cooking, Esme's was simply out of this world. Her cookies were the perfect balance of soft and crunchy, sweet but not too sweet. I obstinately believed that Esme could get her own cooking show if she wanted. Or publish her own cooking book. I was sure either one would become a huge hit.

"...and here's the name and number of her pediatrician," Rosalie rattled off in the background, writing the details on a notepad and showing Edward. "Wait, let me add the dentist, too—"

"Rose," Edward groaned. "Why on earth would I need her dentist?"

"Anything could happen, Edward!" Rosalie shot him a glare. "What would you do if she broke her tooth, huh?"

"Doing what?!"

She gave him one of her infamous side glares. "I _know_ how you cook, Edward."

I looked at Edward hesitantly. He certainly wasn't my first choice as babysitter. When Rosalie had said that she and Emmett had to go visit someone for passports this weekend (and since Esme couldn't look after me this time), I assumed Alice and Jasper would be babysitting me.

Unfortunately, they both decided to take off for an impromptu vacation to Alaska (Emmett mumbled something about distant relatives when I pressed for details on their mysterious trip).

Which left me with Edward.

Rosalie flipped to another page in the notepad. "And this is a list of things she's _not allowed to eat under any circumstances_."

"Why is chocolate on this list?" Edward asked bemusedly, peering at the page.

I pouted and Emmett ruffled my hair, causing blonde strands to fall haphazardly onto my face. I swatted them out of the way impatiently.

"Sorry, champ," he said. "I tried to tell Rose it's fine, but after the last time you had chocolate—"

"It was an accident!" I tried to argue, but a smile betrayed me. It really wasn't an accident that _all_ the Christmas chocolate had found a way from the dining room to my bedroom.

Emmett chuckled.

"...and if anything happens to her when I'm gone—a scratch, a bruise, _anything_ —I swear you'll be in a world of pain, Edward Masen Cullen," Rosalie finished off. She turned around and kneeled down to my height to give me a hug and quick kiss on the forehead. "We'll be back before you know it!"

With that, she took Emmett by the hand and trekked to the front entrance, Esme following them. As the door clicked behind them, I turned to Edward, who was looking down at me uncomfortably. He raised a hand and scratched the back of his neck.

This was probably his first time babysitting _ever_.

A full-blown grin bloomed across my face. I could use this to my advantage.

"So...what do you wanna do?" he said at last, staring at me nervously.

"Chocolate!" I cheered, already making my way toward the kitchen. Since I usually helped Esme bake on weekends, I knew exactly where she stored the chocolate chips she put in all her cookies.

"Wait—Tess, you're not—Tess!" Edward called behind me as I broke into a run so he couldn't catch me. I slid into the kitchen and clambered onto the stool that had been set beneath the cabinet above the stove.

As soon as my small, pale hands had grasped onto the knob, I felt two chilly hands lift me by the waist and set me back onto the ground. I spun around in annoyance, my arms crossing themselves in front of my chest. I glared at Edward Cullen's exasperated face.

"Rose said no chocolate."

I rolled my eyes. "She won't mind a little bit."

"She'll kill me," Edward deadpanned. When he saw my bemused expression, he decided to expand. "No, really. She'll stab me and bury my body somewhere out in the woods. Your mother is scary."

"I'm going to tell Rosie you were telling me about murder," I said with amusement. "I don't think she would approve."

This time Edward rolled his eyes. He latched onto one of my hands and guided me back to the living room.

"Do you want to—um—we could—"

"You're really bad at this."

"Well, what do you and Esme usually do?" He huffed and fell back into the couch, sprawling across the seat.

"Chocolate."

He raised an eyebrow. "Oh, _really_?"

Well, not all the time. Esme usually did some of her renovating assignments while I watched and occasionally helped. Sometimes she would tell me these really interesting albeit creepy stories about past family members. Her most recent story had been about one of Jasper's distant relatives who had snuck into the Confederate army to join the Civil War when he was young. He was taken hostage by a group of Mexican rebels or something. No one in Jasper's family ever heard from him since.

"You wanna hear a story?" Edward suddenly asked, somehow deducing what Esme and I actually did together.

I shook my head. Stories were a special thing between Esme and me.

"Play piano?"

I blanched. Play piano? Was Edward secretly an eighty year old man? Who just played piano for fun? Even Carlisle wouldn't suggest something like that.

Edward appeared frustrated at this point. His head was tilted toward the cream ceiling, which he was glaring holes into. He ran a hand through his dark chestnut hair, tousling it.

I let out a sigh, deciding to take pity on him. Edward was the youngest in the family (not counting myself), after all. " _Fine_. What story did you want to tell?"

He continued to stare at the ceiling, tapping his fingers against the couch lightly. I lay further into the pile of throw pillows in the corner of the couch, bringing up my legs and wrapping my arms around my knees. I savored the warmth.

"Did Esme ever tell you about Alice's great grandmother?"

I shook my head.

"Well—" Edward grinned suddenly, bringing his face so it was level to mine, "—she was psychic."

The hour passed by swiftly as Edward spun a tall tale about Alice's great grandmother having been plagued with terrifying, vivid visions of people every since she was young. Her family and friends eventually believed her to be crazy, and she was soon cast out from her small little town in Massachusetts. The story was fuzzy in some parts (Edward said this was due to poor family records), but what was important was the ending: Alice's great grandmother eventually found love in a diner with a gentlemanly veteran soldier.

"Wouldn't it be absolutely amazing if Aunt Alice could tell the future, too?" I said happily, still enraptured by the story as a whole. "Like—if she had inherited it from her great grandmother?"

Edward gave me a tight smile, shifting his gaze toward the floor. "That would be something, wouldn't it?"

* * *

 _A/N : thanks for all the wonderful reviews & sorry for the long wait! i hope the long-ish chapter makes up for it._

 _honestly, it's gonna be awhile before Demetri makes his first appearance, so i hope you'll stick around till then! :)_


	5. A Slip of the Tongue

Chapter Five

 _December, 1957_

Usually for Christmas, Rosalie and Emmett would take off from work for the last week of December so we could all spend the holidays together at Carlisle and Esme's manor. Alice would drag Rosalie and me off to various malls and shopping outlets so we could buy the perfect presents for everyone. Esme would enlist my help in baking special Christmas cookies (which, for some reason, only I would end up eating). Emmett and Jasper would try to get me to play a friendly game of baseball, but I would refuse every time because 1) it was always too cold and 2) 'friendly competition' with Emmett inevitably turned into a bloodbath. And Edward would teach me new songs to play on the piano, play board games with me, and just keep me entertained by any means possible so I didn't bother the others when they went out for winter hikes (apparently hiking was best in the snow).

But this year's Christmas was going to be different. Carlisle and Esme weren't here because they had to go off to Italy for some business trip. I was disappointed when Rosalie told me this, because Esme always made me the best hot cocoa to drink right before bed. But that letdown was nothing in comparison to the crushing disappointment I felt when I learned Edward was going away to visit some relatives in Alaska.

"But why can't _I_ go to Alaska with you?" I whined to Edward, basically clinging to his left leg as he tried to shake me off.

"Because Rosalie would kill me if I took you out of the state. Besides, there are bears in Alaska," he said with exasperation, trying to pry me off of him with his cold hands.

I rolled my eyes but released him. "I don't think we need to worry about bears. You wanna know why?"

A look of apprehension crossed over Edward's face. "...Why?"

"Lucy's the smartest girl in grade four and _she_ said that bears won't attack if you play dead. So if we just play dead every time a bear comes, we'll be fine!"

Edward blinked in surprise and relaxed. "We still can't go. Alaska's cold and far away. You'd hate it."

"But I like the cold!"

"Tess, you made Alice bundle you up in five sweaters before playing in the snow an hour ago."

"I'll wear five sweaters to Alaska!"

Edward closed his eyes briefly and pinched the bridge of the nose, looking very much like how my math teacher does when he checks over my classwork. As Jasper entered the living room, Edward looked up and made eye contact with him, silently conveying something to him.

"She wants to go to Alaska," Edward explained.

Jasper raised a brow and his lips curved into a small frown. "Why?"

"Because for the last two Christmases, Edward would play piano and tell me stories about his childhood and read _The Little Matchgirl_ to me before bed, and if he goes then who's going to do all that with me?" I sniffled softly and turned back to Edward. "It's our _tradition_ , and if you go to Alaska, we can't continue."

"Tess, we can do that when we get back," Edward said softly.

I shook my head adamantly. "It's not the same. You're _abandoning_ me—"

"I'm not abandoning you, Tess—"

"Jasper!" I said, whirling around. "Tell Edward he's _abandoning me_!"

"He's not—"

"ALICE!" I hollered, my voice cracking. ROSIE!"

"Oh, no," Jasper said quickly, trying to soothe me. "Please don't—"

"I cannot believe this happening," Edward muttered. "I'm supposed to leave in an hour, and now—"

"What's wrong?!" both Alice and Rosalie exclaimed shrilly, rushing into the living room.

Rosalie took one look at my tearful state and was at my side in an instant. She shot a long and hard glare at Edward before pulling me into a warm hug.

"What's wrong, sweetheart?" I heard Rosalie whisper softly. My thin arms circled around her waist, returning the hug. "Did Edward say something?"

"I didn't say anything!" Edward protested

"He's going _away_ ," I cried into Rosalie's arms. "He's _abandoning_ —"

" _Jasper_ ," Alice hissed under her breath. "Do something."

"I can't," he replied, exasperated. "You know it doesn't work on her—"

"Tell Edward not to go," I told Rosalie.

"Tess," Rosalie sighed softly. She released me a little, and lifted up my chin up so my tearstained face and hers were level. "Edward can't stay. He really has to go."

"It's not fair," I said quietly. "It's gonna be Christmas."

"He'll come right back," Rosalie promised.

I frowned, not sure if I believed her. Carlisle and Esme had only _just_ left, and now Edward, too? Who was next—Alice and Jasper? And then Rosalie and Emmett? Were they growing tired of me? Were they fighting like Papa and Grandmama used to? Would I be left alone again?

"Rose," Edward sighed tiredly. "I've got this."

Rosalie rose from the hardwood floor and crossed her arms, glaring at Edward. "Oh, do you now? Because right before I came in here, it looked like you were driving her to tears."

Edward frowned, and his lips moved for a moment but no sound came out. I rubbed my teary eyes wearily—maybe he hadn't said anything at all?

" _Fine_ ," Rosalie hissed.

She locked eyes with Jasper and Alice, and inclined her head toward the door. Within seconds, they had all left. Edward lightly padded forward and kneeled down in front of me, his amber eyes soft and sorry.

"Please don't go," I said again, raising my sleeve to wipe away my stray tears.

"Tess, I'm not abandoning you," Edward repeated quietly. "I'm not tired of you. I'm not fighting with anybody—"

"Rosie looked pretty mad—"

"Rosalie always looks like that," he dismissed. "Listen, Tess: None of us are leaving you behind. Carlisle and Esme were called over to Italy for an important trip. And I've got to meet someone in Alaska. That's all. We'll both be back. We'll always come back. You're stuck with us, kid. For a lifetime."

I mulled this in my head and slowly extended my right pinky out to Edward. "Do you promise?"

He hooked onto my pinky with his. "I promise."

* * *

 _March, 1958_

"Okay, I think this is how it goes," I began seriously, pointing to the one-dimensional image of the human body. "The food goes in through the mouth, and then it goes down the throat, and then into the stomach, and then through these weird tubes over here—" my finger traced over the large and small intestines, "—and then it comes out the butt!"

Carlisle winced at my crude explanation but smiled softly nevertheless. "That's close enough."

I grinned and closed the anatomy textbook before slumping over on the table and watching Carlisle rifle through some medical files on the hospital. My green eyes roved over various x-rays of broken bones.

"Carlisle," I hummed softly, "can I ask you a question?"

"Of course," he said, eyes not leaving the documents.

"How old are you?"

"Thirty-two."

"Oh."

Carlisle looked up and chuckled at my dismayed expression. "Was that not the answer you were expecting?"

"My friends think you're twenty," I explained. Carlisle had to pick me up from school last week because Rosalie and Emmett were in the middle of some hike (it was always a hike). His appearance at the schoolyard had caused quite a stir. About four or five teachers went up to flirt with him. "They say you're too young to be my adoptive grandpa."

"Well," Carlisle began carefully, setting down his pen. "I adopted Rosalie, Emmett, and the others when they were almost fully grown. When I was just in my twenties."

"I get that," I said rolling my eyes. "It's just that I made a bet with my friends, 'cause I didn't think you were _that_ young."

He frowned. "You made a... _bet_?"

I nodded enthusiastically. "Emmett makes bets all the time!"

"Does he now," Carlisle said dryly.

"Anyway," I continued. "I bet that you're fifty—"

" _Fifty_?!"

"Yeah."

"I don't look _fifty_ ," Carlisle protested.

"I _know_ that," I said. I cocked my head a little. "I know you _look_ young...but sometimes you act kind of old. Like you talk about old medicine a lot and old history a lot, too. And you don't really speak like other adults."

Carlisle's gaze returned back to his medical documents. The frown on his face was still present.

I shrugged. "I guess I just thought—I dunno—you're pretty old but you got plastic surgery to cover it up or something."

The frown disappeared, and he laughed.

"The problem is that now I owe each of my friends a dollar…."

Carlisle quickly sobered up. He pursed his lips. "Ah, yes, this 'betting thing.' Do you mind finding Emmett and sending him up here?"

* * *

 _June, 1959_

"Are we there yet?" I asked with increasing boredom, staring out the window and watching our car speed past the others.

"Nope," Emmett said cheerfully from the passenger's seat.

"When are we getting there?" I moaned, turning away from the car window and sprawling all over the backseat. "It's been _hours_."

"It's been thirty minutes, Tess," Rosalie corrected softly.

"It feels like it's been _an eternity_!"

"You've really gotta spend less time with Alice, champ," Emmett said, shaking his head. "You're turning into mini-Alice. Next thing I know, you'll be dragging Rose and me off to go dress shopping."

I frowned when Emmett mentioned Alice.

Today was the day we were all moving from Portland to Minnesota. Well, all of us _except_ Jasper and Alice, who decided to spend some time living alone all the way in _Texas_.

"Hey, where did mini-Alice go?" Emmett called. "When did she get replaced with mini-Edward?"

I rolled my eyes. "I'm not mini-Edward."

"Keep brooding like that, and you might be," he teased.

"What's wrong, Tess?" Rosalie asked worriedly from the driver's seat. Her golden eyes flashed in the rearview mirror.

I shrugged. "Just wondering when I'll next see Alice and Jasper. They're moving so far away…."

"I give them two weeks tops," Emmett said lazily. "They always talk about moving away, but Alice can't bear being apart from us. They'll be back before you know it."

"Hmm," I hummed quietly, digesting this news. "So they've never been away from you guys?"

"Nah."

"What about you and Rosie?"

"Well—a couple of times. We spent our honeymoon away from everyone, obviously. And when we lived in Portland with you, we were away from the others."

"We visited them like every weekend," I said. "I don't think that really counts as 'away.'"

Emmett shrugged. "I think the only one who's actually spent time totally _away_ from Carlisle and Esme was Edward, right Rose? I mean I wasn't there, but he said back in the '20s—"

"Emmett!" Rosalie snapped, and he fell silent.

"Um—I mean—"

"What do you mean 'the '20s'?" I asked, confused. "Edward's like barely twenty. He wasn't alive during the 1920s."

"Uh—"

"He meant the early '50s, hon," Rosalie stepped in. She shot Emmett a glare. "Didn't you, Emmett?"

"Yeah," he said, nodding strongly. "Slip of the tongue. My bad. I meant like 1953-ish. Back when Edward was—um—was like—"

"Thirteen or fourteen?" I supplied.

"Yeah!"

"Edward lived away from Carlisle and Esme when he was _thirteen_?"

"Well, no—"

"He ran away from home," Rosalie interrupted, her voice hard. "He wasn't actually _away_. It was just for a week."

"Why'd he run away from—"

"It's almost lunchtime, Tess," Rosalie cut in quickly. "Do you want to stop at a restaurant and get a burger?"

I frowned. "Okay?"

"Alright, good," Rosalie said, and she flashed me a smile from the rearview mirror, but it didn't quite reach her eyes.

* * *

 _A/N : sorry for the incredibly long wait! now that college is finally over and summer is here, i'll hopefully be able to post more frequently! :)_


	6. Revelations

Chapter Six

 _February, 1961_

After I turned thirteen, Carlisle and Esme picked me up from school more and more, Rosalie and Emmett less and less. They didn't tell me why, but I knew. Rosalie and Emmett looked as if they were barely past their twenties. Would anyone really believe I had been their adopted daughter for the past six and a half years?

I barely believed it myself.

Where our neighbors would begin to collect wrinkles or blemishes, the Cullens remained impeccable, somehow frozen in the amber of a moment. Alice's hair never grew out, and Esme's didn't grey. The only thing that changed about them was their eye color—switching from amber to onyx, day to night, almost at random.

I couldn't deny that there was something strange about my family. There was something uncanny about the way Edward always knew what I wanted before I knew it myself, about the way Alice knew who was coming to the door before the doorbell rang, about the way they all moved, even—with an almost inhuman agility, without the slightest misstep or stutter. Where I fell and bumped into things, Rosalie and Emmett and the others skirted around obstacles with an endless grace.

I waited for a long time, hoping an explanation would just appear eventually. Maybe it was all coincidence. Maybe their youth was due in part to some imported, miracle-working moisturizer. Maybe their alternating eye color was a side effect of some unique genetic condition.

No such explanation ever came up, and although I was not a patient girl, I didn't say anything. Mostly because I didn't want to sound like a lunatic. But also because I was afraid I might get an answer I didn't like.

* * *

 _August, 1962_

I thumbed through my journal lazily, mindlessly glancing through the rough sketches and short entries I had collected over the past couple of months. It was Jasper's idea to start a journal, but I wasn't sure if I was convinced a journal was something worth keeping. I spent more time drawing than writing, and when I did try to write, it would end up being something short, simple, and thoroughly uninteresting.

I pursed my lips as I landed on the last page—a drawing of Rosalie. She was washing the dishes when I drew this one, and the dim light that managed to pass through the heavy overcast from the window hit her skin in such a way that it almost seemed to sparkle.

"We're going out for a hike, hon," I heard Rosalie yell from the living room.

I sighed and closed the journal, rising from my bed. I tossed aside the journal and grabbed a hair band, quickly tying up my unruly pale hair into a loose ponytail before heading downstairs.

"Do you want us to whip up something for you before we head out?" Rosalie asked as she spotted me making my way down.

She was by the door, tugging on a lightweight jacket. Behind her was Emmett, who was peering out the window.

"A hike?" I questioned, glancing at the window. A sea of dark clouds was slowly swarming the sky, and a ferocious wind was whipping the surrounding trees into a flurry of swinging branches and leaves. "I think there's gonna be a thunderstorm. It's probably not a good time to hike."

Rosalie blinked, and something unreadable crossed her face. "We'll be quick. The rain will probably come and pass in a couple of minutes. We'll be fine. Now, do you want any lunch first? I'm not sure when Esme might come back, and—"

I crossed my arms. "I heard bears like to go out when it rains."

"That's not true," Emmett said, turning around. He wrapped an arm around Rosalie's waist and drew her close to him. "Besides, I'm not sure it'll even rain."

"Yes, it is!" I insisted. "They like to come out just after it rains, when things are still damp. What if one comes out while you're out hiking and attacks you, huh?"

"Why do you know so many bear facts?" Edward drawled, coming into the living room.

I stuck my tongue out at him, and he returned the favor by rolling his eyes at me and plopping down on the couch.

"They'll be fine," Edward assured. "The weather looks alright."

"The clouds are pretty dark—"

"Tess," Rosalie said sternly. "Emmett and I are going, and that's final."

For a moment, it seemed as if Rosalie's eyes had grown darker, changing from a murky, dark khaki to an even deeper coal-black. I furrowed my brows and thought back to the drawing, to Rosalie's shimmering skin and her large smile and her usually bright eyes and her extravagant beauty. There was something off about all of it, how coldness accompanied her skin, how her smile sometimes seemed frozen, her eyes sometimes dark, her beauty too unearthly.

What was she hiding?

"Then can I come?" I pressed. "If the weather's good, can I come too? I'm feeling kind of outdoorsy today—"

"Absolutely not," Rosalie snapped. "Don't you have homework, Tess?"

"It's summer, Rosie," I reminded her. "No school."

"I—" Rosalie looked to Emmett desperately.

"This is a private hike, champ," Emmett said to me. "We'll take you out some other time."

"You guys go on hikes too often," I huffed. "No one else I know does that. What do you guys _do_?"

Maybe they all visited the fountain of youth deep in the forest and drank from it. That sure would explain how they all look the exact same from five years ago.

"We've really got to get going, Tess," Rosalie said.

I frowned. "But _why_? It's not like the hike is going to leave without you."

Rosalie grabbed onto Emmett's hand tightly and crossed over to the doorway. One slight, pale hand of hers reached out for the doorknob but stopped as soon as Edward opened his mouth:

"We've got to tell her," he said softly.

Rosalie let go of Emmett's hand and whirled around with such speed and force, I was afraid she might give Emmett whiplash.

" _What?_ " she growled, and I shivered unconsciously.

"She knows," he said.

I furrowed my brows. Knew what, exactly? That they never aged? That their eye color changed? That their hikes probably weren't just hikes? That the fact we moved to a new city every two years made me feel like they were fugitives or something?

"We can't," Emmett said. He looked wildly to Rosalie. "She's too young—"

"Edward's right," Alice piped in, coming in from a different room, Jasper and Carlisle trailing behind her. "And Carlisle thinks so, too."

"I thought we should've told her _years_ ago," Carlisle said smoothly, meandering around to Edward's side. He crossed his arms. "It's time, Rosalie, Emmett."

Rosalie looked stricken, glancing at each of her family members worriedly before settling on me. I turned away from her roughly and looked to Alice. She clucked her tongue softly and came over to me, taking one of my hands and gingerly leading me over to the couch Edward was sitting on. She sat down at the other end and patted the space next to her.

I wrung my hand away from hers and stepped back. "Wait—what's going on? What're you guys going to tell me? How did you even know what we were talking about?"

"You've noticed," Edward sighed, "that we don't grow, don't eat, don't really _act_ the way other humans do."

Other _humans_ do?

"You really should sit down for this," Alice said softly, almost solemnly, all the usual traces of pep and cheer in her voice gone.

I shook my head vehemently. "Can you guys just tell me what's happening?"

I turned to Carlisle, because I knew of all the Cullens here he was the only one who could never resist giving me the answer straight away. But, under my gaze, he said nothing, instead coughing slightly and turning to look at Edward.

I looked at Edward, too. "Are you guys sick or something?"

He shook his head. "We're...different from other people."

I bit my lip in confusion. This was just _too_ strange. I was sure this was a conversation ninety-nine percent of families did _not_ have. What kind of conversation starter was 'we're different from other people'? Did that mean they weren't like people? Were they human?

"No," Edward said. "We're not."

"Not what—"

I cut myself off, horrified, and backed away from Edward, into Jasper, whose nimble fingers came to rest cautiously on my shoulders.

How had Edward known my silent, unspoken question? How did he know what I was thinking? No one could read minds, right? I couldn't read other people's minds. Normal people couldn't read minds.

"Normal people can't read minds," he agreed.

I turned around and grabbed onto Jasper's hands tightly, looking up at his faintly troubled face.

"He's lying," I said to him. "He can't read minds. Tell me he's lying—"

"He's not lyin', darlin'," Jasper said softly.

Then I was dreaming. I _had_ to be. That was the only possible explanation at this point. This was some strange fever dream. I was hallucinating. I was having a nightmare where my entire family suddenly turned into mind-readers and—

"You're not dreaming," Edward said, interrupting my internal reverie.

"Oh my god," I breathed, shaking off Jasper and turning to the others. "Can you _all_ read minds, too? How is this possible? I don't get it—"

"Tess," Rosalie said, her voice trembling, her eyes gentle yet worried. She had one pale hand out, reaching for me.

I took it with no hesitation, rushing into her, into her familiar, motherly embrace. My arms wrapped around her waist automatically, and I closed my eyes, hoping that when I opened them I would be somewhere else, somewhere where things made sense.

"What's happening?" I asked, my voice muffled. "I'm confused, Rosie."

"Tess," she said again, and I felt her hand stroke my hair soothingly. "We're not human."

I tensed in her arms, and the stroking stopped. "Then what are you?"

She didn't respond. My grip loosened, and I stepped away from her. My lips were parted, my jaw gone slack. My brows were knitted together, my eyes wide with fright.

"What are you guys?" I asked again, my voice a whisper.

Please be fairies. Please be elves. Please be something nice and helpful and magical. Please don't be—

"Vampires," came the gentle voice of Carlisle Cullen.

My green eyes swiveled to his golden ones. There was something soft and caring and sorry in his eyes.

"What do you mean?" I asked, my voice so quiet I wondered how any of them even heard me.

"We're vampires," he repeated, this time with more firmness.

"I don't understand," I said. I glanced from person to person, my gaze shifting erratically between all the people I had thought were _human_ , were _normal_ up until this very moment. How long had they been vampires for? Were they planning on making me one? Was that the reason they had adopted me in the first? "How did this happen? I—I don't get—"

"We've been vampires for a long time," Edward explained. "We were changed far before you were born. Carlisle was changed in the seventeenth century—"

" _The seventeenth century_?!" I exclaimed, turning toward Carlisle. He didn't look like he was much older than twenty-five. "You—what—"

"Maybe now's not the right time to get into—" Emmett began.

"Why'd you take me?" I cut in, gazing at the family of vampires with new eyes. "I don't understand what _vampires_ would want with a human child."

Everyone turned to look at Alice.

"Maybe Emmett's right," she said lightly. "It _is_ getting late, and—"

"No, now's exactly the right time! Can someone explain what's happening?" I exclaimed, growing frustrated. "I have no idea what the _fuck_ —"

"Language," Rosalie said sharply.

"Are you _kidding me_?!" I cried. "You guys are all _freaking_ vampires now, and _I_ need to watch my _language_?"

Alice sighed. "Edward once told you that I had a psychic grandmother, right?"

"Yeah."

"He was actually talking about me—"

" _Oh my god_ ," I said, whirling around to the others. "That means the other stories—that means—oh my goodness. So Jasper was in the Civil War?"

"Yes."

"And it was Esme who fell from the cliff, not her mother?"

"Yes."

"And Edward died from the influenza? And Emmett got mauled by a bear?"

"Yes and yes."

"What the f—"

"Tess," Rosalie warned.

"I still don't get what _vampires_ would want with _me_ ," I said. I glanced around the room, my eyes bouncing from pale face to pale face, an uneasy feeling steadily growing in the pit of my stomach. "A—are you guys gonna _eat me_?"

"What?" Rosalie said. "No—no, sweetheart, of course not."

She reached out to me and took a step forward. I took one back, and Rosalie's hands dropped to her sides. She stilled and her eyes glazed over. Emmett came up next to her and softly whispered something in her ear.

"We're vegetarian, Tess," Alice said.

My brows furrowed. "You eat vegetables?"

"No," Edward said. "We drink animal blood instead of human blood. We're _like_ vegetarians—"

"What? No you're not!" I paced in front of Alice and Edward, my hands tugging at my wild hair. "Vegetarians don't drink _animal blood_! You guys drink freaking _animal blood_ —wait. Oh my god, is that what you guys do on your hikes?"

"Well—yeah, but—"

I scrunched my nose in disgust. "That's so gross!"

"It's not that bad," Edward began before stopping himself and considering it. "I mean, I guess from your perspective—"

"I _still_ don't get _why_ you guys would want _me_ —a human, non-vampire child?" I frowned. "I mean, I think a vampire child would probably be more fit for vampires than a human one, right?"

"Vampires can't have children," Carlisle said.

"Then how do you get more vampires?"

"When we bite people, our venom can change them into a vampire."

I shuddered. "Oh."

"That's not why we took you," Rosalie said quickly. "We're not changing you, Tess. We're not—we're not going to hurt you—"

"Then why am I here?"

This time, everyone looked to Carlisle. He sighed heavily and took off his glasses. "Because of the Volturi."

"The what?"

"Vampire kings," Alice said quickly.

"Okay?" I bit my lip. Vampires had royalty? I supposed that made sense—to keep order within the vampire community—but perhaps a vampire president would be more democratic.

Edward snorted from across me.

"The Volturi are attracted to power. When they find a talented human who would have great power when turned into a vampire—like Edward's mind-reading or Alice's psychic abilities—they change that human into a vampire and force them to serve as one of their guard," Carlisle continued.

"What does that have to do with me?" I asked.

"After your parents died, you were to be sent to an orphanage upstate." Carlisle glanced at Alice uncomfortably. "Alice had a vision that a vampire would… _visit_ …the orphanage, and find you."

"So?"

"According to the vision, this particular vampire would realize you have a power and take you to the Volturi in order to seek some form of immunity for herself. The Volturi would confirm you _did_ have great power and would change you as soon as you were old enough. You'd be forced to live with them until such time, and serve them after." Carlisle paused and took a deep breath. "Because we met you previously and saw that you were good and kind and undeserving of such a fate, we decided to have Emmett and Rosalie adopt you so the Volturi would not get their hands—"

"Hold on, hold on, hold on," I said excitedly. " _I_ have _a superpower_?!"

"Well—"

"What is it?" I all but yelled. "Is it flight? Can I teleport? Can I shoot lasers from—"

"Just a minute ago, she was ready to have a panic attack," Edward muttered under his breath.

"We're not sure what your power is, Tess," Carlisle said calmly.

"Then how do you know—"

"You don't have a scent," Jasper cut in. "Other humans do. They have a specific smell attached to them, but you don't. Not to mention, my power doesn't work on you."

"What's your power?" I asked curiously.

Jasper was a fighter, so his power had to be something really strong, like smashing through walls or setting things on fire with his mind or—

"I can feel people's emotions and change them at will."

"Oh." I glanced at Alice and then back at Jasper. "Sorry, but Alice's is cooler."

He smiled. "We think mine doesn't work on you because it's a physical power. Whatever power you have, it's probably something that can deflect physicality—"

"We're thinking like a force field or something," Alice finished for him.

My eyes widened. "That's so _cool_!"

"I think that's enough questions for today," Rosalie said sharply, glaring at Alice. "We don't _know_ if that's your power, Tess. We're not even certain if you have a power, okay? So don't get that into your—"

"I can't _not_ have a power, Rosie," I said stoutly. "You guys took me 'cause I'm special, so I've _got_ to have a power. I just gotta wait till I can _get_ the power…." I paused as the full weight of this realization sunk in. I whirled around to Carlisle and smiled brightly. "When can I become a vampire?"

"That's enough!" Rosalie said shrilly, stomping forward. "It's getting late—"

"It's only four," I protested.

" _It's late_ ," she repeated with a voice that left no room for argument. She raised a hand and pointed upstairs. "Go to your room Tess, I'll be up soon. I've just got to—" she scowled at the surrounding Cullens, "—have a _pleasant chat_ with my loose-mouthed family."

"But—"

"C'mon, champ," Emmett said tiredly, taking me by the hand and herding me up the staircase despite my fervent complaints.

Emmett opened the door to my room, and I trailed over to my bed, resigned. I picked up the journal I had tossed onto the sheets earlier and flipped open to a new page. I grabbed a purple marker from my bedside table.

"Tess?" I heard Emmett call up hesitantly.

"Yeah?" I asked, looking up.

He was hunched over in the doorway, his lips twisted into some sort of grimace. "You know that Rose and I—we love you. It doesn't matter that we're vampires and that you're not. You're—we've _always_ considered you our daughter, and—"

"I know, Em," I assured, uncapping the marker. "I love you guys, too. The vampire thing freaked me out a bit, but I'm okay now. I get it. I think it's cool."

He grinned, and I returned to my latest entry: VAMPIRES ARE GREAT.

* * *

 _A/N_ : i'm really struggling on finding Tess's voice because i've kind of been speeding up the timeline and just capturing snapshots of her life amongst the Cullens for now. right now, she _is_ still just a child, and my writing kind of wavers between prose and a childlike voice. but hopefully, when we reach the main narrative/age, it'll steady out. and btw, if you felt like the explanation Carlisle gave was a bit stunted or incomplete or just awkward (i.e. glancing at Alice a lot), it's cause they're all still hiding something.

also, thanks so much for the reviews, guys! please try to review if you can, it really motivates me to continue the story! thanks! :)

 **Brookeworm3** : it's gonna be a while till we reach Demetri. Tess and the Cullens still have a long way to go and their own hurdles to overcome. the way i've plotted out the story has Tess meeting Demetri around chapter 14 or 15.


	7. Family

Chapter Seven

 _September, 1963_

Vampires were absolutely _not_ great. A couple of them are okay, but _some_ vampires (I'm not going to name names here, but this particular vampire's name rhymes with Shmedward) like to blast rock music at full volume in the middle of the night and just oh-so- _casually_ mention how I once ran into a pole right in front of my crush. Other vampires (name rhymes with Shmasper) preferred far more subtle methods of torture—walking me from class to class and glaring at any student who dared glance at me and nearly beating up a history teacher who gave my Civil War essay an F.

In short, high school with vampires was living hell.

"Here," Rosalie said, pulling out a brown paper bag from the depths of her handbag. "I made you a meatloaf sandwich _and_ there's some raspberry Jello in a container—"

"Rose," I hissed, snatching the lunch bag and stuffing it into my backpack. "I'm not a little kid. You don't need to pack me lunch. I'll get it from the cafeteria—like everyone else."

Rosalie pursed her lips. "They're serving _tuna fish_ , Tess. You _hate_ tuna."

"I don't hate tuna," I protested, shouldering my backpack. I tucked some stray hairs behind my ear and glanced longingly at the lunch line. A group of girls were clumped together near the back, chatting animatedly about something. I turned back to Rosalie and straightened myself. "I actually kind of like it now. It's an acquired taste."

She gave me an unimpressed look. "Is it now?"

"I'm gonna get a tray," I said, beginning to shuffle away from Rosalie. "Why don't you find a table with the others? I'll come over as soon as I get some food."

"But I already packed you some perfectly good—"

I dodged out of earshot before I could hear anymore of Rosalie's rant and meandered over to the girls near the end of the line. One of the girls—dark-haired and short—smiled when she caught my eye.

"Hi," I greeted, tagging onto their group. "You're in my history class, right?"

She nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah, yeah. My name's Millie!"

The rest of the group had stopped chatting. The other three girls stared at us with bright, curious eyes.

"I'm—"

"Tess!" the other girl finished. "We know."

I faltered for a moment. "Oh, okay. How did you—"

"Because you're always with him, silly," another girl with deep blue eyes interjected. She inclined her head toward the other end of the cafeteria, where Jasper was walking around puddles of students with a pained expression on his face.

"Oh, yeah. That's Jasper. He's my brother."

Millie blinked owlishly. "A—are you sure?"

Well, in truth, that was a lie. But it was the cover story we were all supposed to go along with in New Orleans—that Rosalie, Jasper, and I were all siblings that Carlisle had adopted two years ago after our own parents, who were close friends of his, died in a fire.

"Because you two look a little different," Millie continued. "He's got this—" she gestured around the face a little, "and you're kind of…."

"Um—"

"Millie!" the other girl admonished. "That's so rude and completely untrue. Of course Jasper and Tess are siblings—look at the hair!"

I grimaced and tugged at the ends of my choppy blonde hair. I knew what Millie was getting at, and it wasn't exactly hard to notice or figure out. I didn't quite fit in with any of the Cullens. They all held a certain glow. I looked utterly drab next to them.

"Thanks," I muttered unsurely, turning away from the group to grab one of the crimson trays.

"My name's Eliza," the blue-eyed girl said, grabbing a tray as well and sidling up next to me.

She followed me as I moved along the line, dumping various heaps of indiscernible gloop onto my tray. (Was that supposed to be a scoop of tuna fish salad or _cement_?) I wrinkled my nose as the strong smell of fish hit me.

"So—um—tell me about your brother," Eliza said, moving to get some orange slices. "What's he like?"

I shrugged. "He's a huge dork. He likes country music."

She beamed at me. "Is he single?"

"I—wait, what?" I said, turning to her in surprise.

"He's so dreamy," she gushed. "And I absolutely _love_ country music. Has he heard that new single by Johnny Cash?"

I turned from Eliza and looked at the lone table that had been pushed into the corner of the cafeteria. Rosalie was sitting there sullenly with Edward and Jasper, who looked like they were trying very hard not to burst out laughing.

"I'd better get back to my family," I told Eliza hastily. "They look pretty lonely—"

"I could join you!" Eliza offered immediately. "The more the merrier, right?"

"Uh—"

"There you are, Tess!" a light, happy voice chirped behind me, and I let out a breath of relief as Alice placed a small hand on my shoulder, turning me toward her and tugging me away from Eliza. "I've been looking all over for you. We've only got about fifteen minutes before lunch ends and…"

I looked back and gave Eliza what I hoped was a convincing apologetic expression. She pouted back for a moment, but then whirled around and flounced back to her friends.

"Aunt Alice, you are an absolute life-saver," I breathed, following Alice toward the Cullen table.

"Well, I'm not your favorite aunt for nothing," she said cheerfully, taking a seat besides Jasper.

"You're my only aunt—" I began, but she had already turned away from me, pulling Jasper into a the beginning of what seemed to be a serious conversation.

"Are you seriously going to eat that?" Rosalie interjected, grimacing as she pointed to the lump of semi-solid tuna fish salad that was in the center of my tray.

I sat across from her, my back facing the rest of the cafeteria, and pulled my backpack into my lap. I slowly took out the brown bagged lunch Rosalie had packed, fishing out the meatloaf sandwich.

"I knew it," Rosalie said smugly, relaxing into her seat.

"Just this once," I warned, biting into the sandwich and savoring the taste, "and only because I _really_ don't like tuna."

"What about next week when they serve tuna again?" Edward said, but I ignored him, silently munching on my food.

I glanced away from my family, toward the rest of the students who swarmed around the cafeteria in large groups. A couple of people here and there eyed the table curiously, but the vast majority averted their eyes. Perhaps they could sense, as I once did, that there was something strange about the Cullens. Perhaps they could tell that none of us really belonged here. And as I saw a couple of sneering older students pass by our isolated table, a new thought emerged: Perhaps they didn't want us here.

* * *

 _August, 1964_

"This is completely unfair!" I shouted, balling my hands into tight fists.

Emmett winced while Rosalie glared down at me, no doubt in the formative stages of her own angry tirade.

"We've got to go, champ," Emmett said softly, earnestly trying to sway me over. "I know it's barely been two years, but the locals are growing antsy. You know the other doctors are beginning to grow suspicious of Carlisle. We can't afford to stay here any—"

"Yeah, _you_ can't," I shot back vehemently. "Because you're all vampires. You'll all be running for the rest of your lives, for all of eternity. But I'm _human_. It's not fair! It's not fair that you have to drag me along with you every single—"

"Would you rather we just left you here?" Rosalie snapped. "Is that what you want, Therese?"

The moment stilled, and I inhaled sharply. "Maybe."

Rosalie's jaw slacked, and her anger faded away as quickly as it had come. And even though she knew I didn't really mean it—who could mean anything in the heat of such an enraged moment?—she knew I had to have considered it. Emmett's brows had flown up to his hairline, and he was staring between Rosalie and me, worried about what might happen next, apprehensive about which side he might have to choose.

"I'm sorry," she said tightly, "but this is the way it is."

My eyes narrowed, and against my better judgement, I found my mouth opening, readying itself to dispel another low-blow.

"We're leaving tomorrow morning," Rosalie said tonelessly before I could get out so much as a word. "Carlisle and Esme will be here to help you."

And the unspoken " _because we won't_ " hung heavily in the air as Rosalie turned on her heel and headed toward the banister. Emmett cast me a long, faintly disappointed look before following his wife up the stairs. A crushing guilt swooped over me as he left, and I angrily swept up my loose hair into a tight ponytail, stalking over to the kitchen and pulling open the refrigerator door with far more force than necessary.

I was just trying to make a point. Did they really have to react like that?

"'Carlisle and Esme will be here,'" I muttered under my breath as I pulled out a pudding cup.

Rosalie was probably ringing them up right now.

I sat myself down at the dining table, spoon in one hand and pudding cup in the other, temper slowly fading as my thoughts turned over: Would she still be angry tomorrow morning? Probably not, I decided quickly. Though Rosalie was quick to anger, she was also quick to forgive.

It was a quality I had yet to learn.

As I sat in the open-windowed dining room, the latest argument between myself and my adoptive parents fresh and brooding in my head, I remembered something. It was distant and hazy, but I remembered all the same—an argument that didn't need to happen, the sharp turn of a steering wheel, and an earth-shattering boom as unstoppable force finally met immovable object.

I bit my lip, and stared down at my hands. What if Rosalie never truly, completely forgave me? Could one small slip of the tongue really cost me so much?

It did my grandmother.

* * *

 _December, 1964_

I was watching Alice hunt. It wasn't an activity Rosalie was particularly fond of letting me engage in, but it was a part of our agreement—being less restrictive so I could become more responsible. Besides, it was silly of her to worry when it was only Alice I would ever accompany. There was very little chance of error or accident when I had a literal clairvoyant only a few yards away from me.

It was winter, so the bigger animals were too wary to come out. Alice had zipped around the clearing a couple of times, catching a red fox and two long-eared hares, sucking them dry as a husk within a few minutes. When it became evident that she wouldn't get much more out of this hunt, she wiped her mouth against the sleeve of her sweater daintily before heading over to my perch in a low-hanging tree.

"Ooh, did you draw me?" Alice asked as she spotted the familiar sketchbook in my lap.

"I tried," I said, twisting the page over so she could see what I had drawn—a shadowy blur darting across a grassy surface to a still rabbit—"but you're too fast."

"The bunny looks cute," she commented.

I wrinkled my nose. It didn't look very cute when its throat was up against Alice's sharp teeth.

"You've got that look again," Alice sighed, beginning to scale up the side of the tree.

"What look?" I asked as she side-stepped onto the lowest branch and scooted over besides me.

"The 'oh-yeah-my-family-are-a-bunch-of-vampires' look."

I rolled my eyes. "That wasn't what I was thinking."

"Then what were you thinking?" Alice pressed.

"Ask Edward."

Her gaze wandered to the snowy clearing below us, and an uncomfortable silence swallowed us for a few moments. My eyes lingered on my drawing—on the dark, slim figure that covered more than half the page. Frowning, I closed my sketchbook and lifted my eyes to get a better look at Alice.

"I don't blame you," she said, catching my gaze in the corner of her eye. "It hasn't been very long since you found out—"

"I guess two and a half years isn't very long for you," I supplied humorlessly.

"No. It isn't," Alice said, and she smiled wryly. "How are things with you and Rose? Is she holding up to Carlisle's advice?"

I shrugged. There were days when things were okay, when Emmett and Rosalie and I felt like a real family—a real _human_ family—laughing at programs, going shopping, fixing cars. But those days were rare and, more often than not, came to a screeching halt, either broken by Emmett and Rosalie's need to feed or my need to feel _normal_. I didn't like staying in our bare house, looking at our nearly empty refrigerator, lack of pictures, and bed-less rooms.

We moved around too often for any house to feel like home. We moved too often for any city to feel welcoming.

"I'm tired of this," I said at last. "How are you not tired of this? Running around, pretending you're something you're not, hiding the biggest secret on the planet?"

"I suppose it's just become habit," she said simply.

"I don't think I could ever become used to this." I shifted on the branch and looked over at the sparse treeline. "Sometimes," I began slowly, softly, unsurely, "sometimes I wonder what would have happened if you left me with a normal, human family instead."

"The grass is always greener on the other side," Alice said, and her tone was airy and unaffected.

"Don't you wish it sometimes, too, Alice?" I whispered. "Not having to pounce on animals, not feeling the burning thirst in the back of your throat?"

"I wished it when I was a newborn, when I was travelling alone," Alice began. "Hardship always feels worse when you think you're the only one experiencing it. Suddenly waking up one day with a thirst for blood is scary, but waking up with no one to tell you what's happening, with no memory of how you got to this point—that was the worst day of my life." She paused and looked at me, golden eyes wide and soulful and earnest. "But you got me through it."

"Me?" I said with confusion. "I wasn't even there."

"You were in my visions," Alice said wistfully, turning back to the horizon. "I remember them, clear as day: first was Jasper, then the Cullens, then you. I was alone and scared, and then the visions came. It was like a knee-jerk reaction, a subconscious way of telling me I wouldn't be alone for long, that my family would be there soon."

"Oh."

"I don't wish I was human again, not anymore. Sure, the thirst is mildly annoying, and I wish our skin didn't glitter in the sun so I could go out more during the summer…but it's all worth it. It's all worth it because it led me to you. It led me to a family who loves me."

* * *

A/N : thanks for all the reviews, and sorry about the delay on this chapter. hope you enjoyed it, though! :)


	8. The Second Secret

Chapter Eight

 _June, 1965_

Sneaking out of a house full of vampires was no easy task. In fact, it would have been nearly impossible were it not for the fact that everyone except for Emmett had gone out hunting.

"Tess!" I heard Emmett call. "You wanna order out? I don't know where Rose put the leftovers!"

"Uh—yeah!" I yelled back, tying the last white sheet to the long chain with a thick, tight knot. "Pizza?"

"Sounds good, champ! I'll ring up the place down the block!"

I grinned to myself. Now was the perfect chance. Emmett would be too busy on the phone to hear any noise or scuffle I caused by climbing down from the second floor of our newly renovated colonial house.

I tied one end of the knotted sheets to the leg of my bed and carried the rest of the bundle in my hands. I dropped them out of the open window in my room, wincing as they thudded lightly against the dirt ground. Pleased, I smoothed down my light blue dress and tied up my pale blonde hair in a tight bun before putting one leg out the window and grabbing onto the sheets with both hands. Taking a deep breath, I hefted the rest of my weight out the window and hugged the makeshift rope with my entire body, slowly shifting myself downwards, careful to limit the noise I made.

Besides the occasional ruffle of fabric, I made it to the ground without incident. I breathed in the night air deeply, smiling to myself before turning on my heel, and rushing away from the block.

I only had a limited amount of time to reach my destination—Jason Wheeler's end-of-the-year party two streets down from my house—before Alice got a vision. It was only now that my decision to attend the Wheeler party was cemented; I had been hovering on a 'maybe' for weeks now, wavering between sneaking out and staying in. I wasn't sure I could pull off the former. But when the others had left to go hunting and the perfect opportunity had presented itself to me...well, who was I to deny fate?

I straightened up as I spotted a cramped house on the edge of Somerset Street. Soft rock music emanated from the open windows, and I could just make out a couple of dancing, laughing figures.

I sprinted up to the door and knocked rapidly against the mahogany, trying to catch my breath and slow down my racing heart. My stomach was bubbling with excitement—or maybe guilt.

A tall boy with dark windswept hair opened the door and beamed down at me. "Cullen!" he shouted, and someone behind him whooped happily. He craned his neck beyond the door and looked around the street, the smile slowly disappearing. "Uh—where's the rest of your family?"

I shrugged, and pushed my way past him, inside the house. "They're busy."

"Oh." His shoulders sagged, and he closed the door. "That's too bad. I was hoping your sister would be here."

"Yeaaah!" another boy slurred, tottering into me. "The smokin' hot one!"

I moved away from him. "Um, yeah—maybe she'll show up?"

Both boys brightened up at this, and the taller one led me toward the kitchen, picking up a beer can and thrusting it into my hands. "Well, until she does, we better drink up!"

I squirmed uncomfortably under the arm he had wrapped around my shoulders and stared down awkwardly at the drink. The tab had already been opened. "Oh, I don't really—"

"Jeez, Cullen, can't you loosen up for at least five minutes?" the boy said, letting go of me and rolling his eyes.

I gave him an uneasy smile, and lifted up the can, taking a large gulp and hurriedly swallowing so I wouldn't have to feel the taste of beer linger on my tongue. He gave me a hundred-watt smile in return, clapping me on the back.

"Is that Cullen?" a girl asked shrilly over the music, pushing her way over. I vaguely recognized her as the gum-chewer in the back of my biology class. "Where're the others?"

"Didn't come," the other boy shrugged.

The girl snorted. "Not surprising. They're basically a bunch of recluses."

I frowned at her. "They're just not so keen on parties."

She arched a brow and smirked in my direction. "Only shut-ins avoid a good party like this—that, or people who've got something to hide."

I blinked in surprise and tried to think of something to say, something to lessen the suspicion this girl obviously harbored for my family, but nothing came to mind. Hastily, I clamped up and took another long swig from my can of beer, turning away from the girl, and roaming deeper into the party.

My regret only mounted as I tried to shrug away from some of the curious and suspicious looks students shot at me as I made my way through the rooms. I was obviously _not_ the Cullen they wanted, and even if I was, I was sure the attention would have been much, much worse.

I quickly finished off my can, and chucked it into the bin near the kitchen counter, settling down in a corner between the kitchen doorframe and the living room. I leaned against the wall and blankly watched a sea of teenagers sway to the sound of the stereo console, drinks sloshing in their hands. I sighed and turned to the side, craning my neck toward the window, watching warily as the moon climbed ever-steadily over the night sky.

Why had I even come?

It certainly wasn't for the party. I didn't have any friends here, and I wasn't sure I even wanted to have one. I didn't care about 'fitting in' anymore, especially because we moved around far too often for 'fitting in' to have any real value. What was the point of settling into any one place if you knew you were never going to stay for long? What was the point of getting to know someone you knew you would have to leave behind?

No—I had come because Emmett and Rosalie said I couldn't. I had come because I was seventeen years old, and I just couldn't handle being the only human in a house full of vampires anymore. I had come because maybe just maybe they would notice this time. Maybe they would realize.

"Whoa, Tess?" a voice called, and I looked up abruptly into the dark brown eyes of a stocky boy. It was Chase Woodland—president of the art club and perhaps one of the few people who knew me without the overshadowing presence of my family. "Didn't peg you as the type to come here?"

I shrugged. "School let out. Seemed like the appropriate way to celebrate."

He smiled and shuffled a little closer.

 _Please don't ask where the others are_ , I pleaded softly in my head. _Please let this be a normal conversation._

"So—" he began, "how's the drawing going?"

I relaxed and smiled. "It's good. I'm up to two portfolios now. It's still mostly animals, though. I can't seem to get people right—something about the eyes. I just can't translate it to paper."

He hummed thoughtfully. "Maybe you need to find someone with the right eyes."

I gave him a quizzical look. "It's more about the expression—"

"It's also about the artistic value," he said. "The shape, the shade, the way light hits them, how they—" he paused and his eyes grew sincere, "—change in the moment, and—and—"

"And?"

"You've got real nice eyes," he breathed, and leaned in.

 _Oh,_ I thought as his eyes fluttered shut. _Well—why not?_ I teetered against the cream wall, and pulled Chase toward me, crashing his mouth against mine, savoring the heat of his body and the warmth of his lips. I smiled into the kiss and was just about to pull apart and ask if he wanted to go somewhere else, when I felt his lips ripped away from mine. Cool air washed over me, and I blinked owlishly.

"Wha—"

Emmett was gripping onto my wrist with one hand and lifting up Chase by the front of his shirt with the other. His eyes were dark, and his lips were twisted into a furious scowl as he studied Chase's prone figure.

"Emmett—wait—" I said hurriedly, trying to pull away from Emmett's clasp.

Emmett dropped Chase, and the boy groaned as he hit the floor. Emmett wrenched me forward, shielding me slightly from the eyes of surprised, drunk partygoers, and quickly pushed me outside the house, slamming the door behind him.

"Oh no," I whispered as I caught sight of Rosalie and Edward directly in front of the porch, arms crossed against their chests and matching glares plastered across their faces.

"'Oh no' is right," Rosalie snarled. "What were you thinking? It's nearly midnight—"

"It's not that late," I shot back quickly.

Edward wrinkled his nose. "I can smell the alcohol on your breath."

Well, way to give that away, Edweirdo.

Rosalie's eyes darkened a shade. "Just wait until we get home."

"Whatever," I mumbled, shrugging off Emmett and sauntering away from the trio of vampires. "It's not like you can do any worse."

They caught up to me in an instant, and Emmett cautiously put a hand on my shoulder. "First thing's first—are you okay?"

"Peachy," I grumbled.

"She's fine," Edward answered for me. "Annoyed that you broke up her little makeout session, but still fine."

I set my glare on him. "I am _not_ —"

"Oh, thank goodness!" I heard Esme cry as we neared the front porch of our house. She rushed toward me and enveloped me in a warm, tight hug. "We were so worried, Tess."

"What happened?" Carlisle asked, stepping beyond the threshold of the house as well. "Where was she?"

"Where else? The party we said she couldn't go to," Edward said.

"You could've gone with me," I groused. "If you were worried for me, you could've come, too. They were all expecting you anyway."

"There was a reason why we said you couldn't go, Tess," Rosalie said sternly.

"Yeah—I'm not allowed to have fun, apparently," I muttered, shoving the vampires out of my way and storming into the house.

"Those kids all have it out for us," Rosalie continued from behind me, ignoring my remark. "What would you have done if they spiked your drink? Hurt you?"

Alice and Jasper shot me curious looks as I glumly slid past them and slumped down on the living room couch. I crossed my arms, and looked up at the Cullens' expectant faces. Were they expecting some kind of apology now? Because that sure as hell wasn't happening.

"What's the matter, Tess?" Rosalie asked, tone considerably softer now. She was trying out the latest in a long line of recently researched parenting techniques—compromise. "You've been acting funny ever since your birthday. Is it the upcoming move? We can stay a bit longer if you really want—"

"It's nothing," I bit out, not quite meeting her gaze.

"We've got to talk about this, Tess," Emmett pleaded. "We're trying, champ, we really are. You've got to work with us, too. This isn't a one-way thing. What're you thinking? What're you feeling? What can we do—"

"It's _nothing_."

"You just snuck out of the house to go to some godforsaken party, Tess," Edward snapped. "If you seriously think that's nothing—"

"I don't think you have the right to scold me, Edward," I bit out. "I'm _older than you_."

The entire room fell silent.

"Is that what this is about?" Esme said softly. "There's nothing wrong with growing up, sweetheart. And if it's really bothering you, think about it this way: if you add up all the years Edward's been alive post-transformation, then—"

"That doesn't count," I burst out, leaping from the couch to face the entire family. "It doesn't count because he's still seventeen, and you know it. You all know it."

"Tess," Carlisle began tiredly.

"I want to be a vampire," I said quickly, before Carlisle could even hope to turn around the topic of conversation. "I want to be turned."

A myriad of expressions clouded their faces. Jasper, ever the soldier, was stony faced, but the small crease in his forehead told me he wasn't entirely detached. A small smile graced Alice's lips, which instantly told me that she was on my side. Esme and Carlisle wore matching, wary expressions with sympathetic, indulging smiles. Edward shook his head and grumbled something under his breath, Emmett's eyes widened and he actually took a step back, and Rosalie—

Rosalie didn't move. Not even an inch. She was still as a statue, expect for the quiver of her rosy lips and the faint, damp sheen that was beginning to cloud over her eyes.

"It's not right," I continued. "I—I'm going to turn _eighteen_ soon—"

"That's too young," Esme protested gently.

"Edward is _seventeen_ ," I stressed, and he flinched as I pointed to him. "And I'm nearly past that age. Don't you see? He's seventeen and I'm almost eighteen and for the past twelve years I've thought of him as my _uncle_ , and I'm about to become _older than him_. I—I don't like staying like this—"

"Staying human?" Emmett interrupted. He raised one large hand and ran it through his short, curly hair before letting out a long sigh. "Tess, think about what you're saying here—"

"I _have_ thought about it. I think about it every day, Em." I shifted slightly. "It hurts a little, you know? Because I feel like the older I become—the more _human_ I become—the farther from you I get. I mean—that probably doesn't make sense—but it's like...it's like I'm losing something I have with you guys the longer I put this off." I paused. "I—I don't want to suddenly wake up one day and realize that I'm eighty years older than all of you and on death's door while you're all—while you're all still _you_ ," I finished quietly, my voice nearly a murmur.

"That's not going to happen," Alice said firmly.

My eyes snapped to hers in an instant. "Why? Have you seen it? Did you have a vision?" I asked rapidly.

"Well—" Alice began.

"Hold on a minute," Carlisle interrupted resolutely. "I don't think this particular moment is the right time to be making any rash decisions."

"Why not?" I said indignantly. "There's no time like the present."

Carlisle levelled his stern gaze on me, and I immediately shrunk away a little. "You've just been out partying and drinking, Tess. Most of us are more than a little cross with you. We didn't even finish hunting before rushing back here—"

"Okay, _fine_ ," I said with heavy exasperation. "Then when do you want to pick this up? Tomorrow morning?"

Carlisle glanced around the room cautiously, eyes lingering for a moment on Alice.

"Twenty-one," Carlisle said at last, and I could tell by the firmness in his voice that he had chosen the age a long time ago. "We'll discuss this again when you're twenty-one."

" _Twenty-one?!_ " I spluttered. "That—that's so—"

"It's voting age," Edward cut in. "You're a legal adult then. You can make your own decisions. Sounds fair to me."

My eyes swept around the room, around my family. Twenty-one was far too old. Rosalie, Emmett, Jasper, Alice, Edward—they had _all_ been changed at twenty or younger. The only ones who would still be older than me by my twenty-first birthday would be Carlisle and Esme, and by only a _little_.

Didn't they understand how strange it would feel, how unnerving it would be to eclipse them like that? How estranged and foreign our relationship might get?

"Why not eighteen?" I asked. I stared into Edward's faintly surprised eyes. "That's drafting age. If I'm old enough to fight in war, then I'm old enough to be turned."

"That logic ain't gettin' you anywhere," Jasper said, voice steely. "Carlisle said it best—twenty-one, and we'll discuss again."

Faltering, I turned to Alice. "What do you think?"

"It'll be okay," she said, and smiled.

I closed my eyes briefly and let out a long breath. If Alice was fine by these turn of events, then I supposed I had nothing to really worry about. Alice was on _my_ side, and if she said it was going to be okay, then surely my transformation was going to happen sooner rather than later. No matter what Carlisle and the others had decided on.

"Okay. Fine. Twenty-one. _But_ , I reserve the right to bring this up again before then in case something happens."

Carlisle clapped his hands together. "Good, so we've reached an agreement. We'll discuss again—"

"No," I cut in. "Not discuss. We're not discussing this again. I'll be fully changed when I turn twenty-one. I mean, we're all the same side here, right? I've got to be changed at some point. I'm not going to grow old and die without any of you. It's only a matter of _when_ I'll be changed at this point. And it might as well be twenty-one. I'm not going to get any younger."

Silence met my words. I couldn't tell if the others were surprised by my determination on the matter or pleased or frustrated. If I was being honest, it seemed to be a scattered mix of all three: Alice was smiling, Edward was frowning, and Carlisle was shock-still.

Moments passed without a single word being uttered until, at last, Rosalie spoke:

"You can't," she pleaded. "Please, Tess, you can't do this." Her voice shook, and she walked closer to me, close enough so I could see the clear heartbreak in her light eyes. "It's a fate worse than death. It's—"

"Rosie," I whispered, closing the distance between us and enveloping her into a hug. "If it meant I could be with you forever, of course I would do it. Every time." I locked eyes with Alice from across the room and smiled. "I didn't know that for a long time, but Alice helped me see."

Rosalie wrenched herself away from her and whipped around to face Alice. "You!"

"Rose—" Alice began soothingly, as Jasper moved forward.

"It's all your fault!" Rosalie cried. "Pointing us along every path we needed to take, every house we just _had_ to visit, taking us on that stroll through the woods. We should have gone with Carlisle's plan, Alice, and you _knew_ it. We shouldn't have let it ever get this far. We— _we_ _damned her, Alice!_ "

"Rose," Emmett said softly, putting an arm around her shoulder.

"It doesn't matter which plan we went with," Alice said resolutely. "This would have happened anyway."

"You got greedy," Rosalie said.

"That's _enough_ ," Carlisle said sternly.

I stared incredulously at the stand-off in front of me. Had a new issue suddenly arisen? Or were they still talking about me?

"I don't understand," I said, stepping forward. I glanced at Edward, silently asking him for an explanation.

"It's not mine to give," he answered aloud. "Everyone knows my position—we should have been forthright from the get-go."

"Well, why don't you all be forthright right now?" I crossed my arms and levelled my gaze with Carlisle. "What else are you all hiding?"

"We're not _hiding_ anything," Alice said. She glanced desperately at Carlisle, who simply rubbed his jaw tiredly and turned to his wife. "We're—we just—"

" _You_ just," Rosalie cut in bitterly. "It was all _you_."

"We _all_ agreed, Rosalie," Jasper said, narrowing his eyes at her. "Yourself included."

"Agreed to what?" I asked, my tone growing wary. Was this going to be _another_ life-altering secret? "Why do you guys keep not telling me things? What could possibly be more serious than the fact that you're all vampires? What was Carlisle's plan? What did Alice do? What _happened_?"

My gaze travelled around the room, settling on each face in my family, taking in Jasper's firm expression and Alice's guilty one, Rosalie's watery scowl and Emmett's frown, Edward's pursed lips and Carlisle's contrite grimace, before finally stopping on Esme's heart-shaped, heartbroken face.

This reaction had to be at something beyond my growing desire to be transformed. This had to be because of something that started long before I came along.

"We haven't been…entirely honest," Carlisle said after a while.

"What did you all do?" I repeated, voice hard.

"We knew your parents were going to die in that car crash," Esme said, voice so quiet I almost didn't hear her. "And it's what we _didn't_ do—we didn't save them."

* * *

A/N : this chapter was a bit of a wild ride, and i hope it didn't come out as too choppy. this is kind of the resolution to a minor plot hole (if the Cullens knew Tess was going to be orphaned, why didn't they try to prevent that from ever happening?) and the beginning of a very large rift. i'm sort of splitting up this story into "parts" (which i'm not really labelling or anything): one for tess, one for demetri, etc. we're a bit more than half-way through this first part, so demetri is coming up, i promise! also, thanks for the reviews!


	9. Static

Chapter Nine

 _July, 1965_

Their first instinct was to save my parents, but the moment that decision had been cemented, the very moment Carlisle proposed it and the others agreed, the future changed. After months of persistence, Grandmama would have finally had her way: solitary Forks was no place to raise a child, and Mama was slowly convinced that Papa was not fit to raise me. Mama would have gone back to France, and she would have taken me with her.

This didn't seem so bad until Alice told me the region in France we would have moved to was one that would eventually be visited by a member of the Volturi. And while Alice didn't delve into specifics, I could understand why I would have caught this guardsman's eye. With no discernable scent and the likelihood that the guardsman's power would be impotent against me, I would more likely than not be brought to the Volturi and turned.

I understood all this. I knew they wanted to protect me, and had done so in the best way they could. I understood all this, but I still could not find it in my heart to forgive them. I wasn't sure if it was because they hadn't saved my parents when they could have (even if it only prolonged the inevitable, even if it only brought more sorrow) or because they hid this from me, as they seemed to do with _everything_.

I wondered if there was more that they weren't telling me. It seemed impossible to think any of the Cullens had more secrets, more things to hide. After all, what else could there possibly be?

If being a vampire meant _this_ —meant having to keep secrets from someone you love, meant having to just let some people die—then I didn't know if I wanted to be one anymore.

* * *

 _January, 1966_

"Are you excited, champ?" Emmett asked, grinning down at me. Despite my sudden growth spurt, Emmett still towered above me, and he ruffled my loose blonde hair just to prove it. "We might even see a bear!"

I rolled my eyes and shoved his hand off of my head. "Rosalie would _never_ let me get close to a bear."

"Not even if its a dead bear?"

"You can't take down a grizzly bear," I scoffed, bending down to lace up my boots. "They can weigh up to half a ton, and they are _ruthless_."

"Believe me, I know," Emmett said, and grabbing the pair of hiking sticks sitting by the doorway.

"Besides, it's still winter and any bears around are probably in hibernation," I said matter-of-factly. "You'll probably have to settle for rabbits or foxes."

"Are you two ready yet?" Rosalie asked, entering the living room. Despite the fact she couldn't feel the cold, she was dressed in a puffed-out baby blue peacoat. She raised an eyebrow when she saw I was still without my own coat. "At this rate, we'll reach forest clearing by sundown."

"You guys could always just carry me there with your crazy vampire speed," I reminded her, grabbing my olive coat from the rack.

"But then it wouldn't really be hiking, would it?" Emmett said.

"As if any of us are _really_ hiking," Edward said, strolling in lazily with Jasper following closely behind. They both looked as though they would rather do anything else in the world than babysit me during this hike. "And we all know we're going to get bored watching Tess avoid tripping over rocks halfway through the trip and just carry her up the hillside."

Emmett opened his mouth. "But—"

"Don't even bother saying anything to suggest otherwise, Emmett. I can read your mind."

I laughed, and grabbed the hiking sticks from Emmett's hands before opening the door and stepping foot in the wintry air. Last night's snowfall had covered our backyard so thoroughly that I couldn't make out any of the potted plants or shrubs Esme had placed there since we first moved in. I reached down and cupped a large dose of snow in my mitted hands, carefully sculpting it in my hands.

As soon as Emmett stepped out after me, I turned around and flung the snowball at him, collapsing into a heap of laughter as he blinked in confusion before diving into the snow and collecting his own snowballs.

"N—no!" I gasped, still grinning, as he flung a couple at me. They all missed, and I knew it was only because he was a little afraid they might hit me with a bit too much force. Regardless, I raced into the woodland that our backyard melted into, diving behind one of the snow-capped trees for shelter.

The snowballs stopped after a moment, and I stepped out from my hiding place only to find that Edward had begun pelting Emmett with snowballs.

"No tactic at all," Jasper clucked from behind me.

I started and turned to him. "You really have to stop sneaking up on me."

"You really have to pay better attention to your surroundings," he shot back immediately.

"Yeah, yeah," I said dismissively, gaze returning to the feuding brothers. "So, what's the plan here? Are we going to ambush them? Hit them from above? If I ride on your back, they won't see us coming."

Jasper weighed all these ideas seriously. "How about a classic distraction?"

I grinned. "Okay—but it's your turn to be the distraction."

I gathered as many snowballs as I possibly could, and when Jasper tore across the backyard and collided headfirst with Emmett, I flew in, pelting snowball after snowball at all three of them.

"Traitor!" I heard Jasper call out.

"I should have realized this would happen," Rosalie said as she stepped out as well, now with a pair of gloves that matched her coat. She reached down and sculpted her own perfect little snowball. "Oh, well. If you can't beat them, join them, right?"

Promptly, she threw the snowball at me. It collided lightly with my face, and I spluttered at the cold.

"Oh, come on," I said, swatting off the remaining flakes of snow from the side of my face. "How are you _not_ on my side?"

"Hon, with Jasper on your side, the stacks are kind of uneven."

"You've got _Edward_!"

"Edward's not a good shot," Emmett immediately piped in.

"Hey!" Edward said, and threw another snowball at Emmett.

"Maybe we should actually begin the hike now," Jasper laughed, getting up from the heap of snow he had been thrown into by Emmett.

We did, eventually, decide to begin the hike, but the snowball fight never stopped. Slowly, it turned into a game of stealth. I would bend down to tie my shoelace and stand up with a fresh snowball for Emmett. Edward would help me over a particularly steep incline and smash a snowball in my face as soon as we got over it. For an entire hour I felt like we were the most normal family in the whole world.

And then Jasper stopped.

Somewhere within the thick grove of coniferous trees that surrounded us was a man whistling. I could just hear his own boots crunching against the fresh snow, the wind carrying his melody. Jasper crouched against the thick grove of coniferous trees and grew rigid. I reached for him—confused—but Rosalie stopped me.

The whistling was growing closer, and I didn't know why any of us were still standing here. I looked to my left, and Edward was no longer upright. He was crouching as well, but facing Jasper. And as I looked closer, I realized his lips were moving but no sound was coming out.

"What's—" I began, and everything happened at once.

Jasper snarled and leapt, and Emmett pulled him back instantly. Someone grabbed me and pushed me away, pushed me behind someone better in control, but I could not tear my eyes away from Jasper. His eyes were darker than pitch and he was straining against Emmett, whose brute strength and sheer will were the only thing keeping Jasper from killing and draining the hiker who was less than thirty paces away from us.

* * *

 _May, 1966_

Alice and Jasper were still down South. Rosalie had told me it was because he wanted to visit a couple of old friends of his. And although this lie was harmless and well-intentioned, it still hurt that she didn't believe I could handle the truth. It wasn't said out loud, but I knew—I just knew—that Rosalie was the likeliest reason Jasper was nearly a thousand miles away from us. I could even imagine her voice saying it: _How can I trust you around Tess if you don't have your thirst under control?_

But this didn't matter very much anymore. Rosalie and Emmett weren't with us in Maine, either. They had just finished renewing their vows for what I gathered was the third time and were currently on a third honeymoon in Greece. They called every night, and I sort of wished they would stop because I was running out of excuses to get out of talking to them.

"If you talked to them," Edward's voice began carefully, "then maybe you wouldn't have to come up with such extravagant excuses as 'I think there's a bear outside, maybe I should go see what it wants.'"

I shifted over on the porch as he came to sit besides me. The night air was still and cool and washed over us gently. Under the moonlight, Edward's skin glimmered. My own seemed to glow.

"All Rosalie ever asks is 'is everything okay?'" I huffed. "It's getting a bit repetitive. Every conversation we have has become a thinly veiled facade to see if I've been hurt in anyway."

"She wants to protect you."

"It's getting claustrophobic again."

"Duly noted," Edward hummed. "I'll tell that to her next time I talk to her. Don't be surprised when you see her carry my decapitated head on a stick."

I merely rolled my eyes. "Esme and Carlisle aren't obsessed with making sure I'm alright."

"Esme and Carlisle aren't first-time parents."

I wanted to say that Rosalie and Emmett weren't really my parents—at least, not anymore—but I wasn't sure how to get that sentiment across. They had been my parents, once, but it was all strange now. I was an adult and nearing their age group. They might have been my parents once, but they weren't anymore. They couldn't be anymore, right?

"When Rosalie looks at you, she doesn't see you the way you see yourself," Edward said.

"Not as an adult, you mean."

He shrugged. "She just sees you as her daughter. I don't think she'll ever stop seeing you in that light."

I couldn't fault her for that no matter how much I wanted to, no matter how much I wanted her to let me go so I could have room to breathe again. A silence settled between Edward and me, and I watched the moonlight dapple across the broad leaves of the ficus Esme planted outside. How was everything so still? It seemed like my life was hurtling from one place to another—Oregon to Louisiana to Alabama to Maine—and yet the world remained somehow the same. The nights here were somehow the same as the nights from what seemed to be an entire lifetime ago, somehow the exact same as the nights spent from my small bedroom in Forks.

"Do you still remember them?" Edward's voice was quiet now, subdued. "Your—" he hesitated here, "—other parents?"

"Yeah," I said. My eyes traveled from the foliage up to the moon. It was only half-full but still loomed with a heavy presence. "I still remember them. Not too well, but I remember."

I remembered bits and pieces—snapshots from an old film. I remembered Mama's soft curls, the way her rosy pink lips curled in when she laughed. I remembered Papa's raucous laughter, the way he slapped his hand against his knee when he found something downright hilarious. I remembered a trip to the seaside and collecting seashells with them. Papa had pressed a glossy blue shell into my hand, and I had marveled at how smooth it was I could almost make out my reflection in it. I wanted to find more like them, so I took his broad hand in my small one and led him around the coast, pointing to various locations. He would dig up seashells for me. I couldn't remember what else we found exactly, but I remembered the sea lapping at my toes and gritty sand sticking to my hands and the way Papa spoke—so tenderly, a voice like a summer breeze.

Edward started, and I turned to him. "What is it?"

"I—" he had a frown on his face, and it only grew deeper. "For a moment, I couldn't hear your thoughts."

I snorted and turned away. "Getting rusty, huh?"

"No," he said. "I could hear you for a moment. About going to the beach...and then—"

"And then what?"

"It just kept growing faint. Until I couldn't hear anything else. It was like a signal was dying out."

"Can you hear my thoughts now?" I asked.

"Yeah—"

"Are you sure?" I said. Part of me thought he either just blanked out for a moment or was legitimately going crazy.

"I'm _not_ going crazy! It actually—" he stopped, and frowned once more.

"What is it now? Did my 'thoughts grow faint'?" I mocked.

"No, it's Alice—"

"There's _no way_ you can hear Alice's thoughts from here."

"No! She's on the phone with Carlisle," Edward said, tilting his head toward the front door. "She's—she's panicking—"

The humor dropped from my face, and I leaned toward Edward. "What's happened? Is she okay? Is it Jasper?"

"No—it's nothing about them. Hold on," he said, and listened in some more. "She lost track of your future. She says 'it just went out,' that it was like you didn't even exist for a solid couple of minutes."

I drew away. "I'm guessing this is the same period of time you couldn't hear my thoughts?"

Edward nodded. "They're coming home."

I perked up. "Alice and Jasper?"

"Yeah, Alice is worried now. This has never happened before—" he turned away from the door and back to me, "—not to Alice or me. I think it's freaking her out a bit. She's never _not_ been able to see someone's future."

"I just keep doing weird stuff, huh?" I shifted a bit. With no scent and now this, I was really shaping up to be some kind of anomaly. "I mean, it shouldn't even be that surprising, right? Jasper has never been able to affect me with his power, either."

"That's true, but Jasper's power is physical. And your scent being undetectable—that's physical, too. We all just kind of figured that whatever your power might be, it must be something that's physical. Or that it repulses other physical powers, like a forcefield or something." Edward paused. "But these mental side effects don't really play into that now."

"Maybe I'm like static," I joked half-heartedly. "Maybe my power is that I mess up other people's powers."

Edward hummed thoughtfully. "You _are_ really annoying and distracting…."

"Hey!"

He nudged my shoulder playfully. "Whatever it really is, we'll figure it out."

* * *

A/N : sorry for the long wait! if you're still reading, thank you for sticking around!


	10. Spin

Chapter Ten

 _September, 1967_

"You're sure you'll be okay?" Rosalie asked me worriedly. Her slim fingers tucked stray flyaways of my pale blonde hair behind my ear. "College life is different than high school, Tess. There's more freedom, but with that comes—"

"I'm _fine_ , Rose," I said, stopping her hand with my own.

"Don't mind her," Emmett said, nudging my shoulder. "She's just got empty nest syndrome."

" _Me_?" Rosalie scoffed, turning to Emmett. "Last night you were near _tears_ at the thought of Tess forgetting to call home or deciding not to visit during break."

I laughed at Emmett's sheepish expression. "I'm definitely not going to forget to call home. Besides, you're over in Chestnut Hill—not exactly far from campus."

Despite myself, there was a bitter tinge to my words. It wasn't that I didn't want my family to be close. I certainly wanted them to be near enough that I wouldn't feel their absence profoundly. But eight miles away from Radcliffe seemed a bit too close, if you ask me.

Of course, it could be worse. Rosalie or Alice might have enrolled at Radcliffe along with me. Thankfully, the Cullens tended to stay away from colleges in general. High school was easy for vampires to fool; they were in and out and no one was the wiser. The Cullens were more wary of colleges, because they tended to stay in touch with alumni—reaching out via the post or hosting class reunions.

"Don't worry, hon," Rosalie said, catching onto my discomfort. "We'll only come down to pick you up when you're on break. Besides, we're busy helping Carlisle, so we'll be totally out of your hair."

"Yeah," Emmett said, and a shadow of apprehension passed over his face. "We'll be working."

"It'll be fun," Rosalie said in a half-convinced tone. "We'll be helping people."

"You two are definitely going to quit after the first week," I said breezily.

Emmett immediately straightened up, "Is that a challenge I hear?"

Rosalie groaned. "Oh, no—"

"I'll bet you thirty-five dollars that you'll be out of that hospital within the week," I said, crossing my arms and meeting Emmett's golden eyes with a lofty gaze. "In fact, I'll throw in an _additional_ thirty if you decide to quit because you're tired of washing bedpans."

Emmett nodded thoughtfully. "Alright, and if I last the whole term, then during summer _you've_ got to intern at Carlisle's hospital—"

"There's no way I'm doing that," I cut in. It wasn't the hospital I was worried about. Wheeling patients in and out of the emergency room and helping file away records were all tasks I could handle. What I couldn't handle was Carlisle's _droning_. If it was even remotely related to medicine, Carlisle went on and on like a broken faucet. I couldn't possibly bear an entire summer having him over my shoulder, reciting facts about blood cell count and EKGs by rote.

"Well, then the bet is off…" Emmett trailed, a familiar competitive gleam in his eye.

"There will be _no_ bet," Rosalie said immediately.

"But, Rosie—" Emmett began.

"It's Tess's first day at Radcliffe, and we're not ruining it by talking about the terms and conditions for a new bet." Rosalie turned back to me, and relaxed. "You sure you're going to be okay, Tess? Remember, you can always call if you need anything. You have Esme's number in case of emergencies, right? And Carlisle's hospital's number? And—"

"I'll be fine, Rose," I said, and laughed at the familiar overprotective nature. I would be lying if I said I wasn't a little bit excited to half a whole term to myself, without my family's constant, watchful eyes and hovering. "I've got everyone's numbers."

"Okay," she said, but she still wasn't smiling.

"You guys had better get going, right?" I said, glancing down at my thin wristwatch. It was nearing one o'clock, and I had an orientation in a half hour. "I'll call you later tonight, if you want."

Rosalie nodded immediately, and I saw a glaze overcome her eyes as she pulled me in for one final goodbye hug.

"Don't worry, Rose," I said, patting her back. "I'll be fine."

"I know," she said, but her voice was wavering.

From behind Rosalie, Emmett mouthed, _Bet still on?_

I gave him a subtle thumbs up, and he beamed.

* * *

 _January, 1968_

The spring semester had only just begun, but I was already slowly being crushed by a mountain of homework. The only thing I missed about my family during times like these was their incredible speed. If I could think and move my hands as fast as they could run, I'd have this essay done in less than a minute.

"This is the worst!" Anna said out loud, throwing down her pencil, and laying her head against the lounge table in defeat. "Why do professors always assign tons of homework when we get back? What did we do to deserve this kind of torture, Tess?"

I patted her on the back sympathetically. Anna was in my seminar course, and we were both hurriedly trying to finish up an essay draft that was due by the end of the week.

"We paid for it," I deadpanned.

"I _know_ ," Anna moaned, lifting her head up and resting it on the hilt of her palm. Her short, dark hair clumped up around her hand. "But you would think they'd be at least a little sympathetic, right? Like, I've got work for my _other_ classes, too."

I merely shrugged, and tossed my own pencil on the table, giving up for now. "I think each professor just thinks _their_ class is the most important, you know?"

"If I were a professor, I'd give one assignment per month and grade with a generous curve. I'd hold office hours and give all the students biscuits and tea when they stopped by."

"Everyone would get an A, and you would get fired," I laughed.

"Not if I snatch tenure first," Anna grinned.

"Would you really want to become a professor, though? Like—think about it. You've got to do so much more schooling: a master's, and then a PhD."

"Oh, I definitely wouldn't become a professor," Anna said immediately. She straightened up and leaned back in her chair. "I'm already _dying_ after one semester. imagine doing this for like—what—four? Six more years?" She shuddered. "And undergrad is the absolute worst, 'cause you don't know what you're going to do yet, so you're just cramming all these classes in, exploring all the options. You barely have time to relax and do hobbies you once enjoyed because you're so busy trying to find out what you can do when you get older."

I found myself nodding along to her. "I wish I had all the time in the world to just...figure it out, you know? Like, I could just drift through life and engage in anything that caught my interest. There wouldn't be any pressure like there is now."

My thoughts flew again to the Cullens. That's more or less how they lived their lives. Carlisle had gone through centuries on earth, just learning and learning and learning about anything and everything he could get his hands on.

Anna made a face, wrinkling her nose. "Honestly, I'd hate that, too. There's got to be boundaries. It can't be too little time or too much."

"Why not?" I said. "Who wouldn't want to have eternity to do everything?"

"Eternity is too much time to do everything," Anna said. "Could you imagine? You'd do all the stuff you always wanted to do, spend your time immersing yourself in whatever comes your way. And then, when barely a fraction of time had gone by, you'd be done. There'd be nothing left to do, because you'd done it all. You would spend the rest of your life just trying not to be bored, just flitting from distraction to distraction, endlessly repeating all the things you once found fun until they became boring, too."

I swallowed thickly, and glanced away from her. I stared blankly at the ashy grey of the lounge table. I hated to admit it, but Anna had a point. There was a reason Rosalie and Emmett and the others spent year after year just repeating high school, confined within the four walls of that small classroom. There was a reason we darted from town to town, setting up a new house and new lives that were suspiciously like our old ones—Carlisle as doctor, Esme as home decorator, the kids in school….

When I thought about it the way Anna framed it, it was hard not to think about how still, solitary, and one-dimensional the Cullens' lives were. When you had eternity, where was the hurry? They passed through life like a leaf in a steady breeze, and I was beginning to think that might not be such a great thing.

"I think if you just alternate between the things you have to do and the things you want to do, you'll be basically fine," Anna mused. "That's why I want to travel after I graduate. Then maybe I'll come back and keep going at the books, or settle down or something."

"Travel?" I echoed.

She nodded. "I really want to go to Italy! Could you imagine seeing the Colosseum with your own two eyes? It's on my bucket list."

My brows furrowed. "What's a bucket list?"

"It's like—" she paused thoughtfully. "It's like all the things you want to do before you die. You've never thought about that?"

I didn't know how to tell her that I hadn't exactly planned on dying at all, so I just shook my head.

"Well, it's dead useful, no pun intended," Anna laughed. "Isn't there something you want to do before you die?"

The answer flew from my lips: "Open an art gallery."

Anna's brown eyes beamed. "Now _that's_ a goal. You should totally do that one day."

But how could I if I were changed? It would attract too much attention.

Before I could stop myself, I said, "I'll be twenty-one next year."

Anna looked at me funnily. "So? You don't need to do it before then, just whenever you can."

"No—yeah, I get it," I said, picking up my pencil and deciding to return to my essay.

I stared blankly at the half-filled page of looseleaf as Anna picked up her own pencil with a heavy groan. How could I concentrate on this now? All my thoughts were swirling around my family, and how I had got it all wrong. They weren't free from the constraints of time. They were trapped. They stood still in a world that kept moving, with or without them.

* * *

 _February, 1969_

I would never admit it but I was a little nervous. I had no reason to be, of course. It was only my family. It was only my family and a huge, life-altering decision that I had to make.

Alice rubbed my shoulder consolingly as she came to sit besides me on the couch.

"Have you seen it?" I asked, turning to her.

"I think your head is all in a jumble," Alice said, not quite meeting my eyes. "I haven't been able to see clearly into your future for the past couple of days."

"Oh," I said, and leaned back into the plush couch. My eyes flickered to a close, as I tried to list the pros and cons of becoming a vampire, which was a completely insane task to be undertaking.

Who in their lifetime was ever _presented_ with the choice of becoming a vampire? From all the stories Carlisle and Esme had told me, no vampire had ever really had a choice when it came to their transformation. It was either an act of mercy—like when Carlisle bit Edward during the Spanish Influenza—or an act of power—like when the Volturi collected humans suspected with a gift and bit them with or without their consent.

But here I was, hovering on the cusp of an enormous decision that would change the course of my life.

"No pressure, though," Edward said, strolling into the living room.

I rolled my eyes at him. "Glad to see you could join the party, Edward."

Carlisle clapped his hands together lightly, shifting everyone's attention to him. Esme was right at his side, shifting between watching me tenderly and glancing at the others around the room. Alice was still sitting next to me on the couch, with Jasper behind us. Emmett was hovering near the couch as well, close to me, but also trying to maintain proximity with Rosalie, who was hanging out near the edge of the room.

From what Emmett had explained to me this morning, Rosalie was trying to remain as impartial as possible. Somehow, this translated into Rosalie keeping away from the rest of the family. I wondered if she was trying to sort through all her own thoughts like I was.

"Alright," Carlisle said, and all eyes were on him. Rosalie stopped pacing around in the back, and stood up straight. She was biting her lip furiously, and her eyes were already beginning to glaze over. "We'll just begin with a cursory overview. Let's hear everyone's side and then what Tess thinks at the end. We'll vote afterwards. I believe this is the most fair process—everyone gets a word in, but Tess will have the last say. Any disagreements?"

As expected, no one disagreed.

"Wonderful," Carlisle beamed. His kind, murky brown eyes locked onto my green ones, and he gave me a sympathetic smile. "I'll start, shall I? While I personally don't see the point in inducing the transformation when there is no life-threatening need for it, I'm not against Tess's transformation."

Rosalie turned away. Besides me, Alice relaxed. I simply grew more tense, and my thoughts became even more muddled. There were so many mixed signals in what Carlisle had said. He didn't _want_ to change me, but he _would_? What the hell did that mean exactly?

"I can understand how it might feel for Tess to slowly eclipse more than half of her family in age," Carlisle continued. "It is, as she said a couple of years ago, rather alienating. If transforming would make her feel more comfortable amongst us—and if she truly wants to be transformed—then I believe we should support her in this."

"I'm on the same page," Esme said warmly, reaching for Carlisle's hand. "Tess, if this is what you want, then I'm on your side."

I smiled weakly at her.

"Edward?" Carlisle called.

Edward shrugged, and looked down at the floor. "I just—I'm not sure if you'd want this, Tess. It's a lot more than you think. The thirst is honestly half the battle…." He glanced at me. "I'm sorry, Tess, but I don't think I could vote for this out of good conscience."

Edward's withdrawal of support only added to my growing agitation. This was _Edward_ talking—Edward who bent the rules when I was eleven and snuck me chocolate ice cream when Rosalie wasn't looking! Now he was sticking to the rules, talking about 'good conscience'? Had I really misjudged this whole vampire thing so badly?

"Well, I'm for it," Emmett said, and Rosalie's head whipped to him so fast, she might have broken it were she human. He looked down at me, ruffled my hair, and smiled. "I can't have you getting any older than me, champ. You'll start lording your age over me, and I just can't have that. Besides—if you're a vampire, we can finally have that arm wrestling game."

Although Emmett's words were coated in humor, there was an undercurrent of desperation. We had had this talk before, Emmett and I, and it was less about me getting older and Emmett's growing fear that I might up and die one day.

"I'm for it, too," Jasper said. "Things will just get easier if Tess is changed. We won't have to run from town to town the normal way anymore. There'll be less—" he hesitated, "—worries about thirst."

"And I'm for it, too, so we've got the majority," Alice piped in. "If this is about preserving humanity…well, we did raise Tess till adulthood. She's experienced basically all there is to experience—"

"No, she hasn't," Rosalie snapped, stalking forward. "There's so much in the world, Alice. You don't even know the half of it."

Alice's eyes softened. "I'm sorry, Rose—"

"It doesn't matter," she said briskly. Rosalie turned to me. Her eyes gleamed with tears that she was unable to shed, and her hands fidgeted at her sides. "Tess, I'm sorry, but I'm against it. I know it's not what you want to hear, but the truth is...it's just not worth it. None of this is. I want you to have a long, happy life. I don't want you to be—to be _trapped_ like this, somewhere between living and dying. Food tastes like ash. The thirst constantly lingers. No sunlight. Seclusion from other people. It's not worth it."

Once upon a time, I wanted to be a vampire more than anything. But I had only been a teenager then. Now, I was much older, much more invested in the world. I had to return back to Radcliffe on Monday. If I changed now, my friends would definitely know something was up.

And I had another year before I graduated, so it couldn't be then. And I wanted to open that art gallery one day, so it couldn't really be in the foreseeable future, either. And...if I got successful...perhaps not ever.

"Well, we've heard from everyone," Carlisle said, bringing Rosalie's emotional outburst to a close. "Tess?"

"I—well—" I surveyed the faces that surrounded me. There was a mix of calm, worry, apprehension, excitement, desperation. I swallowed thickly. I could always change my mind, right? "Thanks for the support, everyone...but, you know what? I think Carlisle said it best. There's no _need_ to becoming a vampire at this exact moment." I smiled sheepishly. "I think I'd rather stay human for now. Sorry for wasting your time."

"Oh, you didn't waste anyone's time, sweetheart," Esme said, still smiling softly. "I'm glad you've come to a decision you're comfortable with."

"I'd say she wasted my time, to be honest," Edward said.

I was about to retort, but then Rosalie took me in her arms, and hugged me fiercely. I stood stock still in her embrace for a second before hugging her back tighter, my cheek pressed against hers, my life pressed against hers. I could only imagine what she was feeling—relief? Happiness?

I knew I should have probably felt happy, but I only felt a dull sense of contentment. The past couple of years of my life had been completely devoted to this moment. How many sleepless night had I spent staring up at my shadowy ceiling, trying to figure out how to pitch my transformation to my family? How many days had spun by with me imagining what it would be like to go to sleep as a human one day and wake up as a vampire the next?

The moment had finally come, and I had simply watched it pass by. I didn't know if I made the right decision or the wrong one, but it was a decision. I was glad the weight was off my shoulders, that some understanding had been reached. And although I was looking forward toward my future and what it held for me, a small seed of reluctance rested in my head. I just wasn't sure if I was missing out on something or not.

* * *

A/N : sorry for the late update; i was absolutely swamped due to finals, but now i'm finally free! i know this chapter might have been a bit boring (it was a bit of a filler chapter), but i promise things are really going to speed up next chapter and onward. also, thank you to everyone who left me reviews! they're very encouraging! :)

and, thank you so, so much **peterbutter** for the kind review! i'm so glad you're enjoying the story and tess so far! demetri is definitely coming in about five chapters, and i hope you'll like the way i've characterized him :)


	11. Sorry

Chapter Eleven

 _July, 1969_

"Unbelievable," Jasper breathed. His amber eyes were glued to the small television screen in front of him, watching with clear disbelief as the Apollo 11—clouded by smoke and fire—rose from the earth. "It can't make it to the moon, can it? They tried before, right?"

I shook my head, and my gaze wandered from the TV set to the large windows that framed the side of the large colonial house Esme recently bought. It was still in Chestnut Hill, which made it easy for me to visit from Radcliffe whenever I had enough time to spare, but in a completely different neighborhood. This one was far less populated, with opulent houses spread out from each other with at least a mile in between, so there was no chance of any of the Cullens being seen unless they absolutely wanted to be. And this was good, because Emmett had told me that the few neighbors they had interacted with in the previous neighborhood had begun to get gossipy. In particular, a nasty rumor that Carlisle was starting a cult was beginning to gain traction.

"Yeah, and that was _your_ fault," Edward grumbled. He was leaned against the open entrance between the living room and kitchen, half-listening to the broadcast of Apollo 11 and half-reading some tragic romance novel Alice bought him for his birthday.

"Okay, I _may_ or may _not_ have added to the rumor. _But_ ," I added hastily when Edward raised a brow, "in my defense, I didn't realize that that group of middle-aged women who jog around the cul-de-sac would actually take me seriously."

Edward rolled his eyes and returned to scanning the book. He kept flipping through pages so quickly, I wondered if he was actually reading or just trying to figure out how it ended.

"I'm a vampire, Tess," Edward said in a deadpan without looking up. "I can read really quickly. It's part of the power."

"What a lame superpower you have," I snorted. "'Hi, my name's Edward and I have the ability to _read fast_ —"

"Well I'll be—it actually launched," Jasper interrupted. He had risen from the couch, gaping at the TV in pure shock. "It's gone!"

I followed his line of sight. I wasn't entirely sure if the rocket had actually launched or if it had just become so thoroughly obscured by steam and smoke that it just seemed to have left the atmosphere.

"Jasper," I sighed, "you do know they've already sent people up into space? It's just the moon that's going to be first."

" _What_?"

"Seriously?" Edward scoffed. "You really missed this whole space race thing?"

" _Space race_?" Jasper cried out. "With whom?"

"With whom?" I repeated. "Where have you been, Jasper?"

"No one tells me anything!"

"Yeah, but—" I began and then immediately dropped it. He was kind of right. No one ever did tell him anything. I supposed it had something to do with the fact that calm, collected Jasper always just _seemed_ like he knew everything already. "Well, don't you read the paper, Jasper?"

"Do _you_ read newspapers?" he shot back immediately.

I faltered. "No."

"How do you find out about all this, then?" Jasper asked, and there was an unmistakable hint of smugness in his tone.

"I—" I looked away and sighed deeply. "I hear about it from other people."

"See!" Jasper threw his hands up. "And _no one_ tells me—"

"Fine, Jasper," I said. "Next time I see you, I'll update you on all the world's happenings. Happy?"

"Not particularly—"

"Would it kill you two to be quiet?" Edward said, snapping his book shut.

"Yes," Jasper and I said together.

Edward grumbled something about how we were like twelve-year-olds, and sulked out of the living room, presumably to go upstairs and play some recordings of depressing classical music.

"I can _hear_ you!" Edward shouted from down the hall.

"Then stop listening to my thoughts!" I yelled back, chuckling softly as I heard Edward growl in frustration.

I relaxed back onto the sofa and turned my attention back to the TV screen. It was still all smoke and steam, although it was beginning to clear away.

"Do you think they'll actually make it?" Jasper asked softly, eyes returning to the scene as well.

He sounded desperate for it, although I couldn't tell why. I wondered, suddenly, if Jasper's detachedness from human affairs wasn't just because nobody talked to him about them but because it was a little too painful for him to look into it himself. His power certainly suggested it.

"Ten bucks says they will," I said after a moment.

"You're on."

* * *

 _May, 1970_

"Oh, I like this one very much," Esme gushed, gazing at a charcoal piece of mine. It was the isolated Cullens estate, although no one would have ever figured that. I drew it during the dead of winter, when the snow covered mostly everything, and all that was really discernible were the tall pine trees, large rocks, and a generic colonial manor.

It was one of my favorite pieces, too, because it was the only one that was remotely connected to my family. All the other pieces for the Radcliffe-sponsored art show—twelve in total from me—were profiles of classmates or abstract paintings. There was a good reason behind this, of course. I couldn't have portraits of anyone in the family, because, at the end of the show, all the pieces would be given away and it wouldn't be very good if there were pictures of never-aging vampires in circulation.

So, I had to settle with these pieces, which was fine.

What was less fine was the art show itself. I had never quite realized how many people expected the artist to talk. I expected people to pass by my artwork, stare at it, maybe comment on it, and move on. But when they saw me standing nearby, with my name tag that so clearly showed I was the artist, they inevitably pulled me into some kind of conversation, asking if I was inspired by this or that, or had read this or that and if it had factored into the shade I used.

It was maddening! If I had known it was going to be like this, then I would have handed off my portfolio to the director and never actually come to the show itself.

"And the light here is simply gorgeous," Esme continued as she moved onto the next piece: a portrait of my roommate, Anna. She was by the window, and the spots where the dappled light struck her dark hair made it shine. Esme leaned in closer. "Your brushwork is absolutely amazing, dear. The detail is so minute. You've worked so hard, and I'm so proud!"

"Thanks, Esme," I said, grinning. "You do realize that's about the twentieth time you've said that, right?"

"I'll say it twenty more times if I have to!"

I chuckled, and was about to move back to my station, when I noticed a couple peering at a painting of an oblivious duck floating down a stream that was turning into a waterfall. It was one of the paintings I was getting the most questions on. People kept trying to ask about the symbolism behind it, and I had given some flustered answer about the pitfalls of life, but the truth was it was just a weird dream.

I could tell they wanted to talk to the artist, so I hid behind Esme for a bit until they passed. This proved to be kind of a strange sight, because I was actually taller than Esme. Thankfully, Emmett lumbered over soon, and I could hide behind him with no problem.

"I've never wished I could eat more," Emmett said desperately, eyeing the hors d'oeuvres spread out at a table in front of the opposite wall. They didn't look particularly delicious, just fancy: complementary cucumber sandwiches, little cakes, and a large croquembouche in the center.

"We'll find you a nice fox after this," Rosalie promised, coming up next to me.

"Rosalie," Esme scolded, dropping her voice to a whisper, "don't say that so loudly!"

"It's fine," I shrugged. "All these people are so strange. They probably think Rose is just talking about some fancy, exotic dish."

Emmett laughed, but Rosalie and Esme tutted at me.

"How much longer is this show?" Emmett asked curiously after his laughter died down. There were more people pouring in now, probably because some other event had just ended. "It's already been a couple of hours."

"They've got it on display all day, I think." I watched a new group of passersby warrily. They stopped by the duck painting, chattering earnestly. "We could leave though, if you want."

"No, no!" Rosalie said immediately. "No, it's your big day, hon. None of us would miss this for the world, _isn't that right, Emmett_?"

"No—yeah!" Emmett said, eyes growing wide. "I didn't mean I wanted to leave. I was just wondering, is all."

But I knew Emmett was growing bored, and I couldn't exactly doubt him. He had seen all twelve of my pieces, clapped me on the back, and proclaimed—in his trademark booming voice—me as the absolute best artist Radcliffe had ever seen (much to some other students' chagrin). That had been nearly an hour and a half go, when we were all still giddy about the new show. Now, at least for me, the sheen of it was beginning to wear off.

It had been nice, at first, watching people look at my art and actually like it. But that was about all I had actually liked—seeing my artwork appreciated. I didn't want the questions, didn't want Emmett's loud and public approval.

I was content to just sit by and watch. It would have been enough if only Rosalie, Emmett, and Esme had seen my artwork, too.

"No, it's fine," I said easily. "I'm getting really hungry anyway. We could stop by somewhere so I could get something to eat and then hang out a bit somewhere? After that, I've got to head back to my dorm. I've got a paper I need to finish."

Rosalie's face held faint lines of worry. "Are you sure? We don't mind sticking around some more, Tess. You've been looking forward to this—"

My stomach growled audibly, and I pointed down at it. "My hunger is greater than my need to sit around and watch people look at art, Rose."

She smiled and shook her head when Emmett let out another great roar of a laugh. We walked out all together, Emmett with his arm slung around Rosalie, Esme chattering about how she could use me to help paint floral designs for a new home she was renovating. I smiled and laughed and chatted with them, all the while trying to ignore the sinking feeling that this whole art show had been something of a waste.

I had got it wrong. I wasn't looking for my art to be put on display for the world. I wasn't looking for fame or recognition or anything like that. I was looking for something else, but I wasn't sure what it was yet.

* * *

 _March, 1971_

"Stop sulking in the corner," Anna laughed as she came over to me. She was carrying two bottles of beer, and I swiped one from her once she was in arm's reach.

"Thanks," I said, guzzling down nearly half of it at once. "And I'm _not_ sulking. I'm _bored_."

Anna had invited me to one of her friend's house parties, and it was the least exciting thing I had ever done in my life. Granted, my idea of exciting was hanging out with seven vampires. But this party was dull even for parties. The house was cramped and certain areas were off-limits, so all fifty or so guests were cramped between the living room and kitchen. There was some bland music playing, and some people dancing blandly to said music. The food hadn't even arrived yet, so almost everyone was just getting sloshed on booze to stave off the growing hunger.

"You're right," Anna sighed, taking a swig of her bottle as well. She gagged at the taste and set it aside. "Jen and Mica aren't having a good time, either." She raised her bottle to the two friends we had dragged here; they were brooding at the opposite corner.

As soon as Jen locked eyes with Anna, she grabbed Mica by the wrist and dragged him over to us. Mica was nursing a whole bottle of rosé in his free hand.

"Where did you get _wine_?" I asked incredulously.

He shrugged. "It was just in the fridge. It's the only good refreshment here." He set the entire bottle down on the kitchen island, and brushed back his dark curly hair from his face. "Am I the only one who thinks we should leave?"

"You're definitely not," Jen said. Her copper skin gleamed under the harsh fluorescent light. "This night is a bust. We should have gone to _my_ place and played board games. I would have ordered pizza."

Anna and I glanced at each other. The only reason we had vetoed that plan was because Jen and Mica were a formidable team when it came to games, and Anna and I were getting tired of losing. But, I would be lying if I said a pizza night didn't appeal to me.

"We could still go," I said.

Jen beamed. "Yes!"

"Can I bring the rosé?" Mica asked.

"Oh, _fine_ ," Anna said. "But you've got to let us win once, Jen. That way I can feel better about myself."

"Oh, we'll see," Jen said, but she was smirking and I was almost one hundred percent sure she would never let us beat her.

That was perfectly fine. Pizza was better than winning anyway.

We all scurried through the tight crowd of people, Mica desperately hiding his stolen bottle of wine underneath his sweater. As soon as we were out, he took it out and took a great gulp.

"You're definitely not driving," I told him.

"I had one sip of that awful beer," Anna said, grabbing Jen's keys, "so I'm the one who'll have to drive you drunk clowns."

"I'm not drunk," I protested. "Just a little—"

Someone from behind us let out a loud holler, causing us to jump. I looked back, and saw a blond-haired boy leap onto a grey car with silver decals on the back. He was followed by two others who were laughing like this was the funniest goddamn thing they'd ever seen in their lives.

Mica scampered into the backseat of the car, and Jen followed to sit besides him. I took shotgun, and Anna entered in afterwards. She started the ignition and winced when the boys outside let out another large whoop.

"The alcohol just goes straight to their brains, I think," Jen said as Anna took off.

"This is why I drink rosé," Mica said seriously. "It's a sensible drink."

"Well, at least you can still form a coherent sentence," I complimented.

" _Don't_ spill that," Jen warned Mica, keeping a close eye on the bottle he clutched preciously in both his hands. "It'll ruin the upholstery."

Mica scoffed. "I'm twenty-two, Jen. I don't just _spill_ drinks—"

"If you spill that, you have to pay to get the stains out—"

"It's _rosé_ ; it won't _stain_ —"

I shifted my gaze to the window and tried to tune out Mica and Jen's arguing. My eyes traced over the distant trees and hills. The one thing I hated about being at the heart of the city was the fact that I couldn't just walk ten feet and suddenly be in the forest for a hike or a grassy clearing for some peace and quiet.

I supposed after I graduated come May, I could move back in with my family and enjoy the quiet seclusion that their lives granted. Hopefully they weren't planning on moving to the other side of the country or something, because that would be a little difficult to explain to my friends.

"Hey…" Mica said, capping his bottle. He was looking out his side window, craning his neck to watch something approaching from behind. "That was the car we saw when we left, right?"

I drew my eyes away from the landscape and looked back, too. Sure enough, it was the grey car we had seen those three boys howling around. I hadn't seen it pull out when we left, but it was here now, careening from side to side in a way that announced with absolute certainty that the driver was not sober.

"Should I pull over?" Anna asked, glancing to me.

"I don't know…" I said slowly. The grey car had slowed down, and disappeared from my view. I twisted around, looking out from the back window. "I think they want to overtake us. Move left a bit and let them go?"

She did just that, and as soon as she did, the other car roared forward, swerving dangerously. It was a miracle it hadn't already collided with one of the parked cars along the oneway.

"Fuck," was all Mica said, because it didn't seem the car could get ahead of us without hitting us.

"Swerve up!" I urged loudly, because I would not, could not, let this happen again. "There's an empty driveway, maybe—"

Anna's hands were taut on the steering wheel, and her foot was pressed on the gas pedal so forcefully I thought she might break it. She pulled up sharply, and my view of the other car was eclipsed completely.

"It's still—!" Jen yelled out frantically, but it was too late.

I did not see the car at all, but I felt its impact a second later when it collided roughly into the driver's side. It was like an earthquake: for one, terrifying moment the entire world shook and shattered, and then all was silent and dark.

When I came to, my head rang with the impact. I was dizzy from the collision, and I could not make out anything. It was as though my sight were clouded, like the world was under some foggy lens. The car was upturned, I thought, because my head was pressed against something very solid, and my legs were bent down strangely. I tried to turn myself, tried to wriggle lose, but the moment I so much as twitched my arm, I felt a horrible pain race through me. I cried out, and heard a distant groan come from somewhere else in response.

"An—na…?" I called out desperately. My voice was hoarse and scratchy, and it hurt to even use it.

No one responded, and the quiet groan from behind subsided. It was getting harder to breathe now, and the pain that had once been latent in my arms and legs was now growing stronger and stronger.

"Jen…Mi—ca…" I tried again, but my voice was so faint and weak I doubted they could hear me at all.

I was still alive, so the others must have been as well—just too hurt to show it. I bit back another scream as I shifted around again. My fingers fumbled in the dark, trying to find the seat belt buckle. If I could just let myself loose and crawl out, maybe I could find help, maybe I could….

But when my hand pressed down against the metal, a sharp pain overtook my wrist, and I let out a short cry. My hand slipped away, and tears stung at my eyes. My heart sunk deeper and deeper in my chest, and I let the tears flow freely now. I was scared, so desperately, helplessly scared.

This couldn't happen again; I couldn't let it happen again.

"An—" My voice broke.

I couldn't see anyone, couldn't tell if Anna was even there, still.

"Help…."

And as soon as I said it, the car was lifted upright and flipped over. Another groan tore from my lips as my weight was redistributed. I landed roughly on my legs, and something snapped. My throat was so torn and I was so dizzy, I couldn't even summon the strength to scream.

The side of the car was ripped open, and the cool outside air washed over me. I trembled under it. My eyes blinked up, but I couldn't make out anything but vague distorted shapes.

"Tess—Tess—" someone called out. It wasn't from anyone in the car.

"—behind and get help—" someone else said.

"Tess…" the voice from before murmured, and I was picked up.

It hurt to be lifted. I mumbled something, or perhaps just moaned. There was so much pain in my body that every time I flinched, every time I was moved, the parts of me that were broken and bleeding seemed to break and bleed all over again. Each old wound seemed to become a fresh one. Rest was impossible. Escape was unimaginable.

We surged forward, my carrier and me, and the wind whistled against my ears. We moved fast, and my arms and legs ached from the force of it.

"Hold on—" the voice was panicked. It was distorted, one syllable was too loud and the other too quiet. It was rushed, too rushed for me really understand what it was the speaker was saying. "He's—Carlisle's coming—"

Whoever was carrying me bolted to the left suddenly, and another wave of pain crashed over me. A strangled, involuntary cry tore from my lips, and the arms under my body tensed.

"There's so much blood," someone else said. The voice was deep, heartbroken. "You—you've got to do it, Rose—"

"I can't—Carlisle is—"

Trees blurred all around us, and soon it seemed like it was just shadows merging into other shadows. There was a darkness that tinged the corners of my vision, and it seemed like the world was separating itself from me, like it wanted to tear itself from me. The trees—or where they even trees anymore?—kept coming, and the dark kept growing, and finally I decided to just shut my eyes.

"—if Alice has even reached him yet. Rose, you _need_ to—"

That's right. It was Rosalie who was with me. It was Rosalie who was always with me. I wanted to tell her something, but I could hardly move, couldn't even bear being jostled. I needed to tell her so much, needed to let her know how I hadn't meant those fights when I was younger, how much I appreciated her looking out for me. I needed her to _know_ —

 _Rosie_. I mouthed it, but I was not even sure if my lips moved. I couldn't feel my face anymore, only my eyes, which stung. I hoped she could see, hoped that she knew the words in my heart better than I did. _Em_ ….

I was afraid. My eyes flickered, then rested. I wanted to see their faces one last time. They knew, right? They had to know.

 _I love you_.

"Tess, don't close your eyes! You've got to stay awake, hon, you've got to—"

"Rose—!"

We came to a standstill. I wanted to open my eyes again, but suddenly the idea of even opening them seemed impossible. Everything about me felt so leaden, so heavy. My eyelids were as weighty as boulders, and I could not imagine ever summoning the strength needed to lift them.

It was so much easier to keep them closed. It was so ridiculously easy to just let the trees become shadows become dark.

A cool hand touched my neck, and I shivered. It was meant to be gentle, but it hurt. My body ached against it. To touch meant to expect a reaction, and my body could not summon one. To touch meant to feel the touch, and it hurt to feel.

"I'm sorry," someone's voice said—Rosalie's or Emmett's or both—and I heard it but it was only sound without meaning.

Something sharp and wicked pressed itself against me, and it stayed there for several seconds. I was tense at first, but as the sharp thing kept itself pressed against my flesh—hard enough to make its presence known but soft enough not to cut—I began to accept it as some part of me. I did not know what was happening, only wanted to lay down and rest forever and forever, until my pain began so thoroughly a part of me that I would not feel it anymore.

But then the sharp thing pressed down against me viciously, and I grunted as it pierced my skin. Something warm swept down my neck. This was nothing compared to what I felt milliseconds after the crash, but it hurt all the same, and I wanted it to stop. I did not want a new wound.

But it did not stop, and the sharpness pressed deeper and deeper, until I thought it might come out of the other side of me.

"Rose, stop—!"

The sharpness was pulled out of me, and I thought it might have pulled some of me out of myself. I felt emptier, now, felt weaker, like I wasn't in myself anymore. It was just the pain, maybe, which throbbed and thrummed all over my body like a ceaseless torrent. I could not feel my arms anymore, could not remember if I had legs or, if I did have them, ever used them. I did not want a body anymore. I did not want anything that could hurt me like this.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry—"

What was sorry? It sounded slick and wet.

The spot where my skin had been pierced began to fester, demanded my attention, and I lent it. It began to tingle, and it distracted me from the greater pain for a moment. But then it became the greater pain. It was like someone had pressed a flame against my skin, and I wondered if I had hallucinated those voices, those arms that carried me. Maybe I had never left that crash. Maybe the car had combusted, and I was slowly being set aflame.

"—Oh, Tess—I'm sorry, I'm—I'm so sorry—"

The spot seared, as though someone had pressed a hot poker into my skin. The dullness that had occupied me earlier, the shadows, began to disappear. The pain was so clear cut now, so very real. It demanded to be known, demanded to be felt. The fire traveled from neck down my throat and into my heart. It was warm at first, and a part of me thought I was being doused in a very hot bath for a moment.

But then it got warmer and warmer, and my heart did not feel very much like a heart anymore. It felt like a great candle had been set alight in my chest, and it was burning me down from the inside out. There was a wildfire in my chest, and it was only growing larger. It caged my heart, scorched my soul, and I needed to let it out somehow.

My throat was raw and burned bright. I opened my mouth and screamed.

* * *

 _A/N : i'm not particularly proud of this chapter, because i feel like the beginning is super choppy; but, i really wanted to just get this chapter out, so i hoped you liked it anyway! and just fyi demetri is coming in like two chapters i promise_


	12. Unseen

Chapter Twelve

They didn't want to tell me Anna was dead.

Carlisle had whispered the news to Rosalie while she sat at my bedside. She decided to wait until my transformation was over—perhaps even a couple of days after that—before relaying the aftermath of the crash to me. They didn't know I could hear their whispers now, discern the darkest of shadows that coated their words. They didn't know the venom had spread so quickly and thoroughly through my system that I could hear the shift of the breeze from the open window, the hum of a single fly's paper-thin wings.

It was maddening. The fire burned through me like I was made of nothing but kindle, the air swelled around me, the smallest of noises tortured me. I could feel dust motes trace over my forehead—or perhaps that was Rosalie brushing away stray hairs.

But as terrible as the transformation was, I did not want it to end. If it ended, then my future was cemented, then my state would be like that of a rock—permanent, unchangeable. And I wanted to change, I wanted to be human, at least for a little while longer. I wanted—

I wanted to cry.

But I was already too far gone, and every time I thought about the crash, however long ago it might have been, I thought about Anna. I thought about her voice, the sharp turn of the steering wheel, the way I had called and called for her and heard nothing in response. Tears would prick my eyes—or something like tears, because they would not fall. It was thicker than a tear, viscous and heavy and not made for mourning. They clung to my eyes like glue and refused to fall. I was stuck with my grief.

And this was how I transformed: with my eyes shut tight, my hands balled into fists, trying to cry and failing. Rosalie was always besides me, or across from me, or at the end of the room, talking to Emmett or Esme or anyone else who had decided to visit. She never stopped apologizing, not once. She would stop for a breath, or just to let the silence give her words meaning again, and then start all over again.

It must have been nearly a hundred thousand 'sorrys' later when the pain began to wean. The last of the venom was concentrated at the ends of my limbs—my feet and hands—and even that was beginning to fade away. My eyes snapped open, and, for the first time since the crash, I could think clearly. More than that, I could _see_ clearly. The air was so still and fragile. I could see dust motes drift lazily in the atmosphere. I could make out the fibrous patterns in the wooden frame of the door opposite me.

"Oh, Tess—!" Rosalie's voice was torn between remorse and joy.

I felt her wrap her arms around me from the side, and I turned into her hug. I relaxed into her hug, and a new onslaught of regret and bereavement hit me. I felt the venom build up in my eyes. I squeezed my eyes shut and wrapped my own arms around Rosalie, hugging her tight.

"I'm so glad you're awake," Rosalie said. Her voice was strained.

"Me too," I said, and let her go. She seemed faintly pained. "Are you okay?"

"Yes—it's just…your grip is kind of strong."

I simply stared at her. _My_ grip was strong? Strong enough to have hurt Rosalie while I was giving her a _hug_? I closed my eyes once more, and pressed the hilt of my palms against them. My flesh didn't feel very cold. In fact, it seemed like it was the same temperature from before I was turned.

Everything about me seemed the same: the way I moved, the way I talked. Living with the Cullens all this while had made me think that becoming a vampire was like turning into marble. I had thought there was a certain stiffness endemic to vampirism, a certain coldness. But nothing had really changed...except, of course, for the fact that I was now gifted immense strength and power.

I had hurt _Rosalie_. In any other situation, I might have laughed at the sheer absurdity of it. But not today.

What a pyrrhic thing this immortality was. What a price I paid for it.

"Come on." Rosalie's voice was so soft. She had one arm around my shoulders. "Do you want to see everyone? They'll be excited to know you're up."

I opened my eyes, and was astounded yet again at the sheer strength of my sight. I could see the fibers in Rosalie's golden irises.

"I'm sure they already know," I said, but got up anyway and followed Rosalie out the door.

As soon as we were out the door, I realized we weren't in our old manor in Cherry Hill. This was a different house, and recently moved into, judging by the lack of decor or furniture. Rosalie, Emmett, and the others must have switched locations as soon as my transformation had begun.

I followed Rosalie down a set of spiral stairs into the foyer. Esme reached me first, and pulled me into a warm hug. I was careful with the way I hugged her back, and when she pulled away, she was beaming and I was relieved I hadn't inadvertently hurt her.

"Hi, Esme," I said, somewhat shyly.

"Hello, dear," she said, and smoothed back my hair with her hand. Her skin wasn't chilled anymore; it felt normal to me.

Emmett was right behind Esme, and he grinned fully, giving me what would have most likely been a bone-crushing embrace for anyone else but felt like a normal hug to me. My eyes flitted over everyone else: Edward was lounging on the sofa with Jasper. Alice and Carlisle were missing.

"Where's—?" I began.

"Alice and Carlisle are...busy," Edward said, and his eyes shifted to Esme.

Esme, in turn, looked to Rosalie, who sighed heavily. Rosalie turned to me and said, "Tess, hon, I'm sorry—I don't know how to say this any other way, but your friend, Anna—"

My throat felt like it was closing in on itself. "I know, Rose. I know."

I hated how beautifully the words came out. I wanted them to be hoarse and cracked, wracked with guilt and grief. But instead they sounded like notes from a wind chime—incapable of containing sorrow, of anything that wasn't merry. Somehow, this realization made me feel even more pathetic, made me want to cry even more, made me want to release all the pain I had holed up into my heart ever since my transformation began. But I could not, so it sat heavily in my chest.

Until it didn't.

A wave of calm washed over me, and it took away all the sadness with it. My mind cleared, the tightness from my throat disappeared. It was all right; everything was peace and—

"What the _fuck_?" I said, reeling. I wasn't feeling what I felt anymore; it was like a switch had been turned off.

"Sorry," Jasper said immediately, and the calm receded. "I thought you needed it."

I stared at him. " _You_ did that? What—how—"

"That's his power, hon," Rosalie explained.

"Power?" I repeated, and frowned. "But his power doesn't work on me. That's what you told me, right?"

"It takes newborns time to adjust," Jasper said softly and clearly. "It was your innate power that staved mine off when you were human. Now that you've been changed, it might take some time for your power to come out."

"Oh, what kind of garbage is _this_ ," I complained. "Fate's got some sense of humor. I become a vampire in the worst way imaginable, and the _only_ part of becoming a vampire I was actually looking forward to—my power—isn't even there."

"It might reveal itself soon," Rosalie said.

"I wouldn't be surprised if I didn't have a power at all," I sighed. "That's just the kind of twist my life would throw at me."

"That's hardly likely—" Rosalie began.

Edward shrugged and interrupted: "She might have a point. She has a scent now."

Rosalie's eyes narrowed at Edward. " _Not. Helping_."

"I've got a scent, too?" I said dispassionately. "What is it? Death and decay? Rotting corpses?"

"Scents don't stick to venom as well as they do to blood," Edward said. "So the scent of most vampires is rather faint. Yours is...kind of strong."

"Thanks, Edward," I ground out in frustration. "I was really looking forward to hearing you trash me—"

"You don't smell _bad_ ," Edward defended himself immediately. "You smell like a garden. It's like you took a bath in flowers."

I was a walking bouquet. Fantastic.

Edward snorted from the couch, and I narrowed my eyes at him before returning my gaze to Rosalie. "So, where exactly is Alice and Carlisle, then? Are they doing something in Cherry Hill? Is that why you mentioned Anna?"

"Carlisle had to, well, fake your death, basically," Rosalie said somewhat sheepishly, "since Emmett and I had taken your body from the crash site and transformed you. Alice stayed behind to assist with authorities and the university, handle the finer details."

"Oh," I said. "And where are we now?"

"Maine," Esme piped in. "Luckily, I had already begun setting up for our next home. Emmett and Rosalie brought you hear immediately. The rest of us came gradually, so as now to arouse suspicion."

"Right," I looked back to Rosalie. "Well—I've got to go back to Cherry Hill."

Rosalie's brows furrowed. "Why?"

"For Anna's funeral," I said softly.

* * *

 _April, 1971_

As it turned out, attending Anna's funeral was far more controversial than I thought it would be. And, surprisingly, it was Carlisle—and only Carlisle—who was opposed.

I understood where he was coming from. I had been turned less than a month ago, and had not so much as smelled a human being since my transformation. Carlisle was reluctant to let me into the public eye until a year had passed, until I was no longer a newborn. His reasoning was that he "knew me," knew how impulsive I could be, knew how stubborn I could get. He was afraid that my attending Anna's funeral might turn it into a massacre.

And the city we had decided to settle into in Maine—Rockport—wasn't a very good place for rearing a newborn. The more wooded areas were nearly five miles from the house Esme had bought. (In Esme's defense, although the manors that were actually near the woods were technically unused, they belonged to old families who had no intention of selling any time soon.) So, I couldn't even leave to hunt, couldn't adjust myself to my newfound vampirism in the forest, because I might stumble upon a human on the way there. Carlisle hadn't even been able to swipe any donated blood from his old hospital for me, and he needed to keep a low profile for a couple more weeks before applying for a new position at the general hospital here in Rockport. So for the past couple of days, I had been subsisting on rabbits and other rodents Rosalie caught and listening to Carlisle fret over whether or not to let me leave the house.

After a couple of days of fierce yelling on my end and calm explanation on Carlisle's end, we came to an agreement at long last. It was decided that I would attend Anna's funeral on the strict condition that I do not breath. Jasper and Rosalie would be coming with me. Jasper had to be there, because he was apparently the only one who might be able to handle my newborn strength and restrain me should I delve into a bloodcrazed frenzy. Rosalie was there to keep Jasper in check and stop us from goofing off, which was understandable.

We ran to Massachusetts, Rosalie besides me, Jasper right behind me.

It was strange not breathing at first. Once in a while, my brain would confuse itself and think I was human again, and I would panic for approximately a millisecond because I hadn't taken a fresh breath of air in quite some time. Fortunately, before I could break my _sworn oath_ to Carlisle, I'd remember that I didn't have to breathe anymore.

After about an hour and a half of not breathing, I forgot about it completely. It felt almost natural not to breathe, and I wondered if I had ever really breathed before I was transformed. I couldn't really remember what it meant to breathe, why I had to do it.

What I _didn't_ forget about after an hour and a half of running was the aura of calm Jasper was inducing. Never in my life had I felt so pacified, so at ease, and I was constantly caught between slipping into the bind of his gift and revolting against the illusion. It was irritating, to say the least, but Carlisle had felt it was a good way to keep me docile should I slip up and accidentally smell some person's blood.

We arrived back at Cherry Hill at dawn, and loitered around the site of the funeral for a couple of hours before deciding to find a place where we could discreetly observe the proceedings. I voted for Rosalie to buy us disguises so that we could blend into the crowd, albeit at a distance. Jasper voted to hide in a tree.

We hid in a tree.

"This is dumb," I complained, grumbling for about the thousandth time as I angrily snapped the branch in front of me so I could get a better view. "It's uncomfortable, and what if someone looks up? They're going to see three people in a tree."

"No one ever looks up," Jasper promised.

I looked to Rosalie, who merely shrugged. I shifted once more in the tree, leaning against another branch and looking down at the small crowd of people that had gathered. My eyes scanned over them. I saw Anna's parents at the front, near the casket. Her father was stony-faced but her mother was red-eyed and her lips were trembling. I swallowed thickly, and looked away to the stragglers in the back.

I leaned forward as I caught sight of Mica and Jen. Mica looked fine, save for some minor cuts on his face. Jen's left wrist was in a cast, and her dark, somber eyes swept over the gathering. I wasn't sure why they were so far back, almost avoiding the funeral entirely.

They were talking quietly between themselves, and I was sure that if I were human I would not have been able to hear a word. But I wasn't human, and I could hear their whispers and murmurs so clearly one might have thought they were speaking directly to me.

"I wish we weren't here," Mica said. My heart lurched.

"It hurts, I know," Jen said, and she sounded very tired. "But there was nothing we could have done. It happened." She tapped against her cast with her right hand absentmindedly. "And I wish Anna and Tess were here; I wish it so violently and fervently I feel like I might burst into flames if I thought it any harder…. But it's not going to happen."

My heart ached, and my eyes stung. I wanted nothing more than to drop down from the tree and take them in my arms and hug the life out of them. I wanted them to stop grieving for me and focus solely on Anna. But I knew it couldn't happen. I was dead to this part of the world, and if I were to show myself to Mica or Jen, it would only lead to more sorrow, more complications.

"It's not fair," Mica repeated uselessly.

"It's not," Jen agreed. "Nothing is okay. Nothing is alright…. But, I think one day everything will be okay and alright again. I think we've just got to hold on till then."

They shared soft, bittersweet smiles. I saw Jen take Mica's hand in hers, and I smiled as well. It hurt viciously, knowing that Mica and Jen survived and Anna did not, knowing that I had been given a second chance at life while Anna had not.

But it was just as Jen had said: I've just got to hold on till the day things are okay again.

* * *

 _March, 1972_

When my eye color finally faded from dark red to burnt orange, I was allowed to hunt with the others. I was only a tad worried, and that was only because I wasn't sure _how_ to tackle wolves and wrestle with cougars. Unfortunately, I had made the grave error of asking Emmett for advice about this while we trekked to the woods.

"—and wolves, they like to be stealthy, you know," Emmett prattled. "They'll always hide along the brush, or near trees. And usually it's not one wolf, either, so you've got to be prepared for an ambush. What Jasper likes to do is ambush the wolves before they ambush him. But _I_ —"

"He likes to stand still and let the wolves try to maul him," Rosalie deadpanned. She looked at me. " _Don't_ do that."

"No, _do that_ ," Emmett laughed. "It's hilarious! They get all confused because they can't push you down—"

"Are there even any wolves here?" I asked as we entered yet another clearing. I had caught sight of smaller animals—like hares and deer—but nothing as large or predatory as a wolf.

"No, not really," Emmett said. "I'm not sure if they're indigenous to this area."

"I think we saw a cougar once," Rosalie said when she saw my put-down expression. "But we haven't really caught anything more satisfying than a stag."

"This isn't a very good forest," I noted.

"Yeah, we've really got to move, and soon," Emmett said. His dark eyes roamed over the brush. "This town is a drag. I can't believe the low-stakes hospital rejected Carlisle."

"I think they were scared of him," I said absentmindedly, bounding ahead of Rosalie and Emmett, trying to catch sight of anything that was larger than a stag. "He was way too qualified to work there."

"I'm glad they rejected him," Rosalie said. "I didn't want to go to Rockport High. Did you _see_ their mascot? It looks like a clump of hair."

"I think it's supposed to be a monkey," Emmett said thoughtfully. "But the proportions—"

"Shh," I said, and inched forward into the wood.

Of all the members of my family, I had the best hearing. Maybe it was because I was always straining to hear their whispered conversations when I was still human.

From beyond the clearing, I heard the rough, ragged breaths of some animal that _definitely_ wasn't a deer or hare. The thirst burned in the back of my throat, and I let it lead me forward. Without so much as a warning to Emmett or Rosalie, I rushed forward, running past tree after tree, hopping over a boulder that had found its way into the wood, winding deeper and deeper into the forest until I found what I was looking for.

The bear was gigantic. He was lounging about, sniffing at the firm soil, pawing at the ground. When I came into view, the bear reared his head at me and stopped. I stared directly into his eyes, and he let out an almighty growl. Bears took direct eye contact to mean a challenge, and I was almost definitely challenging the bear before me.

I heard Rosalie and Emmett running toward me, but they were still far back. I took a step toward the bear, and he growled once more. I took another step, and this time he bounded forward, teeth gnashing, claws flashing wickedly in the stray sunlight that filtered through the canopy.

I stood still, unsure of what to do. The bear was going to hit me, but I didn't know how to stop him, how to move, how to subdue him.

The bear collided roughly into me, but I hardly moved back an inch. It was only when the bear was thrown back, and whined at the impact, that I realized _I was a fucking vampire_. I didn't have to do anything more than reach forward and grab the bear. Just a quarter of my strength would be enough to overpower him.

I grinned. When the bear righted itself, I took a step forward. But he didn't seem at all intimidated. If anything, he seemed confused—ears flat against its skull, eyes looking around the clearing, as though searching for an escape.

" _Tess_?!" Rosalie cried out. She and Emmett had finally arrived. They circled the area where the bear had slammed into me. "Tess—where did you go—?"

"I'm right here," I said, still approaching the bear.

"Where?" she asked frantically, whipping around.

Was this some kind of joke? If it was, it was a very bad one, and I couldn't exactly be bothered about playing along at the moment. The thirst traced down the back of my throat like a razor, and I let it drag me to the bear. He didn't even see me coming: one moment, he was sniffing the air cautiously, and the next he howled horribly as I sank my fangs into his thick, furry neck.

"Uh—Rose?" Emmett called out worriedly. "Is it just me or is that bear just thrashing around?"

"I—I don't know, Emmett," Rosalie said with great hesitancy.

 _Of course_ he's thrashing around, I thought irritably as I guzzled down the blood greedily. After all, I'm sucking him dry. I'd imagine it would be quite a painful ordeal for a bear. My mouth never left its mark, but my hands moved around to encircle the bear. I pulled back, and I heard an audible _crack_ as the neck was snapped. The bear stilled, and I quickly finished off the rest of the blood. I stood, and wiped my mouth on the hem of my shirt. My thirst hadn't been completely sated, but it was far better now. It was almost like a tickle in the back of my throat—a fiery, neverending tickle. I looked down to see how much of a mess I had made—

" _Holy fuck_!" I cried out.

"Tess?" Rosalie yelled in response. "Is that you?"

" _Where did my body go_?" I said. There was nothing there but air. My legs had vanished, my arms had vanished. Heck, the blood that should have been all over my clothes wasn't even there.

"You're asking us?" Emmett huffed. "I thought you'd know the answer to that."

"I'm _invisible_ —!" I was grinning so widely I thought my face might break. So _this_ was my power. I could still feel myself. I could move my arm, and know that my arm was moving. But when I looked, there was nothing there.

"Invisible?" they both said together, although Rosalie sounded irritated and Emmett sounded delighted.

"Yeah," I said, and began to walk over to them. I stepped as lightly as I could, so they wouldn't know I was coming. But even when my foot hit the forest floor a little too hard, there was no sound. "Isn't this great?"

"Oh, wait till Jasper finds out," Emmett said gleefully. "Or—on second thought—let's not tell him, not yet…"

"Did you feed, hon?" Rosalie asked. Her eyes scanned over me, trying to find some indication that I was there and not somewhere else. "Should we head back?"

I nodded, and then realized she couldn't see. "Yeah. I want to show Carlisle and the others." My head was rolling with the possibilities: I would finally be able to prank Edward without him realizing. I could actually _win_ a fight against Jasper.

"Um...are you moving?" Emmett asked, looking around. "Are we going?"

"Maybe you should become visible again," Rosalie said. "So we know if you're there, at least. This is…kind of strange, talking to thin air."

"Yeah, sure," I said, and concentrated very hard. How does one turn visible? Maybe if I thought very hard about my body—about having legs and arms and a face. I scrunched up my face and tried to imagine my body appearing….

"Are you still there?" Emmett asked after a moment.

"Yeah…" I opened my eyes, looked at where my hands should have been but were not, and sighed. "So—don't freak out, but there's a bit of a problem…. I'm not really sure _how_ to become visible again?"

Rosalie sighed deeply.

* * *

A/N : thank you for sticking around! the next couple of chapters should be up shortly, too! also, thank you so, so much for the kind reviews! they really mean a lot :)


	13. The Vision

Chapter Thirteen

 _May, 1973_

Strangely, the person who helped me figure out how to control my power was Jasper. It was unexpected, because his gift had never really affected me, and we had all assumed long ago that they were something of opposites. But his gift was physical, and mine partly was (at least the disappearing part was), so he was the only one who could really give any advice.

At first, I became invisible almost at random—when I was watching TV, when I was having an argument with someone, when I was in the middle of a hunt. Jasper found the commonality: I became invisible when I was engrossed in something. He said that was how his power had started out, too; when he became too happy or too sad or too angry, he found that the people around him would, too. It was confusing at first, because people's emotions spread out from them like a kind of cloud. Feelings erupted and receded, intermingled with other feelings. It took quite some time before Jasper could pinpoint who was feeling what, and even longer for him to manipulate a certain person's emotions.

And it took much, much longer for me to learn the intricacies of my gift. Becoming invisible wasn't just disappearing. It was almost like you weren't existing. You had to separate yourself from yourself. When it happened by accident, I rarely noticed. But when I tried it on purpose, it was like a part of me was being pulled away. It was like my body was being stretched so far and thin it was no longer visible to the naked eye. Coming back was dizzying, and required me to unfocus, to lose interest, to distance myself from whatever it was I was partaking in. It was how Jasper felt all the time, when he was trying not to get muddled up in the feelings of twenty people at once. It was something of a meditative state, and it hurt a bit, too, because my body was snapping back into the seen world.

It took a while, but soon I could disappear and reappear at will. And I could do other things, too. Like Jasper's gift, mine operated on levels. It wasn't so much the power of invisibility as it was the power of hiding. I could veil my scent, disappear my body but leave my mind, or vanish completely and utterly so that there was no trace of me at all—physically or mentally.

It was _great_ for accomplishing pranks.

Edward was in the living room, flipping through yet another tragic romance novel. He had been sitting there for nearly an hour. I had pretended to leave with Jasper on a hunt an hour and a half ago. Of course, Edward was extremely suspicious of my very loud goodbye, and he had proceeded to patrol through the house to see if I was actually still there.

After a while, he decided he was safe and settled down to read. A terrible decision on his part, really.

From the corner of the living room, I ran forward and leaped into the air, body slamming into Edward.

"Got you!" I yelled as my body collided roughly into his. It sounded like an avalanche. His novel was flung out of his grasp and skidded across the linoleum floor.

"Get _off_!" Edward yelled back, shoving me off and rising. His lips were twisted into a scowl and his eyes scanned over where he thought I was. "Carlisle said you can't do this anymore."

"Carlisle's at work," I said, reappearing.

"I'm going to tell him as soon—"

"He's just going to cut my allowance again. I can live with that," I shrugged. "Unlike some people, I don't _need_ all that money because I don't buy whole sets of trashy romance books—"

"They're _classics_ —"

" _Sure_ they are."

Edward groaned and bent down to pick up his book. He shot me a filthy glare. "The transformation just made you _more_ irritating."

"Oh, that's just _mean_."

"You just _body slammed_ me."

"Yeah, but that didn't hurt, did it?"

"That's not the point!" Edward said, stalking away.

"Sometimes words hurt more than a body slam, Edward!" I called out, but he only grumbled in response.

* * *

 _March, 1974_

After spending _too much time_ doing _nothing_ in Rockport, Esme and Jasper finally figured out a new location in Minnesota where we could move to, one where Carlisle could work at a low-profile hospital and where we could go to school. (Although, to be honest, I was pretty resilient to the idea of repeating high school.)

Now that I was a vampire, too, we could avoid public transportation completely. Carlisle decided that we would travel to Minnesota by foot in two groups, since that would be more efficient than one large group of eight. Carlisle, Esme, Jasper, and Alice would go in from the west while Rose, Emmett, Edward, and I would move from the east. Edward wasn't a fan of this.

"She's going to trick me," he complained to Carlisle and Esme. "Can't Alice go instead?"

"You know Alice and Tess can't be together," Carlisle said. I was amazed at how patient he was despite the fact that this was the fifth time he was telling this to Edward. "Her power doesn't work properly if Tess is there, and I need to know if anything—"

"Okay, but what about Jasper?" Edward asked.

In fact, Jasper was originally supposed to travel with my group, but he had managed to convince Carlisle to switch over because of the same reason Edward had. Jasper mouthed _fat chance_ to Edward from behind Carlisle. Edward shot Jasper a dirty look.

" _I_ want Jasper to be there," Alice said crossly. "Grow up, Edward."

"You're asking _me_ to grow up?" Edward said, aghast. He gestured to me. " _Ten_ times I've been ambushed by her. And that's just in the past two days."

I rolled my eyes and patted his arm. He scowled at me. "Calm down, Eddie. You know I'm not going to pull anything with Rose there."

He narrowed his eyes at me. "You know as well as I do that Emmett is going to distract Rosalie for you."

"I've no idea what you're talking about," I said.

Edward turned back to Carlisle. "How about Esme—"

"Edward," Carlisle sighed. "We decided on this _weeks_ ago. We're leaving in _five_ minutes. I'm not going to rearrange everything now."

Edward's shoulders slumped down. Carlisle smiled consolingly at him before picking up his bag and heading out. Jasper and Alice followed behind him. Esme lingered for a couple of moments, to say goodbye, but soon she left as well.

"Cheer up. The hours will go by fast, I promise," I told Edward as we waited for Emmett and Rosalie to come down so we could head out.

"Can you at least _warn_ me before you do something?" he pleaded.

"Sorry, bud. No can do." I patted Edward on the shoulder sympathetically. He shook me off.

* * *

Three hours into our journey, tensions were running high. Edward was steaming, Rosalie was irritated, Emmett was growing bored of the constant running, and even I was beginning to find it difficult to joke around.

"We're way off track," Rosalie said, squinting down at the map.

"Of course we are," Edward grumbled. He looked at me. "Who's fault is that, I wonder?"

"Yours?" I guessed.

" _Me_?" he cried out. "You didn't have to swing down from a tree and knock me into a boulder! We had to wait around for a half hour just to make sure the noise didn't attract any passersby."

"Why were you standing next to the boulder?"

"I hate you _so much_ —"

"Love you, too, Eddie—"

"I swear to god, I'm going to find someway to counteract your invisibility—"

"Ha! Good luck doing the impossible—"

" _You_ —"

"Would you two shut it?" Rosalie said fiercely, still eyeing the map. "We're going to be late meeting up with Carlisle and the others at the halfway point."

I leaned over and looked at the map. My golden eyes scanned past where Rosalie's finger was pointing. "Why don't we go through that little town?" I asked, and added my own finger to the map. "It saves us having to go through this wasteland for two more hours. We'll be discreet."

"We can," Rosalie began slowly, "but _only_ if you two—" her eyes snapped to Edward, who merely shook his head, "—can stay quiet for an hour. We _cannot_ attract attention."

"Sure," I said. "I'll be invisible, too—"

" _No_!" Edward said at once.

"—or not," I finished off.

Rosalie sighed while Emmett laughed.

"Let's just go," Rosalie said, rolling up the map and stuffing it into her backpack.

We followed Rosalie's lead. Emmett and I were close behind Rosalie, and Edward trailed behind us at some distance. He was the fastest of us all, and I had no doubt he could leave us in the dust if he wanted to. But experience had quickly taught him that having me in his sights at all times was the best way to ensure I wasn't up to anything mischievous.

It was dusk when we reached the town. Emmett and Rosalie skirted around lamplights and stayed close to shadowy alleys. Edward followed behind them closely. I just walked in a straight line, turning invisible whenever I approached a light source, and reappearing when I approached any dark area, just so Emmett and Rosalie knew I was still there.

"Show off," Edward grumbled.

"Just because your power isn't _practical_ —"

"How is telepathy not practical?" Edward demanded. "How is not knowing what someone's thinking at any given moment _not_ practical?"

"It doesn't work on me, so it can't be too great of a power, Edward."

He opened his mouth to retort, but I shushed him, turning slightly to the left. There was something—or someone—about twenty yards to the east. There was a loud thumping noise, followed by a sickening crack, and then the distinct sound of someone slurping blood. I looked back to Edward. His brows were furrowed, head tilted downward. He could hear this vampire's thoughts, I supposed.

"Should we help?" I whispered to him. If people were in danger, then we ought to save them, right?

Emmett and Rosalie had looped back to us as soon as they noticed Edward and I had come to a stop.

"If you two are arguing again…" Rosalie threatened.

Emmett frowned as soon as he caught sight of my pensive expression and Edward's worried one. "Is everything okay?"

Edward's eyes flickered to Emmett, and then to Rosalie. "It's Solomon," he said.

" _Who_ —?" I began.

" _Fuck_ ," Emmett said, and the lightheartedness he had carried with him throughout this whole trek disappeared in an instant. Straight-backed and steely-eyed, he looked to Edward and asked, "Is he close? Can we—"

"He's already heard us," Edward said apprehensively.

Edward was right. I could hear this vampire—Solomon, or whatever—stopping his feast. Heavy feet collided against the pavement. He might have been heading in a direction opposite to where we were, but something told me he was coming toward us.

Rosalie whipped to me immediately. Her eyes were wide, lips taught. She grabbed me by the shoulders and whispered hurriedly, "Tess, I need you to turn invisible _right now_. You've got to run to the halfway point, tell Carlisle and Esme—"

"We've _all_ got to run—" Edward said urgently.

" _Tess_ ," Rosalie said with more urgency. "I need you to _vanish_ —"

I did. Just like that, I was gone, and Rosalie's hands fell from my shoulder. I took a step northward, away from them, but something stopped me from going on. I couldn't just leave them here, not if the vampire that was lumbering toward them was a threat.

"We've got to _go_ —" Emmett said.

"Yes, but opposite to Tess," Rosalie said in a hushed tone. "He'll follow our scent—"

"He—" Edward began, and then stopped. He didn't have to finish, because the vampire in question had arrived.

He arrived around the corner, just a street across from Rosalie, Emmett, and Edward. When he caught sight of them, he grinned a sickly grin, and came forward. He was incredibly tall but as skinny as a twig, and I was immediately skeptical at the thought that this vampire could pose as any sort of threat. Next to Emmett, it looked like a breeze might blow him in half. His hair came to his shoulders and was dark, scraggly, and grimy. His clothes were very ragged and stained with fresh blood, most likely from his latest victim. His eyes were bright crimson, and under the shadows of the town, they looked horribly eerie.

"Well, well, well," Solomon said, sauntering forward. "Where is the rest of your coven? Tell me the pale-haired one who thought it was so _wise_ to cross paths with me is dead."

Emmett's hand clasped Rosalie's tightly, and he already began to break into a sprint. Edward caught sight of this, and moved to follow, but before he could, Solomon burst forward and grabbed Edward. One pale hand of his wrapped around Edward's throat, the other stopped Edward's hands from freeing himself.

"Looks like at least one of you won't escape me this time." Solomon laughed, and it was a rough, guttural thing.

Emmett and Rosalie stopped and turned back. Emmett rushed forward, and I was certain he would be able to tackle Solomon to the ground and free Edward. Rosalie would probably come in afterwards and rip Solomon's head from his body.

But this dream never came to realization. Emmett ran toward Solomon, but he never got closer than two feet. As soon as he was within grasping reach, he was blown backwards. I stared at the scene, and moved forward. It was only then that I caught sight of something thinner than a knife's edge, shimmering all around Solomon. It must have been something like a force field.

 _Fuck_ , I thought wildly, because this meant that neither Rosalie or Emmett could actually save Edward, who was still in Solomon's grasp. I moved forward cautiously, until I was just at the edge of the faint force field.

"Let him go," Rosalie said viciously. "We can come to some sort of deal. Carlisle is likely on his way now. You can work something out."

This was, of course, a bold-faced lie. Carlisle was not on his way, and this was partly my fault. I was still here and still invisible, so Alice had no idea this was happening right now. This meant that she hadn't alerted Carlisle, which meant he didn't know that anything at all was amiss.

Solomon laughed again. "A _deal_? What could I need from a creature as pathetic and inferior as you?"

Rosalie seemed to be doing some mental gymnastics, trying to find out another angle by which to approach this situation. Solomon's grip around Edward's neck tightened, and I looked back to the force field. I reached a hand out, and traced the edge of it gingerly.

Nothing happened.

It was like I was touching air. My eyes flickered back to Edward. I braced myself and stepped through his force field. It let me through like I was nothing but a mote of dust passing by. I smiled tensely. I wasn't a very experienced fighter. Jasper _had_ shown me defensive and offensive tactics all my life, but I never had any need to actually put them into use. But the situation was dire and Edward _needed_ me. I'd force Solomon to his knees if it was the last thing I'd ever do.

I moved back out of the force field, and went further and further back until I was about five yards from Solomon. With a running start, I flung myself into the air, and brought myself down on Solomon. My hands reached out and grabbed onto his neck first, forcing him down to the ground with me.

His head collided roughly with the ground, and he cried out in surprise, but he did not let Edward go. At least his arms were preoccupied, so he couldn't get rid of me. I wrapped my own arms around his neck from the back, effectively putting him in a chokehold as well. My grip was so strong I was surprised Solomon's head didn't burst from the amount of pressure I was putting on him.

"Tess!" Rosalie cried out, and moved forward, only to be stopped by Emmett.

"I see...you've gotten yourself...a better coven member," Solomon choked out raspily.

"Let my brother go," I said fiercely.

Solomon seemed to be weighing his options. I increased my grip, and he spoke: "Shall we...make a...deal?"

"Shall I snap your neck?" I retorted.

I wasn't actually sure if I could manage that. I was already using all the strength my body could muster, and I wasn't sure if I had what it took to decapitate him. I wasn't even sure how one went about doing that. Did I have to grab him by the ear and just pull? Did I need both hands?

He remained quiet for a moment, and the said, "I'll let your... _brother_ —" there was a faint trace of disgust in his voice when he said the word, "—go...if you release me."

"Why should I trust you?"

"I would never...betray another vampire...as powerful as me."

"Release Edward first," I demanded.

"And why...should I trust... _you_?"

I pulled against his neck, and heard something of a crack. I glanced down at his skin, and saw that it had begun to fracture under my grip.

"That's why," I said.

Wordlessly, he relaxed his grip on Edward slowly, until it got to a point where Edward was able to weasel his way back. As soon as he was no longer touching Solomon, the force field forced him outward, landing him near Emmett and Rosalie. Edward rubbed at his neck.

Solomon's hands, now free, reached behind his neck, where I was. I let go of him instantly, and rolled away. Solomon growled and rose from the ground. His eyes scanned the area, but he saw nothing.

"A deal is a deal," I said, and his head snapped toward the direction of my voice. "Leave."

Solomon stalked toward me, and I moved away instantly. He stopped in his tracks, thinking the better of it. His eyes landed on Emmett, Rosalie, and Edward. He scowled at them before turning around and running into the dark of a distant alleyway.

I ran back to Rosalie, slowly turning visible. She grabbed me and pulled me into a tight hug.

"I'll drop my invisibility fully," I breathed into her neck. "So Alice knows—"

"No," Rosalie said immediately, and pulled herself away from me. "Stay invisible—fully—in case he comes back."

"Yeah, okay," I said immediately, and began to vanish once more. "But _who_ was that? Why does he hate you?"

"We'll explain when we meet up with Carlisle," Edward said. He grimaced at me. "Thanks, by the way."

"Does this make up for all the times I ambushed you—"

"Absolutely _not_."

* * *

We arrived at the halfway point nearly five hours later. Rosalie had abandoned our effort to be discreet. As soon as we were out of the town, we sidelined back into the wilderness and ran with reckless abandon. Rosalie had Edward run at top speed, so he could get to Carlisle before us and alert him. As a result, I hadn't really seen Edward in the past couple of hours. I'd never admit it, but I was more than a little worried. What if Solomon had come back and intercepted Edward?

When we arrived at the meet-up (a clearing just north of a popular hiking path), Edward was in the middle of his explanation. Alice was blank-eyed, no doubt trying to divine what was coming next. Carlisle wore his usual pensive expression whenever one of us came to him with bad news. Jasper looked on stonily, and Esme hugged me as soon as I came into view. She let go of me and then wrapped her arms around Rosalie, who sheepishly patted Esme on the back.

"So _now_ can I get an explanation?" I asked brashly, approaching Carlisle.

Carlisle looked up at my voice, and he relaxed. "Oh, Tess—thank goodness your power allowed you to gain the upperhand over Solomon."

"You should've been there," Emmett told Jasper. He was beaming. "Solomon looked like he was about to burst into tears—"

" _Who_ is Solomon?" I tried again.

Alice shook herself out of her vision-induced stupor. "Do you remember when I told you there were two possibilities for your future after your parents died? You could have come with us or—"

"Or gone to a foster home, yeah," I nodded. "And then you said a vampire would visit—" I frowned as realization dawned on me. "Oh, _no_ —that's not possible—it was _Solomon_?"

Alice nodded. "He's technically a fugitive, or whatever the vampire equivalent of a fugitive is. He's a nomad that goes on frequent hunting sprees to sate his thirst. I thought he left the country after…."

"After what?"

"After we confronted him," Carlisle sighed. "Although you had chosen to come with us following your parent's death, that didn't mean that Alice's vision wouldn't come true. It would still happen, just without you in the mix."

"So Solomon still visited that foster home," I guessed easily. "And he went on a rampage?"

"We tried to stop him," Carlisle said.

"You actually _fought_ that guy?" I said somewhat incredulously. I couldn't imagine how any of them could have gotten _near_ Solomon. "Was it just you or—"

"No, we all went, except Esme," Rosalie said. "She was babysitting you then."

"Well—six against one, then. Did you manage to overwhelm him?"

Emmett snorted. "We couldn't even touch him. We knew from Alice that he could repel, but we didn't realize how potent his force field actually was. Edward thought we could overwhelm him. Boy, was he wrong."

Edward winced at the memory. "In my defense, I thought he was projecting it mentally, and too many people coming at him at once would cause him to lose focus."

"Yeah, unfortunately it _wasn't_ mental," Jasper drawled. "And none of us have long-range offensive gifts, so we got our asses handed to us. Carlisle left to alert police discreetly, so Solomon would at least be forced to cut his spree short."

My brows furrowed. "Why would human police stop him? You guys couldn't."

"It wasn't the police; it was the threat of revealing vampires to the public that forced him away," Alice corrected. "Because that would mean the Volturi would come after him, and he definitely didn't want that type of attention."

"Is that why he has a grudge?" I continued tirelessly. "Because you cut his little murder session short?"

"It's more than that," Alice said. "Solomon has a very...unique mindset. He was upset that _we_ specifically had managed to disrupt his plans, because, well, he doesn't really see us as proper vampires. He doesn't see most vampires as proper vampires, because most vampires can't get past his force field."

"And he _especially_ doesn't like us, because we're vegetarian," Emmett added. "In case you didn't notice, he has something of a superiority complex."

"I noticed," I said dryly. I shook my head slowly. "Wow, I can't believe your past just caught up with us. Is he going to come back, Alice?"

"No, I don't think so," she said, but she was frowning. "I don't know, actually. Everything is kind of fuzzy. You being at the site of battle has kind of thrown everything off track. I think Solomon's confused, too. I don't think he knows what to do either."

"This is certainly worrisome, though," Jasper drawled thoughtfully. "Because in all of Alice's visions, Solomon has been the gateway to…" Jasper looked at me, "you."

"What?" I said. "Wait—hold on—what about that other vision you had? About if my parents _had_ been saved. I would have gone to France, you said, and then a Volturi guard would have come across me—"

"Because he was trying to capture Solomon," Alice explained. "In every reality, Solomon will be captured by the Volturi. He will cross the line at a certain point, and the Volturi _will_ get involved. It's just that, somehow…"

"I've been thrown into the mix every time?" None of this boded well. I wasn't sure if it was my own anxiety or some kind of vampire sense I now had, but every fiber of my being was buzzing with a sense of dread. "Could it be possible that despite everything you've all done...I'm going to meet the same fate I would have if you had never taken me in?"

No one said anything.

* * *

 _April, 1974_

We got our answer a month later, not from the Volturi themselves but from Alice. We—Edward, Esme, and I—had been in the midst of a hunt, when she stopped still in the center of a clearing, eyes glazed over. Her hands were moving rapidly in the air, as though she were trying to draw out the scene for us but hadn't realized there was nothing to draw on.

Edward relayed what she was seeing: Solomon will make his way through Spain on a spree, alerting the Spanish coven. A few members of the Spanish coven will travel to Volterra to seek the Volturi's help to stop him. The Volturi, eager to capture Solomon as another weapon in their arsenal, will send a couple of guards. After a couple of tries, they'll subdue him and bring him back to Volterra for an audience.

The Volturi will quickly realize that Solomon cannot be controlled. He's a risky gamble. Ultimately, they'll decide to execute Solomon, because it would be better not to let his power fall into someone else's hands. Solomon will try to strike a deal—information about another powerful vampire he met in exchange for his life (albeit in the Volturi's service). But Aro would have already searched his mind; he would already know who the powerful vampire is, and would know where she was.

He'll know it's me, and he'll know I'm with the Cullens.

* * *

A/N : i know the action in this chapter is kind of speedy, but i am excited to get to the meat of the story. demetri is in the next chapter!

 **spiritgirl16** : thanks so much for the reviews! they were very sweet. :) i was really interested in having tess's power be invisibility, because i thought it would create an interesting dynamic with demetri's power. i also feel like it fits her character pretty well. you don't see it often, because she's usually with the cullens who _do_ notice her because she's family; but whenever tess has been with other people/people she doesn't know, she's usually passed over and unnoticed.


	14. Demonstration

Part II : Demetrius

* * *

Chapter Fourteen

 _May, 1974_

The invitation we received from the Volturi was actually quite anticlimactic. Based on what Edward had told me about these "royals of the vampire world," I expected a gold-embossed invite with fleur-de-lis borders. Instead, we got a phone call from the Volturi's receptionist, who—based on the stuttering I heard from the receiver—was a human. She didn't give much of an explanation, either, and just told us that the Volturi had heard the Cullens added a new member to the coven and would like to meet them. The lack of detail might have been because the Volturi didn't want to alert any suspicions, or, more likely, because they figured Alice had already seen the decisions that led to the invite.

There had been a bit of an argument concerning our means of transportation. I assumed we would be traveling by plane, and—based on Carlisle's incredulous expression—swiftly realized that having a barely three-year-old vampire on an enclosed flying tube with a hundred people was probably _not_ a good idea. I mean, I sort of thought I could just hold my breath the entire way, but the others weren't willing to take the chance with me (or Jasper, I later learned).

So then Emmett suggested we run and swim all the way to Volterra, which Edward and I were steadfastly against (because, _seriously_ , swimming for like _fifteen_ hours—that was _boring_ ). Rosalie, for the one millionth time, brought up the option of just ignoring the Volturi's invite, because, well, whatever they wanted from us couldn't possibly be good for our physical or mental wellbeing. Carlisle and Esme quickly reminded Rosalie that declining the invite would most likely mean Alec and Jane—who I learned were very powerful, high-ranking guards with _insane_ superpowers and sadistic temperaments—would pay us a personal visit, which wasn't very good for our physical or mental wellbeing, either.

In the end, the issue was resolved when Alice purchased a yacht under one of her many aliases. Since crossing the Atlantic took approximately two weeks (technically one and a half, seeing as Edward sailed it like a madman), we fed heavily before we took off in order to satiate us during the trip. The plan was that we could last two weeks on a meal, and then hunt as soon as we docked.

None of us realized Emmett had snuck eight hares on board to snack on. None of us anticipated that the hares would escape.

In short, it wasn't a very fun trip. One part of the reason why was because it took me a good couple of hours to sniff out those canny hares. The other part was because the more time we spent on the high seas, the more anxious I got. All Rosalie, Alice, and Edward did was warn me about what I absolutely could not do in front of the Volturi _lest I be sentenced to death_. Rule number one was to not trust the Volturi. Rule number two was to never go with any member of the Volturi alone. Rule number three was to _never trust the Volturi_. And so on, and so on….

By the time we arrived on the shore of Spain, I was absolutely dreading our audience with the Volturi. Part of me kept thinking that Rosalie, Alice, and Edward were exaggerating, as they tended to do. But when I asked Jasper and Emmett, they agreed with whatever the others had said. Yes, the Volturi were dangerous. Yes, they took pleasure in murdering innocent people and spreading fear. Yes, they were rather skilled at manipulating people. And, of course, yes—I should _never, ever trust them_.

We ran from Spain to Italy, always hiding in the forest or trekking across deserted streets at night, careful to stay in the shadows. I was a bit surprised when Carlisle announced we were in Volterra; it had only taken us six hours, and I wasn't the least bit tired.

"So this is it, huh?" I said as we walked briskly through winding cobblestone streets.

Carlisle was leading us up ahead, on account of him being the only person who actually knew where the Volturi's hideout was. He was wearing a hat and sunglasses, as were the rest of us. There _was_ an overcast, but Carlisle was paranoid that the sun might come out at any moment. I thought he should be more paranoid about how suspicious eight people in ridiculously large hats and sunglasses looked.

"Yeah, that's the place, I think," Alice said, pointing up ahead.

I looked ahead and nearly bumped into Edward, who was walking ahead of me. _That_ was where the Volturi lived? It was an _actual_ palace. Scratch that, a castle—a bonafide, medieval castle. It was distant from the rest of the town, on account of it being its own estate, probably, and surrounded by greenery and gardens. There were stone walkways that connected some outer turrets to the main building. I couldn't imagine just a dozen or so vampires living there. It looked like it could house a thousand people comfortably.

"We're just going to walk in there?" I said dubiously. "Won't people notice? It looks like it's a historical site."

"No, we're not going to walk in there," Carlisle assured me. He took a sharp left into an alleyway, and we followed suit. "There are many entrances that the Volturi use for many purposes. We'll be going into a side entrance the Volturi entertain guests from."

My anxiety only grew as we neared the walkways. "How will they know we're here?"

"There are cameras," Carlisle said, glancing back at me. He frowned. "I don't think you should turn invisible right now."

"What—" I looked down, and saw that my legs had vanished. "Oh, sorry."

"Don't worry," Alice said. She patted my arm comfortingly. "I'll be right by you the whole time, giving you correct cues and all."

"I thought that was _my_ job," Edward said, turning to Alice.

"No," Alice said. "You're supposed to be helping Carlisle mediate."

"Wait, I thought _that_ was _my_ job," Jasper piped in.

"Do _any_ of you idiots know what you're supposed to be doing?" Rosalie said, exasperated. "I thought we went over this on the boat ride."

"Some of us were busy catching rabbits," Edward muttered, shooting Emmett a glare.

"This really isn't helping, guys," I said.

"Sorry," Rosalie said immediately. "But it'll be okay, Tess, really. We'll be in and out of there before you know it. I'm sure the most they'll do is try to offer you a position there. You just have to remember—"

"Don't trust the Volturi," I recited boredly. I glanced back down at my feet and was relieved that they were back. All I had to do was just _not_ spiral. Easy enough, right?

"Okay, we're here," Carlisle said, stopping us about twenty yards from the castle. "Well, not _here_ , but almost. I just want to give you all a moment. Tess?"

"I'm good," I said. "I'm reciting the alphabet backwards."

Jasper beamed. It was his trick.

"You'll be fine," Carlisle said reassuringly. Carlisle didn't mince words. If he thought I would be fine, then I must be, right?

I smiled. "Thanks."

He turned back around to lead us forward, and as we walked I realized that there were now two guards by the side entrance. Presumably, the security cameras had picked up on our arrival and these guards were meant to escort us to wherever we were meeting the three leaders of the Volturi.

The one of the left was enormous—much taller and beefier than Emmett, who was the strongest vampire I knew. He was wearing some nondescript black robes, which I felt would absolutely draw attention considering it was approaching summer. His skin was deathly pale, his hair was straight and black, and his lips curved into an expectant smile as we came nearer and nearer. I got the feeling he wasn't happy to see us but happy to be in charge of us. The minute Rosalie caught sight of him, she stuck herself closer to my side.

The guard on the right wasn't as large or hulking. He was built like a sabre—lean and sharp. I didn't know if he was supposed to be the more clever of the two or if he simply had some power to make up for the fact that he wasn't as physically imposing. He was olive-skinned, with tousled chestnut-colored hair, and burgundy eyes that were trained on our steadily approaching forms. He seemed more serious than his counterpart, and I wondered if he was supposed to be one of those higher-ranking guards Carlisle had told me about.

"Ah, the Cullens," the leaner guard acknowledged.

Carlisle stopped just in front of him. Emmett and Jasper stood to Carlisle's immediate left, in front of the large guard. Edward and Esme were on Carlisle's right, across the leaner guard. Rosalie, Alice, and I were behind them. I wasn't sure if they had planned this formation or it was just happenstance, but something told me it was the former.

"Demetri," Carlisle greeted the lean guard first. He looked to the large guard and nodded. "Felix. How have you been?"

"Rather bored," Felix said, and he eyed us eagerly. "I've been looking forward to some action."

Didn't they only _just_ take down Solomon, a rabid nomad who had eluded the Volturi for nearly two decades? How was that chase alone not enough action for a lifetime?

Maybe it was how skeptical I looked, but the lean guard—Demetri, was it?—looked right at me. His crimson eyes sought out my golden ones through the gap in the wall of family members in front of me.

"And this is the newest addition?" Demetri asked, looking back to Carlisle.

I scoffed. "Not really _new_ —"

Alice nudged me, and I clamped my mouth shut. That was right; I was supposed to let Carlisle do all the talking until I was actually required to talk. This was to avoid miscommunication or something of the sort. But, honestly, how could Alice expect me _not_ to answer that? That guard had referred to me in third person and I was _right there_. That was irritating as all hell.

"Shall we go?" Demetri said, lingering on me for a moment, probably wondering why I had cut myself off. "Aro and the others are expecting you in the throne room."

I wanted to scoff again, but held myself back. _Throne room_? Seriously? How pretentious were these vampires, exactly?

Carlisle nodded, and Demetri led the way forward now. Felix followed us from behind. We went through a long stone tunnel before finally emerging in the interior of the castle. The stonework was a dark brown, and there were various red and black velvet tapestries hanging over the walls. We walked toward a marble archway, and we all filed in.

The throne room was absolutely breathtaking. It had to have been renovated, because it looked completely different from the rest of the castle. Every inch was marble—the floor, the walls, the ceiling. There was a circular, raised dais in the center of the room, with steps leading up to it. On it were three black and gold thrones for the three leaders of the Volturi: Marcus, Aro, and Caius.

I spotted who Marcus was instantly. He was the sloe-eyed, dull one, who hadn't even looked up when we entered. Carlisle had told me that his disposition was due to the fact that his wife had died long ago. Aro was the one in the center, with a manic gleam in his milky-red eyes. And Caius was on Aro's other side, with sleek blond hair and a ruthless glare.

They weren't so intimidating in person. They wore matching black suits, and Caius had a designer scarf around his neck.

"Carlisle," Aro said rather warmly, rising from his seat and descending down the small stairs. He threw his hands out in a gesture of welcome. "It is a pleasure to see you again after all these years."

Carlisle returned the smile with a softer one of his own. "The pleasure is all mine, Aro."

Aro turned next to Alice, and he looked upon her hungrily. "And dear Alice—what a delight to see you in person at last." She gave him a tense smile in return. Given as how I was right next to Alice, Aro set his sights on me. "And you must be the one Solomon informed us about."

I nodded.

"Do you mind?" Aro asked eagerly, gesturing to me. He looked to Carlisle once.

"Of course not," Carlisle said smoothly, and stepped aside so that I may come forward.

I was confused at first, but remembered that this was something that Aro did. His gift was to root through people's memories, and he only wanted to touch my hand and look through mine. I walked forward and stretched out my right hand. Aro took it in his quickly, but as soon as he touched it, he let it go.

"Ah, I see," he said rather disappointedly. "You cannot let your gift wane for a moment?"

Oh, right. While my body was visible, my scent and mind were not readily available. Carlisle had told me that the Volturi's tracker could catch onto the "flavor" of your mind, and I was hesitant to let the tracker catch onto mine. So, I had been hiding my scent and my mind since we got off the boat—not that Alice or Edward had objected to it.

"No," I lied, because I really didn't want him to go through my memories. That was just awkward, and I _had_ been a teenage girl once, after all. "I haven't really figured out that part yet."

"I see," he said, and searched my eyes for a moment. He looked past me, to the other Cullens. "Then may I have dear Alice's hand? So that I might understand the history behind your latest acquisition."

I bit my tongue. I wasn't an _acquisition_ ; I was family. But I had a feeling Aro didn't really understand what family was.

Edward stepped forward. "I could—"

"No, it's okay," Alice said immediately, _harshly_. I had definitely screwed something up, but I didn't know _what_.

Alice came up besides me and extended her hand to Aro stiffly. Aro touched it, and his eyes glazed over as he flitted through her memories. Alice was staring very hard at the floor. After a few seconds, Aro let go of her hand. His smile had become a full-blown grin, and it looked downright eerie on him. Alice stepped closer to me.

"What a _potent_ gift," Aro breathed, looking to me.

Caius had leaned forward. His red eyes gleamed. "What is it? Repulsion, as Solomon said?"

Aro's eyes did not leave me. "Do you consent to a demonstration, Therese? I think it would help illustrate the exact nature of your gift."

Alice discreetly tapped her hand against the back of mine once. It meant _yes_.

"Sure," I said, and readied myself. "Do you want me to just—"

"No, no," Aro said immediately. He looked past me. "I suggest a sort of game, if you will. I think it would help pass the time, and we'll be able to catch up in the meantime."

Caius looked like he would rather have his head torn off than catch up with any of us, but he didn't say anything contrary to Aro.

"What do you suggest?" Carlisle asked.

"Demetri," Aro called.

He had been standing the entrance with Felix. He came forward, inclined his head towards Aro, and glanced at me curiously. "Yes?"

"I want you to track Therese," Aro stated plainly, gesturing to me. I always hated my full name, but, somehow, I hated it more coming out of Aro's mouth. "She will have one minute to go anywhere, so long as it is in the castle. And you will have…hmm, let us say five minutes to find her and bring her here?"

Demetri looked very bored by this game, but he nodded. I supposed _he_ was the tracker Carlisle had told me about, and I got a little apprehensive. Why did he feel like this wasn't such a big deal? _Could_ he track me despite the fact that my mind was hidden?

Aro clapped his hands together happily. Alice looked incredibly annoyed. Caius looked like he would rather do _anything_ than wait around for five minutes to find out what my gift was. And Marcus…didn't even seem to know what was happening.

God, what had I gotten myself into?

"You may begin," Aro said, nodding to me.

I turned around. Rosalie was gripping Emmett's hand so tightly I wondered how she hadn't broken it off from his hand yet. I gave her what I hoped was a reassuring smile before I dashed out of the throne room completely. I made it to the stairs before stopping and vanishing from sight. Hopefully that would throw him off the trail or something.

Invisible, I made my way back to the throne room where Demetri was waiting for the one minute to elapse. I softly tapped the back of Rosalie's hand so she knew I was still there. She tapped back discreetly; to the onlooker it might have looked like she moved her hand back a bit.

"Demetri, you may track her now," Aro said magnanimously.

Demetri remained still. Curious, I walked toward him until I was right at his side. The slope of his forehead—once as smooth as marble—was now creased in concentration. A shadow of worry passed over his burgundy eyes, and I smiled as I realized that he _hadn't_ caught onto my mind.

"Demetri?" Aro probed.

"I—right—" Demetri said, and went to the archway I had exited from earlier. I followed him.

He stepped through, and walked towards the stairs I had stopped at. Hesitantly, he climbed up. Once he reached the top, he scanned the wooden doors on the floor and shook his head.

"This is stupid," he muttered under his breath.

I couldn't have agreed more, but I did think it was pretty funny that he was trying to find someone who was right behind him. Demetri looked around once more before heading back down stairs. He passed by the marble archway this time, and headed north—the other direction I could have gone from once exiting the throne room.

There was nothing there but an open stone archway, where an empty desk stood unattended to. Beyond that, there were other closed rooms, tapestries, and the such. Letting out an exasperated breath, Demetri turned his back and walked back to the throne room.

"—Oh, yes, she's adjusted well to the vegetarian lifestyle," Carlisle was saying as Demetri and I reentered the area.

"Demetri?" Aro said. He sounded more smug than surprised. "The allotted time is not over yet."

Caius's eyes narrowed on Demetri. "Did you find her?"

"I must admit," he said after a moment, "that I cannot detect her using my gift. It is as though…she doesn't exist."

"I see," Aro said gleefully. He looked out to the Cullens. "Shall we wait the remainder or go find her?"

"No, it's fine," I said out loud. "I'm still here."

Demetri jumped, which was understandable, since I was right next to him. He looked around wildly, as did Caius and a few other guards.

Aro clapped his hands lightly. "Marvelous, my dear. Would you reveal yourself?"

I walked back over to Carlisle as I cleared my head. The effect was that the Volturi saw a pair of legs walking on its own—then, a headless body. By the time I stopped besides my family, the entirety of my body had reappeared.

"An untraceable vampire," Caius hissed. He looked to Demetri sharply. "You could not track via scent?"

"She does not have one," he said. I would have thought he would be annoyed from having his gift rendered useless by me in public, but he sounded mostly curious.

Caius glanced at me, and his eyes burned into mine for a moment. "An undetectable vampire is a dangerous liability," he addressed Aro hastily. "If she were to go rogue, there would be no way for any of us to catch or detain her."

Oh, _fuck_. That wasn't a good thing to hear. And it didn't help that Caius looked like he _wanted_ me to go rogue. I did _not_ come to Volterra to be executed. Apparently, Rosalie had the same thought, because her hand shot out to grab mine. She pulled me back, towards her and Emmett.

I turned to Edward. He was appraising Aro coldly, watching the Volturi leader closely. Edward didn't seem particularly worried, so I hoped it was only Caius who really thought I might be a threat.

"Let us not jump to any conclusions, brother," Aro said. His eyes lingered on Demetri for a moment before returning to my family. Demetri, for his part, was staring at Caius with open incredulity. "Although, I must admit…having a vampire that is immune to capture is rather worrisome."

Edward whispered something to Carlisle urgently.

"You must have seen from Alice's memories that Tess would not do anything to jeopardize the vampire world," Carlisle said, stepping forward. "She has adjusted remarkably well to our lifestyle, and has respected Volturi law thus far."

There were _laws_?

"That may be so," Aro granted, "but it would be careless to decide one's nature based on inductive reasoning. I am sure Alice would agree—the future is rather variable. Anything could happen."

My jaw was tight, and I was gripping Rosalie's hand almost as hard as she was gripping mine. I was beginning to think the Volturi really might execute me. My eyes wandered to the stone archway, where there was only one guard standing by now—Felix. I supposed if Aro were to try to kill me, my family could provide enough of a distraction for me to vanish and slip out of the castle.

But I hoped it didn't come to that, because then Aro might use my family against me.

I was beginning to think Rosalie was right: we shouldn't have accepted this invitation.

Alice whispered something to Carlisle this time, and he seemed defeated. Addressing Aro again, Carlisle asked, "What do you suggest?"

Aro looked thrilled that Carlisle had asked. "Let Therese stay a while, so that we may judge her character. At the end of—let us say—two weeks, we shall make a decision as to whether or not she can be trusted with a power as dangerous as hers."

My grip loosened. Rosalie's eyes narrowed at Aro.

"Would it be too much to ask if we might all stay here?" Carlisle said. "Tess is the youngest member of our coven, and it would be very remiss of me to leave her on her own in a foreign country."

Aro's smile froze. "Of course," he said, sounding very much like he didn't want anyone else but me here. He fell back into his throne and lazily gestured at Demetri. "Demetri, if you could show the Cullens their accommodations…?"

Demetri stared at Aro for approximately half a second before frowning and directing us out of the atrium. I got the distinct feeling that he wasn't used to be being treated as a bellhop.

I stuck close to Rosalie and Emmett as we made our way out. I looked back to the three thrones at the center of the room. Marcus had slipped back into deep disinterest, and Caius was glaring at our receding forms. But Aro seemed delighted, still. Frowning, I turned back around. I didn't know exactly what he was planning, but if it had anything at all to do with swaying me over to the Volturi's side….

Well, the Cullens and I had had our rough patches, but I remained steadfast in my belief that nothing on earth could ever tear me away from my family.

* * *

A/N : i really hope you guys enjoyed the chapter! :)


	15. Normal People

Chapter Fifteen

Demetri's faint irritation did not lessen in the slightest as he led us away from the chambers we had convened in earlier. He kept the farthest from Edward, although I couldn't be sure why. It might have been the perpetual grimace that Edward wore or simply the fact that Demetri was afraid Edward might catch his thoughts. If it was the latter, I hoped Demetri knew that a distance of one meter wouldn't exactly prevent Edward from reading his mind.

"The East Wing is completely vacant," Demetri murmured. He was at the front, leading us up a set of spiral stairs, with Carlisle right at his back. He stopped at the very top, at the threshold between stairwell and hall, and gestured towards the doors that lined both sides of the corridor. "You'll have your pick of rooms."

Carlisle and the others stepped past Demetri, receding further into the hallway. Esme went towards the door closest to her and curiously traced a finger along the lacquered wood. The doors here were much larger and thicker than a typical bedroom door, with metal strapwork along the top and bottom and large latches. They looked like they led to cells rather than bedrooms.

"Thank you, Demetri," Carlisle nodded once, and retreated further back as well.

I touched the door opposite Esme's and absentmindedly asked, "Which one has the most comfortable bed?"

There was a stark silence that followed, and I realized that that probably wasn't a good question to ask the guard of an enemy coven. Sheepishly, I looked away from the door I was facing. Demetri was the only one in my immediate line of sight.

The corners of his lips twitched up, and he looked like he was trying to stifle a laugh. "There are no beds," he said.

I stopped a very sarcastic _great_ from slipping out my mouth and just gave Demetri a jerky nod.

"Where might we hunt?" Carlisle asked a second later, saving us all from stewing in the awkward, stilted silence I had created. "Do we have permission to use the local forest, or is that prohibited?"

"No, the grounds may be used to your disposal," Demetri said. His eyes passed over all of us. "It is only the locals you cannot touch...but that shouldn't be a problem for you. Do you require anything else, or is that all?"

"No, that is it," Carlisle said, and gave Demetri something of a smile, which Demetri did not return. "If anything else comes to mind, we shall endeavor to find you."

"And I you," Demetri said, and this time his eyes lingered on me. "Well, some of you."

With that, he turned around, dark cloak swishing against the stonework floor, and began to descend the stairs rapidly. When he was out of view, Carlisle opened the door of the room at the edge of the hallway and gestured for us all to enter.

The room was rather small for a castle. True to Demetri's word, there was no bed. But there were lounge chairs and an assortment of velvet pillows. There were a set of thick, heavy curtains which were drawn tight over a large window, rendering the entire room dim and shadowed. There was a chipped fresco on the wall opposite the curtains, and a variety of candelabras dotted around the room. It was by far the strangest decor I had ever seen.

"So, now—" I began only for Edward to immediately shush me.

He was frowning, and his eyes bore into the ceiling. No doubt there was someone above us, either passing by or, more likely, trying to hear what exactly we were up to now. I bit my lip and stared up at the ceiling as well, straining my ears to hear even the slightest sound. After a couple of minutes, I heard the quiet shuffle of feet padding against shale, and I looked to Edward. He was still frowning and waited a bit longer before giving a quick nod to Carlisle.

"So, now what?" I asked again, this time in a hushed tone. "We're stuck here?"

"It seems so," Carlisle sighed. He looked to Alice. "Will we only be here for two weeks, or will Aro drag this out?"

"Can we leave _sooner_ than that timeframe?" Rosalie urged. "Is there anything we can do?"

Alice shook her head. There was a frown stitched on her lips, and it looked strange on her. "This might have been avoided if you'd let Aro look into your mind," Alice told me, and I didn't miss the bitter tinge to her words.

"Sorry," I said immediately. "You weren't near me then, so I didn't know what to do. And I didn't even realize I had my mind covered until Aro took my hand. I didn't want to reveal it then either, because then the tracker would be able to—you know."

"Well, that's one good thing," Emmett granted. "The tracker can't track you."

"Yes, and the one _very bad_ thing is that we're stranded here," Alice said. She looked back to me. "You do realize Aro _knows_ you lied, right? Because when he read through my memories, he saw that you do know how to let your invisibility wane."

"Wait, what?" I said, alarmed. This made sense, of course. But I hadn't realized it, hadn't even considered the possibility of Aro finding out anything about me. But of course he knew about me. Because of Alice, he probably knew more about me than I did. He probably knew the finest details of my future.

"Oh, you're right," Esme said, anxious as well. "I hadn't even noticed then. I was too worried about—" her eyes found Carlisle's, "—well—everything else."

"But Aro didn't even say anything," I said, racking my brains, trying to remember if he had conveyed some sort of thinly veiled warning to never lie to his face again. "He didn't even seem to notice."

"Of course he didn't say anything," Edward said. "He was too pleased by the opportunity that had been presented to him. Or perhaps the better word is challenge."

My brows furrowed. "What do you mean?"

"Aro is keeping us here in an effort to persuade you to switch allegiances," Edward continued. "His inability to read your mind was both a dilemma and a gift, because while it won't tell him _how_ to persuade you it will give him time to do so. The whole 'keep you here for two weeks to judge your character' is just a ruse."

"All because I didn't uncover my mind for him?" I said, aghast. In one moment, in _one_ word, I had changed the course of our time in Volterra. "Well if he knows I lied, then I might as well go to him right now and let him root through my memories. He'll see I have good intent, and they've got to let me go then. They won't have an excuse to keep us here at that point."

"There's an idea," Emmett said.

"It might provoke Aro's ire," Rosalie said thoughtfully, "but if it'll get us out of here…."

Carlisle shook his head. "If you come forward with the deception, Caius will say you proved his point. There is a reason Aro didn't point out the lie. He kept it to himself because it gave him a political advantage, and he knew we would keep it to ourselves, too, because otherwise we would incur Caius's wrath."

I wanted to refute Carlisle, wanted to tell him that if I explained my motive they would understand why I had lied. But I remembered the mad gleam in Caius's eyes, the hungry look that devoured his face when he said 'dangerous liability.' They would market the lie anyway they wanted—treason, fraud, deception—if it gave them any sliver of a chance to gain the upper hand over my family.

"Then what do you suggest we do?" I felt like we were all precariously placed on a tremendous chessboard, one that I had only just begun to realize existed. Where would be safest to move next? Where was Aro positioned, and what could he see that we could not?

"Wait it out," Carlisle said.

"We can't just—" Rosalie began, irate.

"It's the least risky option," Alice agreed.

"We _can't_ stay here," Rosalie continued on her tirade. "Are you all _insane_? You know what the Volturi do. They spy and they trick and they tear covens like ours apart. We won't last two weeks in this godforsaken place—if we'll even be allowed to leave after two weeks. We've got to leave _now_."

"Leaving would be an insult to the Volturi," Jasper said. "We would only be painting a target on our backs."

"And that's worse than being sitting ducks?" Rosalie demanded.

"They would catch us, Rose," Emmett said softly. "Remember—they would send Demetri."

Something like hesitance passed over Rosalie's face. Her fury crumpled. "Right," she said, defeated. "Right."

"We all _know_ the Volturi's intentions," I said after a moment. "How much harm can they do if we know? Whatever they say to me, I'd always take it with a grain of salt."

Edward looked to Alice. "How much harm can they do to us Alice? If we _all_ know?"

Alice's frown increased in severity, and I wondered if she had seen something she didn't want to tell the rest of us.

"The Volturi are canny," Carlisle said for Alice, but he was looking to me instead of Edward. "Aro knows we know. He won't pull you towards the Volturi in any obvious way. I've no idea what he plans on doing, to be honest."

"But we were all just in there during the genesis of whatever clever plot he's considering," I said. I turned to Edward. "You must have heard what Aro's thinking of doing next?"

"Well…"

"Aro has most likely abandoned any strategy he came up with while Edward was there," Jasper said. "And whatever Edward picks up on moving forward will probably be a fake plan Aro wants us to latch onto, something that will drive us to unwittingly complete his real plan."

"He's that good?" I said, half-apprehensive and half-unconvinced. Could someone _knowingly_ believe in something untrue?

"He's the very best," Carlisle said, and there was a terrible ache that ran through his words. "There is a reason the Volturi have lasted this long."

Two weeks here might last two centuries if this was the way we were going to spend it—hidden in the shadows, following every thought and anti-thought Aro had, paranoid about even the slightest shuffle that emanated through the walls.

"Then how can we just 'wait it out'?" I said desperately. "If we can't predict what Aro will do, if we can't be sure what he's thinking—how can we avoid whatever pitfall he'll almost certainly lay at our feet?"

"This is exactly why I think we should just leave," Rosalie muttered.

"You know we can't," Alice said, voice steely.

"You can't see anything?" I asked Alice. "Is it because I'm thrown into the mix? I can uncover my mind—"

"No, don't do that," Alice said immediately. She paused for a moment, closed her eyes briefly and then reopened them. "I can see...some things, but it's all variable. Probably because Aro isn't making up his mind."

Of course. That was the first step to confusing a psychic. I bit my lip and looked from Rosalie to Alice. "Can you see the outcome of our stay here?"

"Yes, but nothing is fixed," Alice repeated.

"Would I switch sides?"

"I don't know," Alice said, but she wasn't looking at me anymore. She wasn't really looking at anyone anymore. "I don't know."

I swallowed thickly. But I _wouldn't_ do it. The thought of joining a coven that I had only met twenty minutes ago, the thought of someone like Caius—like _Aro_ —becoming my family: it was inconceivable.

"It's not just you," Edward consoled. "He also wants Alice and me to join the Volturi, but that's kind of a side project next to you."

"Why is it a side project?" I looked between Edward and Alice, and frowned. "If I were Aro, I'd think a psychic would be a much better asset than someone who can just turn invisible."

"No, I just meant—" Edward began then faltered.

"You're the newest member of the coven and the youngest vampire," Alice said. "I think Aro sees you as the easiest to sway over, the one with the highest likelihood of success."

My eyes didn't leave Edward's. "Is that it?"

He nodded.

"Are you sure?"

He rolled his eyes. "Yes, something like that."

"Well, _is_ it like that or _something_ like that?" I demanded. I turned to Carlisle. "There's nothing else you're all keeping from me, right? I'm not a small child anymore, so if there's something else, you ought to tell me."

"There's nothing else," Carlisle said wearily.

"Okay," I conceded. "Well, I guess if both the future _and_ Aro's thoughts are too variable to pin down...then we'll just have to remember that, at the end of two weeks, whatever happened, whatever it was that was said to us—it was a trick."

Easy enough, right?

* * *

When vivid orange streaked the sky at twilight, my thirst became too unbearable to ignore. I had a low tolerance for thirst compared to the others. It seared the back of my throat like a hot poker—constant and unrelenting—until I could barely comprehend anything other than the drive to end the pain. I could barely last a week and a half without feeding, and it had been nearly two weeks since I last fed.

Rosalie was in need of blood as well, and we had resolved to leave together once it neared night (so that we could travel to the wood under the cover of the dark). But just as the sun was beginning to set, Aro sent a lesser guard to call Carlisle and Alice for a "chat." Naturally, everyone was suspicious. Carlisle asked for Rosalie and Edward to stand near the room Carlisle, Alice, and Aro were supposed to convene in. Emmett, Jasper, Esme, and I were all supposed to stay together in the East Wing in case Aro was going to send someone up to "sway us to the dark side," as Emmett had put it.

We were all in different rooms, mostly because Esme had gotten tired of Jasper and Emmett passing the time by coming up with ridiculous puns. She went back to the farthest room in the hallway (now her and Carlisle's bedroom), and, soon after, I kicked Jasper and Emmett out of the room I had chosen.

It was across from Esme and Carlisle's, but not much bigger. There was a large bookcase shoved into the corner, with books whose pages were so thin and ancient that I was afraid they might crumble to dust if I breathed too hard on them. I had spent the better part of the hour perusing the bookshelf before moving on to find some sort of secret passageway in my wall. Unfortunately, I found none.

The minutes ticked by. The day grew darker. My thirst burned brighter.

When the light from the sky had completely extinguished, I decided to leave the castle. My window was already open, so I jumped through it and leapt down the side of the parapet, scaling down with barely concealed desperation. The thirst clawed at my throat like some wild animal, and I would do anything—anything at all—to tame it.

The forest was not exactly difficult to locate, because the Volturi castle was a part of it. The vast, empty acres of land stretched out for only a mile or so before transforming into dense woodland. I stopped at the threshold, still and silent as any predator.

I felt only a little guilty as I stepped into the wood. Emmett might be worried if he finds I'm not back in the East Wing, but he'd hardly kick up a fuss and alert the whole castle. It would only draw attention. I didn't think I'd run into any Volturi guard here, either. After all, none of them were vegetarian, so what reason would they have to come here?

I scouted the forest for a bit longer, before happening on a pack of wolves who were scouting as well. I vanished as soon as I spotted them. I usually didn't hunt while invisible, partly because I often hunted with Rosalie, who had a panic attack nearly every time I disappeared, and partly because turning invisible while hunting took the fun out of it. There wasn't any challenge in it.

But with wolves turning invisible was necessary. Hunting wolves while visible was possible, but it was annoying, because the whole pack would pounce once they realized how much of a threat you were. And, suddenly, you would have six or seven wolves on you instead of one. And everytime you tried to catch one to bite, another would be in your way.

I didn't have time for any of that, so I darted forward and grabbed the first wolf I saw. She yipped in surprise, and the other wolves growled, but they saw nothing. Once the wolf was in my grasp—writhing and snarling—I sped away from the pack, and my invisibility waned as I did so.

Once I found a clearing, I settled down and snapped the wolf's neck. My fangs pierced her pelt like it was butter, and I drank the free-flowing blood greedily. Each swallow sated the fire little by little, until, finally, it was like a spark at the base of my throat. It was irritating and still present, but nothing I couldn't handle.

I sighed in relief, and let the limp, drained wolf fall away from me.

"It's a shame," a smooth voice called out.

My head lifted lightning-quick. Not even ten yards from me was the Volturi guard Aro had asked to find me—Demetri. Had he found me just now?

No—though my body was visible, my mind remained steadfastly hidden.

But apprehension crept down my back like a cold sweat anyway. Had Aro sent this tracker to keep an eye on me, to persuade me to join the Volturi, to simply torment me? Not for the first time in my life, I cursed my own hubris. I did not exactly regret feeding, because I had been desperate to sate the thirst, but I _should_ have waited until Rosalie and the others returned.

"What is?" I asked after a moment. I wiped the blood that had dribbled down my chin against my forearm.

My eyes darted around the side of the clearing. Which side had I entered from exactly? This was another reason I usually hunted with Rosalie. She had a knack for direction I simply lacked. When the thirst took over, all I knew was prey. The moment between stepping into the forest and feeding was a blur, and the forest looked the same in every direction. I was sure I could find my way out eventually, but that might require trial and error, which would require time.

Demetri's crimson eyes travelled across my face. There was a hint of a smirk playing at his lips. "That your gift hides such beauty."

 _Don't trust the Volturi._

I shot Demetri a withering look. Was this guy serious? My hair was in disarray from rolling around in the muck with the wolf. My clothes were stained with spots of mud, and my maw was dripping with blood.

I didn't answer the guard, electing to walk near the border of the clearing. I sniffed cautiously, trying to discern the path I took while carrying the wolf.

"Your name is Therese, correct?"

I turned slightly, and I saw that Demetri had come closer.

"Well, that's what Aro called me, so it's probably my name," I said slowly.

He was doing this trick with his eyes that made them soft and smouldering at the same time. The sparse moonlight struck the crimson of his irises in such a way that they almost seemed amber. The sly smile was still stuck to his lips. He looked very alluring, and I knew he was doing it on purpose. I had seen Rosalie do something very similar—with hooded lids and demure smiles—in order to get her way with unsuspecting people.

I wasn't sure what Demetri might have wanted from me, but I was sure he wasn't going to get it by playing this game. I might have fallen for it if I were still human, might have let myself get caught up in all the coyness and charm vampires like the one before me tended to exude.

But I was a vampire, too. And I was a little over it.

"What do you want, exactly?" I asked.

"Pardon?" The smirk receded into a tight smile.

He seemed a little defensive, so I tried another route: "If you want something, you can just ask."

"I only wanted the pleasure of your company—"

I snorted. "I wouldn't really call this pleasurable." It was more annoying with a dash of awkward.

"No," Demetri agreed, surprising me. The smirk was back, but his eyes were now alight with amusement rather than enticement. "And yet you continue to make conversation."

"Is this how you greet all new vampires?" I asked, circling the edge of the clearing. "By following them into the wood?"

"It was only by chance," Demetri said smoothly. "I was seeing someone into the castle, when I saw a figure scale down the East Tower." He paused, then added: "We have perfectly good stairs, you know."

"Leaping through the window was faster."

Demetri hummed in agreement. His crimson eyes followed me as I traced around the clearing for the third time. I had been trying to pinpoint the scent of the wolf I had carried with me, trying to work backwards to figure out the path I had taken to end up here. But the spilt blood in the center of the clearing tainted everything. The whole area smelt of wolf.

"Are you lost?" Demetri asked after a moment, and there was a hint of smugness in his words.

"What do you _really_ want from me?" I asked, tired of the pretense.

The moon had begun its nightly arc through the sky. By this time, Carlisle must have finished his talk with Aro. My family most likely knew I had gone. Rosalie was likely throwing a fit.

"I only want to know more about you." He gave me that same smouldering look from earlier, and I resisted the urge to simply vanish and leave him behind. But it would take me much longer to find my way back to the castle without him.

I didn't exactly think he was lying. When he said he wanted to know more about me, I was pretty sure he just wanted to know more about my gift—specifically, perhaps, how to overcome it with his own.

"Fine," I said. "You can ask me one question, but you've got to show me out of this forest."

He smiled amusedly. "I would have led you out anyway."

"Oh, good. Then no need to ask me a question, I suppose—"

He blinked in surprise. "No, hold on—"

I was already walking out of the clearing. He caught up with me immediately.

"Turn left," he said after we were at least two meters away from the clearing.

We walked in utter silence for a couple of minutes. Stray shafts of moonlight fell through the canopy, lighting us as we passed under it. I began to count the number of toadstool crops that appeared on the forest floor. It was interesting at first, but after one hundred and two, I fell bored.

"Can you track inanimate things, too?" I asked Demetri after the silence became too stifling. "Are you tracking the castle to lead us back to it?"

"No, I'm tracking the people who live in the castle to lead us back to it."

"What's that like, exactly?"

"I thought we weren't going to ask questions?"

"I said that about you, not me."

He didn't respond, and I watched him from the corner of my eye. His brow was furrowed slightly, and he wore a similar look of concentration that Edward wore when he was trying to focus on faraway thoughts—but Demetri's was far less intense. There was something almost relaxed about it. Perhaps he had been tracking people for so long that his gift was like second nature, requiring only minimal effort.

I couldn't bear the thought of returning to counting mushrooms, so I decided to forgo my earlier rule: "Fine. You can still ask me a question, _but_ it can't be related to me being a vampire."

Demetri glanced at me. "But you asked me a question related to my vampirism."

I shrugged. "Take it or leave it."

Demetri fell silent for several more moments. Just as I counted my one hundred and third crop of mushrooms, he spoke:

"Why did you ask about a bed?" Demetri asked. He was fighting back a smile. "Do you still use one?"

I narrowed my eyes at him. " _Yes_ , I use one. I don't use it for sleeping anymore, obviously, but I like to lay down, and beds are nice and soft. To be honest, I'm really appalled at the lack of beds in your castle. What do you do when you just want to rest?"

There was a brief moment of silence, and then Demetri said: "I use a chaise, of course."

"A—what—a _chaise_?" I laughed. The sound echoed through the empty wood. "That's _so_ uncomfortable! You can't spread out on a chaise."

"And you can't sit comfortably on a bed," Demetri said. He was grinning now, too. "Quite frankly, I find your ignorance of the benefits of chaises to be appalling."

I shook my head and tried to swallow my laughter. "You know—when I asked what you used to rest, I really thought, for a moment, that you were going to say 'coffin.'"

Demetri scoffed. "Those are so out of style."

"Are you implying that they were once in style?"

"Well, the myth must have started from somewhere, right?"

I snorted. "I mean, myths like that also say we're allergic to garlic, and that one was _way_ off the mark."

"Well, we can't really eat _any_ food, so I would say that that particular myth is technically right." Demetri stepped forward. "We're at the border of the forest now, by the way."

I sprinted forward a bit as well. As soon as we stepped out of the thicket, I caught sight of the castle. It looked the size of a pebble based on our distance. My stomach dropped to my feet as I realized the frenzy my family was probably in. I stilled at the edge of the wood.

Demetri stopped when I did. "Would you prefer to run now?" he asked.

From the sliver of information I learned earlier, I knew that Demetri could tell where people were. He knew people in the castle, and that was what led us out of the forest. Could he tell where people were in relation to each other? Would he be able to tell if Carlisle, Alice, Rosalie, and Edward were still preoccupied with Aro, if Emmett was still wasting time in his room with Jasper?

But, if I asked him that—would he think the relationship I had with my family was tense? That I had been trying to escape them? And then, would he report this back to Aro, who might see this as an opportunity to weaken the bond between me and my family?

"Are you...okay?" Demetri said after a moment.

I blinked, and tried to shake away the confused face I had put on. God, this was frustrating—having to think five steps ahead, having to determine the moves of a person I had only just met. I'd barely spent a day in Volterra, and I was already tired of it.

I tore my eyes away from the pinprick of a castle. Demetri's face was half-shadowed and half-illuminated. He didn't seem to be anything like what my family had warned me against. _Don't trust the Volturi_ , they had warned me over and over, but Demetri didn't seem particularly untrustworthy. To be quite honest, he didn't seem to be very good at being untrustworthy.

"Can I ask you a favor?" I said.

"You can certainly ask," he said carefully. I supposed being around Aro for centuries had taught him to handle words with the utmost caution.

"Let's just pretend we're normal people."

The corners of his mouth ticked upward.

"I'm serious," I insisted. "I don't like having to predict what's coming next or looking over my shoulder at every moment. If you want to know something, just ask. And if I want to know something, just tell me the truth."

Demetri was trying to fight a grin off his face. I was pretty certain that he must have thought I had been some kind of court jester in my previous life.

"Okay," he agreed.

"Great." I stuck out my hand for him. "Hi, my name is Therese. But you can call me Tess."

He took my hand and gave it a soft shake. "Hello, Tess. My name is Demetrius, but you can call me Demetri."

* * *

A/N : i've been editing and re-editing this chapter for a while. it's a bit choppy and i'm still not 100% happy with it, but i thought i should stop wasting time on this chapter and move on to the next. i hope you enjoyed it! thank you all for your reviews by the way; they're very encouraging and heartwarming to read! :)

 **spiritgirl16** : thank you for all your kind reviews! there will be a lot more demetri/tess interaction moving forward. and, later on, tess will definitely affect some of the events involving bella. i'm planning on kind of speedrunning the events of twilight when we get there; i have a completely different ending in mind, though.

 **trouvaille** : first of all, lovely username! i think you're definitely onto something with aro  & matchmaking! he's almost certainly got something up his sleeve.

 **Autumn Rabbit** : thank you for the kind words! it makes me very happy to know that you're enjoying the writing and that the characterization seems well done (i feel like i invested a lot of time into that and i'm glad it paid off).


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